Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

Str8, nice sentiment, but judging by its cover, I think this book is useless. I find it hard to believe that any over-35 woman, after all those years of waiting for a husband, would settle for a wedding ring made of yellow gold, and even more difficult to believe that someone with a Harvard MBA would suggest that anything less than platinum is acceptable. Really.

And since a simple platinum band would look just like sterling silver or white gold (the horror! the fakery!), she really should have used a channel set diamond band for the cover.

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

I never realized my channel set diamond platinum band actually signaled to some that it wasn't fake... unless of course, it's cz or moisenite. I must start running in different circles.

board motto
 

That's not as bad as your teacher telling you the Santa is a fake...santa is a fake

MIRAMAR, Fla., Dec. 4 — As far as some Florida parents are concerned, first-grade teacher Geneta Codner is a true grinch after she told her class that Santa Claus was “make-believe.”

SANDRA JOLLY said her 6-year-old son’s Christmas was spoiled when the substitute teacher made the statement in class on Monday.
“He had this sad, lost puppy dog look on his face. This unhappy, empty look,” Jolly said. “He said his teacher informed the entire class that Santa is make-believe.”
“It’s all been blown out of proportion,” Codner said. “I’m sorry (parents) think I meant it that way. We were just having a discussion. I don’t know where all this hurt came from.”

Men With Small Dicks Often Hurl Insults on Online Bulletin Boards
 

That is very possible. The Melt Banana I know is a chick-fronted Japanese noise-rock band with kind of spastic songs and weird staccato off-kilter vocals. Does that sound like the Banana-Grabber character? Similar?

What's in your CD changer...
 

...or MP3 if you know how to use one (I don't)?

(1) Wilco: Summerteeth (can't get enough)
(2) Outkast: the new one (following the masses (hi E/O!))
(3) Pearl Jam: Lost Dogs, etc. (angry Eddie)
(4) John Denver & the Muppets (nothing is better than hearing Beeker chime in on "The 12 Days of X-mas")
(5) The "High Fidelity" soundtrack (always finds its way back)

And you?

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

With what kind of people are you forced to associate? Get out of the mall -- now. Do not stop at Zales.

15 step program
 

Good point. But there are 15 steps?
Hell I thought there was just 4.

1. Plastic surgery of the implant/lipo variety
2. Dye hair blond
3. Wear slutty clothing
4. Hang around the country club

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/03...2,TopRight,7,-

http://a1204.g.akamai.net/7/1204/140...00/7035147.jpg



Well, I went to AMazon to see the sales rank on this little bible and am now totally inspired. Though I note I am not yet in the age demographic of the book, but the good lord knows I dont want to be there and be single.

From Amazon:

From Publishers Weekly
It is difficult to say what exactly is "simple" in this step-by-step plan for finding a "wonderful man" in 12 to 18 months. It certainly is not the part where Greenwald instructs the participant to call every person she knows-from her doctor to her ex-boyfriend-and make known her commitment to finding a mate. However, this Harvard graduate maintains that her program works for most of her clients as long as all the steps are implemented faithfully. Although it can be time-consuming, financially taxing and sometimes nearly humiliating, this approach will achieve the desired results, the author says. Drawing upon her marketing expertise as well as her experience with clients, Greenwald teaches the reader to always put her best foot forward, be willing to compromise on her ideals in a man and take rejection in stride. The book takes a reactionary, conservative approach to dating: she emphasizes the importance of femininity and of letting the man make the first move; "men are usually more attracted to women in skirts than in pants... literally as well as figuratively." Exploring all the options available to singles, including online dating, singles events, community programs, even changing everyday habits (i.e., going to Starbucks instead of drinking coffee at home and shopping at the supermarket instead of the grocery store down the block), Greenwald covers all the bases and provides a thorough program for dedicated women who have made a priority of finding that special someone.


***
I am calling on all of you to help me find a mate. I vow to wear skirts more often (bc men are literally and figuratively more attracted to them though I dont know what this means - is it a little wordplay on "figure"? As in she has a nice figure? ) and realize that not every man can be Mark Phillippoussis (but this does not mean I cannot pretend they are when I am banging them). I promise to act more feminine, will let the man make the first move (this little piece of advice is aimed at the Spinster Cougars) and will spend more time at Starbucks. While I am not sure what the difference between a supermarket and a grocery store is, I will find out (though Giant is down the street so I am a little confused). Please PM me, IM me or email me at paigowprincess@yahoo.com. I will fly to the prospect's town (if that isnt making the first move), and if your man marries me, I will reward you handsomely. I hope lawtalkers finds a nice sponsor for this challenge. The 34 spinsters who rated the book only average 3.5 stars out of five, which gives me hope but not utter confidence. But I bet if the truly bitter spinsters werent included in the ratings, it would be pure five stars all around. So please help me. I don't want to grow old alone. I don't know how I got to this sad place, but I have hope that you all can hand me the key to unlock the door so I can slam the door on spinsterhood forever.

Thank you for playing.

This is a serious post. I will consider all marriage minded men.http://a1204.g.akamai.net/7/1204/140...00/7035147.jpg

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

And, as I'm sure you know, it's amazing how judgmental some SAHMs (and, to be fair, people in general) can be toward moms who work for pay. And it's amazing how quickly working-for-a-paycheck moms are labeled as "selfish" by others.

I don't judge people who make different choices in this situation. I do, however, judge those who presume to tell others that their choice is the only correct one.

Santa's catch up
 

I thought it was based upon a Coca-Cola advertisement from around the turn of the century.

All other Santa statements are mainly correct. My only other Santa factoid is that St. Nicholas was a Turkish bishop.

mentoring
 

There's a whole "here's your official Newbie Permission To Ask Potentially Dumb Questions" thing that is very well served by the formal process. It's a reassurrance that everyone needs to ask, and that it's okay to do so. Aside from that, I agree that you do better by eventually figuring out the go-to people on your own.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Nat King Cole: The Christmas Song
4 mixes: Funk, 70s Soul, Christmas, 60s Soul

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

Sweetie? Is that you?

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

The very fact that you recognize that you are running in circles is a good start.

What's in your CD changer...
 

196 songs at 320 kbs.

(Ya' gotta get a Rio Nitro.)

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

I have to keep warm somehow while my seat heater is being repaired... it gets COLD in this part of the patch!

What's in your CD changer...
 

1. Time Out of Mind - Dylan
2. Allmans - Live at Atlanta Music Festival 1970
3. Best of Deep Purple (love the tune "Demon's Eye")
4/5. Johnny Cash Box discs 2,3
6. Sigur Ros (untitled or self titled - can't tell... someone gave it to me)
7. Pink Floyd - Ummagumma (Live Album)
8. Gov't Mule - Deepest End, Disc One
9. Rage Against the Machine - New Live Disc
10. Kings of leon - Youth and Young Manhood

What's in your CD changer...
 

(1) Johnny Cash - American Recordings (aka American Recordings 1)
(2) Warren Zevon - I'll Sleep When I'm Dead, Disc 2
(3) Willie Nelson - Red Headed Stranger (hey, not everyone can be dead)
(4) Barenaked Ladies - Gordon (this relates to a previous discussion - I don't care how popular they are or whether they sold out - Gordon is a great album)
(5) The Wiggles - Big Red Car

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Your entire post is a rip-off of the "Find Denny a Mate" effort to marry off Dennis Kucinich, who, you may want to note, is still available.

If you google it, I am sure you can find out where to sign up for a chance to win Denny as your new hubby.

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

Whoa. Can you break that down for me in layman's terms?

TM

FB Song Board
 

No, but it's not a bad song. Jay Z speeds it up and the beat he uses is better.

You can listen here:

http://www.tigersushi.com/site/frame...jsp&RcdId=1163

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Paigs, show some dignity. Really. You will get the mother of all hairy-backed bald-headed Viagra-snorting gold-medallion-wearing pimp-car-driving total assholes by debasing yourself this way. And you know you're reading this so just take my advice.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

I'm sure you're wrong.

Paigow invented finding a mate.

What's in your CD changer...
 

1. Liz Phair - Exile in Guyville
- Second to Neko on my Chicago singer/songwriter crush list. If they ever were on the same bill, I'd have to be given oxygen. Seeing Liz Sat. with Mrs. Hand at one of those radio station holiday shows (bnl and Jason Mraz also on the bill).

2. new OutKast (following the herd... moo)

3. Counting Crows - Films About Ghosts

4. Uncle Tupelo - 89/93: An Anthology

5. (80's retro category) The Cars - 2 Disc Anthology

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Excuse me but you seem to imply (or perhaps I am just inferring) that

1) someone else who I never heard of invented this idea

and

2) I am not serious. I assure you I am.

From everything I have read here written by YOU about your wife (including why you have to remain a lawyer despite your utter boredom with the practice of law), that paragraph just described her.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

The book calls for compromising one's ideals in a man and being willing to tolerate humiliation. Dignity is for smug marrieds.

More interesting subject: changing priorities midstream (or: I have a cool dad)
 

Yeah, but the question of what to do when one party flat-out changes their mind mid-stream is a tough one. For (annecdotal) example: the Mr. and I have always assumed I'll work, and earn a shit-load of a lot more money than the Mr. ever will. We've also always assumed that the Mr. will be primary caregiver when we have kids, and that whatever high-minded occupation he takes on will more-or-less permit that (e.g.: he may work, but if the kids get sick or daycare burns down, he is the one to stay home or figure it out). This was discussed and agreed to be mutually pleasing pre-marriage.

But, what if, upon having kids, we discover that I want to be a SAHM? What if the Mr. discovers that, to his surprise, he doesn't really like all children, he just likes children that he can send home with their parents, but he can't get a job to replace my income? What if, kids or mortgage or no, I finally have a nerveous breakdown and quit to paint bad watercolors of dolphins, leaving neither of us with any viable means of support? All stuff that can legitimately happen.

Should the pre-agreement hold without mutual consent? Can my Mr. indenture me to my job for the sake of his previously negotiated stay-at-home status? Can I effectively unilaterally force him into a different career to pay the mortgage? Can I say "OK, I'll keep working and you take care of the kids and do your [insert flex-schedule intellectually-rewarding thing here], but we're moving to Oklahoma City so I can come home at 5"?

I've been thinking along these lines because I had a good chat with my Dad over Thanksgiving, in which we talked about my not liking the nature of my job very much (not the work itself, which is fine, but the unpredictablity of hours and demands and the toll that takes on everything else which makes them overpay me to try to get me addicted to the cash so I don't wise up and quit). He said he'd always had a hard time understanding why I was so unhappy (until I had to work 12+ hour days over the entire course of Thanksgiving vacation and, when asked why I didn't leave it to talk after dinner said "because this is my job, this is what they pay me for, to be available for the clients whenever they decide they need it, and if I tell the partner I'm not doing this 'til Monday or just don't do it I'm fired" - then he understood what I've been bitching about for years a little better), because his lawyer (solo-prac with an associate, does everything from wills to small contracts to divorces and slip and falls) LOVES his job. His lawyer also goes home no later than 5 every day of the week and never, ever works weekends, takes 6 weeks of vacations a year, etc. He finally figured out that all lawyers don't do that. (I finally figured out why I look at his business papers and think "shit, Dad needs a lawyer.")

Anyhow, he talked about how, back when I was 5 or 6 or so, he decided, unilaterally, to leave his cushy, tracked, Fortune 500 job at which he was very successfull and take his life savings and buy into a speculative new business in a new town. He said he just couldn't take the big-firm pressures any more (in his case - travel 5 days a week, continual sales targets, etc. - different pressures, but still part of the "I'm not in control of my life/cog in a machine" thing that grates on many of us), and felt he had to do it. My mother cried for weeks, thinking he was cursing her to penury and risking her future (my mother, incidentally, quit her job the moment she got engaged. She had (has) significantly better education and credentials than my dad did. It was the '70s, whatever). But he did it anyway. And, for him, the gamble paid off. But it might not have. And we talked for a while about needing to take risk, take control, that taking control is taking responsibility and, therefore, taking risk, etc.

Just a long way of saying I have a cool dad. Just because there's nothing new under the sun doesn't mean you're an incompetent for going through the same thing all over again.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Well then, google "dennis kucinich"* and "wife" and you may find your future hubby sooner than you realize.


*someone please jump in if I have misspelled his name

Housing Dilemma
 

Wasn't this a SexintheCity episode?
If he flashes her back and then runs into her in the grocery store, he'll just find out that she was mooning the hot woman who lives above him.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Had she not been on ignore (denial isnt a river in egypt, pj) I woud have responded exactly the same.

the book description didnt say how far I had to go in lowering my standards.

I am game. Hook me, people.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Obviously from my new sig. line, I've been listening to Yankee Hotel Foxtrot in the car. Here at work, it's the following new stuff:

(1) Jay-Z: The Black Album
(2) Damien Rice: O
(3) Jet: Get Born
(4) Strokes: Room on Fire
(5) Death Cab for Cutie: Transatlanticism
(6) The Shins: Chutes Too Narrow
(7) The Stills: Logic WilL Break Your Heart
(8) Elliott Smith: Figure 8
(9) Transplants: Transplants

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

his last name looks like it is pronounced coochie. Surely there is a footnote in the bible that says I dont have to marry that kind of last name.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Jay Z: The Black Album
Biggie: Life after Death (disc 2)
South Park Christmas Album
Eminem: The Eminem Show
Pharcyde: Bizzarre Ride
Tupac: Greatest Hits

What's in your CD changer...
 

I hate to ever say Less is right (but he isnt here so I may be safe) but he is right when he says that there is a monthly poll that allows people to post what their favorite music is so we can get to know a little more about them and they can show up how cutting edge they are.

But he isnt marriage minded so he is not eligible.

Well, then she's an awfully dumb cunt, because I ain't rich enough to keep anyone happy.

And maybe you should pay attention, because if you did, you'd know I stated that she now has a very lucrative gig. My hatred of law stems from my hatred of everything. Its irrational. Ever since Sidd asked me why I hate things, I've been asking myself the same question. Beats me, but its interesting to think about... but probably not very interesting to post about. Selah... I'm a broken record.

And you're race baiting me.

What's in your CD changer...
 

I may have started the poll, but I think it's quite obvious that my current musical pleasures are not cutting edge.


Write what you know.

Exactly! No matter what I say, that is Thurgreed's response. However, I take solace in knowing I am helping him to work through his issues.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Oh bullshit... you and I used to waste time discussing dead shows on the board, which was pretty useless to most people.

More interesting subject: changing priorities midstream (or: I have a cool dad)
 

And when it does, you must be willing to discuss and renegotiate. And, as someone pointed out earlier, it suddenly becomes about something more than your needs, or your husbands needs, and becomes about the wee one's needs.

I actually believe that everything always works itslef out just the way its supposed to. I also freely acknowledge that I'm a bit of a Pollyanna that way.

Are you like my unknown biological half-sister? Because that sounds an awful lot like my Dad.

From him I have learned that risk is a good thing, and that sometimes it is good to be very brave....

Of course, from Mom I learned that it is very good to squirrel away a little of the grocery money, and that one should never leave the house without a littel lipstick and mascara.