I'm staying off the streets
 

Bore us! Bore us! Did they send any of your severed digits to your family? Did they make you read a statement condemning something or other? Tiger cage? Duct tape? Hmmm?

As for the other story, that's what you get for going to the drive-through. The genteel and sophisticated crowd can only be found inside the restaurant. And maybe Eminem couldn't read, and was only acting out of his rage and shame, you literacist fuck.

Just a class for RT
 

Guitar lessons
Japanese
Sailing (friend did this recently and loved it)
Mixology

Just a class for RT
 

Your sourpuss avatar becomes more becoming by the minute, sourpuss. And I think you forgot to press the "old" button about six or seven times when you were creating it, btw. Nice, though. Really. It is.

Just a class for RT
 

In no particular order:

1. A course in music composition or recording methods.

2. Golf -- to improve my crappy game, and as an excuse to play more often.

3. Metalworking.

4. Woodworking/Cabinetry

5. Creative Writing

Just a class for RT
 

You can't get irritated if I do that. I don't get irritated with people who don't dismiss it as bullshit. It's art. Like what you like.

I'm staying off the streets
 

Whoa. Hold the phone.

1. Who did you kidnap?

2. Why?

3. Have you released them yet?

ETA: Dammit, Ironweed

Just a class for RT
 

Quit it. You're ruining Sebby's schtick.

Just a class for RT
 

Clearly you don't hang out in the art world.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

So poll: Best examples of casting from TV/movies? What roles just had to be played by the person who ended up playing them? [/QUOTE]

Just a few...

A young Nicholson as Randall P. McMurphy (Cuckoo's Nest)

Hackman as Royal Tenenbaum (Royal Tenenbaums)

Brando as as Vito Corleone (Godfather

Elizabth Taylor as Maggie Pollitt (Cat on a Hot TIn Roof)

Andre the Giant as Fezzik (Princess Bride)

Jeff Bridges as the Dude (Lebowski)

Just a class for RT
 

I don't get it either, especially when you see people copying artists, like Mondrian's signature structured style or Pollock's kinetic energy, over and over in all walks of life.

And it's not like that's all they could do. Many artists whose work looks like something you could do, were brilliant artists in the more traditional sense, too.

TM

Just a class for RT
 

Yours is perfect.

TM

Just a class for RT
 

Correct. My non-keg party discussions are usually limited to literature.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

Agree that choice for Gareth was truly inspired.

As I just saw it (for the umpteenth time) this weekend, my votes are from Gosford Park: Kristin Scott Thomas and Maggie Smith. (The girl who plays Maggie Smith's maid is excellent, but I don't know enough about her to say whether she's singularly fitted for that role.)

Just a class for RT
 

Don't know if it's a "course", but I'd learn to play the violin. (No, I'm not kidding.)

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

Bill Murray, Lost in Translation

Just a class for RT
 

Why would we think you're kidding about violin after the trapeze thing? Violin sounds downright pedestrian in comparison.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

Excellent list. I would add:

Samuel L. Jackson - Jules Winnfield (Pulp Fiction)

Don Knotts - Barney Fife

Jimmy Stewart - George Bailey (It's a Wonderful Life)

George C. Scott - Patton

I'm staying off the streets
 

Sorry, I had just gotten stoned and was waiting for the munchies to kick in before I knew what I wanted, and then it came to me - a fucking BK veggie burger. Then I went home and committed suicide.

Just a class for RT
 

Thanks for reminding me. I had a (STUPID, STUPID) fall off my horse on Saturday, leaving me a bit lame (no, in the other sense or that word). However, I am bravely sallying forth to my next trapeze lesson on Friday.

In sum, my life's ambition is to be a copy-editing, violin-playing carnie. Hey. It could happen.

Just a class for RT
 

Did the horse try to shoot you?

Just a class for RT
 

1. How to grow things with hydroponics
2. Plant breeding
3. Glass blowing

I'm staying off the streets
 

I didn't kidnap anyone. I think i was about to get tossed into a car and taken to god knows where to do god knows what with. But I survived.


NOw back to my BK veggie....

Just a class for RT
 

If there were a course that would teach me to play every Jim Croce song on the guitar (pronounced here "GEE-tar") and every Vince Guaraldi tune on the piano, I would take it. The problem is, they all make you start with scales and shit. Fucking bullshit fundamentals. Oh, I think I'd also want to play every Stevie Wonder song on the harmonica, but I wouldn't want to pay extra for that.

Just a class for RT
 

Speaking of Jim Croce, my evidence professor was in love with his son A.J. Croce and spent much of class encouraging us to also love him.

Wrinkles
 

I just noticed that I am getting wrinkles. What can be done, if anything? This sucks.

To Whomever Posted that thing on Umbrellas earlier
 

did that guy replace Bob Levey? His column looks identical. what a rip off! I had no idea Bob Levey was gone!

Just a class for RT
 

They don't really start you out with scales on the guitar, although you may start out with something like Michael Row the Boat Ashore or Kum Ba Yah. All you need are 3 chords, a red guitar and the Truth. They don't really teach you the Truth, either.

Just a class for RT
 

Now I have a mental image of a giant lizard strumming a guitar and singing "Michael Row Your Boat Ashore" soulfully.

Wrinkles
 

Just a class for RT
 

I was 7 at the time. I was hardly a giant. But I was pretty big compared to the ones the cats barf up on my doormat.

Wrinkles
 

My gym, you know--the one with the tanning bed, sent me the usual monthly magazine. The one I never read except for this month's with a catchy headline about how the sun is actually good for you and you shouldn't really stay out of it.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

Travolta as Vincent Vega fits here nicely as well.

Some more:

Harrison Ford as Han Solo

Gregory Peck as Atticus Finch

Jane Fonda as Barbarella

Kevin Spacey as Verbal Kint

Morgan Freeman as Red Redding (Shawshank Redemption)

Woody Harrelson as Mickey Knox (Natural Born Killers) and as Roy Munson (Kingpin)

Willem Dafoe as Jesus (Last Temptation of Christ) and as Elias (Platoon)

How it feels to get shot.
 

In what will likely be hailed as a public service to residents of Cook County,* the Sun-Times gives us an article on what to expect to feel when you've been shot.

How it feels to get shot.

Warning: About a 3/10 on the gross-out scale. No pics.

*Who represent 1,600 of the roughly 55,000 Americans who experience non-lethal firearm injuries every year.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

James Earl Jones' Voice as Darth Vader

The guy who played Jaws in Moonraker

Peter Fonda as a crispy motherfucker in easy Rider

Hopper as a freak in Easy Rider, Blue Velvet (Frank Booth), etc...

Robert Duvall as the general in Apocalypse Now

The Irish guy who gets beaten across the countryside by John Wayne in the Quiet Man

Eastwood as William Munny

Eastwood as Dirty Harry

Eastwood in every spaghetti western

Robert Downey as a coke casualty in <0

Everybody in Mystic Pizza

Chris Plummer as Mike Wallace in the Insider

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

Keanu in Bill and Ted's. He should have retired after that.

Just a class for RT
 

I'm trying to see if the Leisure Learning Unlimited (our learning annex) course catalogue could fulfill any of these course requirements.

The closest I can find is: Rainwater Cisterns & Other Ways to Use Rainwater in the Landscape (course 1162A)

Drip Irrigation (course 1232A) is probably the second closest. Stay away from Xeriscape: Low Water, Low Maintenance Gardening (course 1269A).

I recommend that you take both Growing Herbs in Houston (course 1271C) AND Harvesting Herbs (course 1275A).

Fun with Glass— Fundamentals of Fusion (course 1505D) is your course.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

I read or heard somewhere recently that the role was offered to Paul Newman before Eastwood, but he turned it down. That might have been interesting.

More evidence that most Americans have terrible senses of humour
 

When did this go from "only possible person" to "well cast"?

Since it's now the latter, I'll put in

Andre the Giant as Fezzik (The Princess Bride).

And I contend that he was the only person suitable for that role.

How it feels to get shot.
 

Actually, I like to think that we are pretty good about shooting tourists at higher rates than those of us who get shot while outside of Chicago...

Wrinkles
 

Lots of hot sex with a young stud. All the screaming, moaning and sweating makes them go away, for some reason.