What's in your CD changer...
 

The albums do have names (and they're not as unweildy as the Fiona Apple-type crap that's become more and more common). The first one is the Agaetis Brynjun or something, it's the one with the baby/alien head, but everyone I know just calls it "The First One." The second one is the white one, officially called ( ), but everyone just calls that "The Second One."

Whatever, but I'll have you know I prefer to bate myself.

What's in your CD changer...
 

That was then, this is now.

What's in your CD changer...
 

A more apt title is "Pretentious and Boring."

If you like this band, you suck.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

That describes Dennis Kucinich to a T.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Fuck. You got me there.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Most recent selections:

Belle & Sebastian, Fold Your Hands Child
Beth Orton, Pass In Time
Compay Segundo, Gracias Compay
White Stripes, White Stripes

Skip if you're sick of the convo (or are NotBob or Paigow)
 

I believe in diversity, not assimilation
peacekeeping, not policing
and that the beaver is a proud and noble animal

(heartwarming stuff. makes me want to drink a beer for some reason)

More interesting subject: changing priorities midstream (or: I have a cool dad)
 

True enough. If any or all of those things were to happen, obviously, something would have to change, whether it is your lifestyle, where you live, or where you send you kids to school, or whatever.

No. See below.

Obviously, things can always change. Don't most couples talk about back-up plans, or "what if" scenarios? You've gotta have a back-up plan! If these are not the kind of things (child-having, and -care decisions, career decisions, lifestyle decisions) two people can come to a mutually [no hyphen] acceptable agreement about, I'm afraid the crystal ball shows dark clouds on the horizon.

Mr. Perfect
 

Paigow - My advice to you if you are serious (and I strongly suspect that you are a bit serious, although not completely serious) is to look at men who fall into a looks category one less than you. So, if you are an 8, look for a hubby in the 7's. Consider the 6's if they have alot of money.

Also keep in mind that you are probably one looks category below what you think you are (it is human nature to think we are a bit cuter than we really are). So if you think you are an 8, look for a hubby in the 6's since in reality, you are probably a 7. Consider the 5's if they have alot of money.

Skip if you're sick of the convo (or are NotBob or Paigow)
 

Because I love you:

http://www.videoclipstream.com/akamai/therant/rant.html

Click on the "play" icon on the lower left of the little tiny screen

What's in your CD changer...
 

The Vince Guaraldi "Charlie Brown Christmas" soundtrack -- I always break this one out early.

The new Liz Phair CD (the name escapes me) -- my wife heard the single on the local ClearChannelInfinity station, and had to have it.

Joni Mitchell's "Ladies of the Canyon." Last week it was "Blue."

A CD by the Donnas that the Not Bobette left in my car. It rawks.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

If you need a book to find a mate you should voluntarily take yourself out of the gene pool.

Addendum to PP
 

The reason you want to do this is because (as I am sure you know from reading the FB), men always want to think they are with a hot chick. So if you look for a mate who is one looks category below your own (or 2 below if they have alot of money), you should be able to find one.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

In your favor, you are approaching that age division at which a large number of now-married men will suddenly become single once again. There is a pronounced bump in the divorce rates right above your current age, having something to do with the average age at marriage compared to the average time to become dissatisfied, combined with the dread of the approaching decade marker. So, have patience. You will soon once again be inundated with guys.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Well, not quite. The wonderful former boy-mayor of Cleveland actually has a nice head of hair.

http://www.kucinich.us/images/dennis_photo.jpg

aV

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Sebby, direct this someplace else and learn to recognize a joke when you see it.

Edited to add, what I mean to say is, I do hope you're not suggesting that I am over 35 and unmarried. I mean, whoa, you're scaring me with the very idea!

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Plus, even within the joke, I don't think paigow intends to breed, just to (find a) mate. and as a fellow spinster (per raouaouaouaoal), I also can certify that I am not planning to breed. Of course, I also would be utterly incapable of following the directions in that book, from my skim of the review pp posted.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Good point. However, whenever I picture him in my mind, he is bald. Go figure.

Santa is a poseur
 

My first day of first grade, the teacher introduced herself to the class by saying "This is the First Grade - you're all big kids, now, you know there's no Santa, no Tooth Fairy, no Easter Bunny ..."

There were a lot of crying kids at recess that day.

Santa is a poseur
 

Was that your first year of explaining the history to the masses?

I can see it now... BRC holding court on the jungle gym...

Furniture shopping
 

Does anyone know of a good place in the NY area. Preferably Long Island where I can buy decent furniture for a good price.

P.S. for those of you who are wondering Dealtoy is finally getting off the fence. And I feel pretty damn good about it. :)

Yet another holiday tradition.
 

As I have done the last several years about this time, I give you the lyrics of one of my favorite Generic Winter Gift-Giving Holiday songs. Enjoy.

The Christians and the Pagans
Dar Williams

Amber called her uncle, said "We're up here for the holiday,
Jane and I were having Solstice; now we need a place to stay."
And her Christ-loving uncle watched his wife hang Mary on a tree,
He watched his son hang candy canes all made with Red Dye No. 3.
He told his niece, "Its Christmas Eve, I know our life is not your style,"
She said, "Christmas is like Solstice, and we miss you and its been awhile."

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table,
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able,
And just before the meal was served, hands were held and prayers were said,
Sending hope for peace on earth to all their gods and goddesses.

The food was great, the tree plugged in, the meal had gone without a hitch,
Till Timmy turned to Amber and said, "Is it true that you're a wtich?"
His mom jumped up and said, "The pies are burning," and she hit the kitchen,
And it was Jane who spoke, she said, "It's true, your cousin's not a Christian,"
"But we love trees, we love the snow, the friends we have, the world we share,
And you find magic from your God, and we find magic everywhere,"

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table,
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able,
And where does magic come from? I think magic's in the learning,
'Cause now when Christians sit with Pagans only pumpkin pies are burning.

When Amber tried to do the dishes, her aunt said, "Really, no, don't bother."
Amber's uncle saw how Amber looked like Tim and like her father.
He thought about his brother, how they hadn't spoken in a year,
He thought he'd call him up and say, "It's Christmas, and your daughter's here."
He thought of fathers, sons and brothers, saw his own son tug his sleeve, saying,
"Can I be a Pagan?" Dad said, "We'll discuss it when they leave."

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table,
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able,
Lighting trees in darkness, learning new ways from the old, and
Making sense of history and drawing warmth out of the cold.

What's in your CD changer...
 

1. Let it Be...Naked--The Beatles
2. Heavier Things (?)--John Mayer
3. Famous Among The Barn--Ben Taylor Band
4. Youth and Young Manhood--Kings of Leon
5. Self-titled--Los Lonely Boys (hi e/o!)
6. Fire in the City of Automaton--No Knife

Santa is a poseur
 

The "truth" about Santa, et al, like sex/safe sex, is one of those things that parents don't want to trust teachers to discuss with their children -- unfortunately, most of those parents never get around to handling the discussion themselves.

I still believe in Santa and as far as safe sex is concerned I have a child -- 'nuff said.

What's in your CD changer...
 

1. Underground hip hop album evoking deep hip hop knowledge and street credibility

2. Classic hip hop album demonstrating old school cred

3. Obscure indie rock group on the edge of breaking it big - you heard it here first

4. Exotic world music selection by non-crossover group, for diversity sake

5. Punk/noise rock selection that nobody has heard of with shocking or striking name

6. Jazz CD - lesser know selection of jazz giant to round out diverse musical taste and help ground the list a bit

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

You mean, besides the Blow Job Camel and the Bahston guy? I am talking marriage material here.

What's in your CD changer...
 

Where's the 80s pop compilation to demonstrate retro irony?

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

Clarification. I am unsure whether I want to breed. After I get to the Nile and the Pyramids, I might be more amenable to it. Hopefully that will be this summer.

Anyway. will you be on the Retreat for Unwed Ladies in their Thirties and Up? I hope so bc check out what else is in the goodie bag. This should be right up your alley.

Men Are Like Fish: What Every Woman Needs to Know About Catching a Man

From Amazon:

Book Description
More than just another relationship book, Steve Nakamoto’s award-winning Men Are Like Fish (Writer’s Digest Magazine Self-Published Book Awards Nonfiction Honorable Mention) stakes claim to being "America’s #1 Metaphor For Romantic Love."
ForeWordReviews.com recently gave this book its highest 5-Star rating saying, "An exceptional book. Sweetly old-fashioned, yet wickedly on target. Both single women looking for that perfect catch and those seeking to recapture the romance of an existing relationship will find great value here. Men Are Like Fish is guaranteed to give even the most jaded and discouraged romantic angler a new, more joyful perspective on the oldest sport in the world."

In this innovative approach to love, readers will discover unique thinking tools for making smarter relationship decisions such as:

* The Big Fish Test: How to Size Up Men More Accurately

* A Woman’s Alluring Wiggle: How to Keep Men Fascinated Forever!

* How Women Spook Men Away Early: Why Guys Don’t Call Back

* 101 Favorite Fishing Holes: Where the Big Ones Are Biting

* The Bait Self-Quiz: What Really Makes a Woman Mega-Attractive?

***


As I am sure Cooter would tell you, we all thought it was the women who are like fish. Apparntly not. And this got an honorable mention for some award that I dont feel like scrolling up to look at again, but I am sure its very prestigious. Wonder who it lost to? Anyway there is no more jaded and discouraged romantic angler at The Firm than you, so I serioulsy hope you put down the documents and join us.

Santa is a poseur
 

Heh heh. Actually, I did hold court at the jungle gym, but for purposes of enslaving the rest of the class to my magical powers. Somehow, I had them all convinced I was a powerful witch, and if I pointed at them and said "zap!" they had to lie down and not get up until I released them. (Apparently I was some sort of David-Koresh-like charismatic leader, or something - I freaked out a teacher when a couple of the kids refused to get up, because I hadn't released them, even when the teacher and principal ordered them to, big parent/teacher conference on that one - I wonder what happened to my all-powerful powers of persuasion? Or maybe I really did have magical powers, mou ha ha ha ha.) Anyhow, climbing the jungle gym gave me greater range, and I could cast my powers over a greater area of kids, and make them fall down and get up in waves as I spun around.

BR(I invented the wave)C

Santa is a poseur
 

Um, count me as one parent that doesn't think that a teacher (in a public school at least) should be spending ANY time talking about Santa Claus.

Or the Easter Bunny.

aV

Furniture shopping
 

IKEA (who beat me to the punch?)

Sounds like someone is moving out. But to long island. again, how low is my bar?

Love the thumbs up baby.

P.S.
 

FB Friends,

Thanks to all of you for your support over the years. It meant a lot to me. I couldn't have done it without all of you guys.

First and foremost: EvenOdds and Fugee -- you two are just the greatest, most sensitive and kind friends anyone could hope for.

Hang Ten, SEC Chick and Rabbit Rust - you are awesome, thanks for everything.

Take care,

Skip if you're sick of the convo (or are NotBob or Paigow)
 

If youworked for me,I'd let you shave your head.

I'd tell you you looked silly, but I'd let you do it without your career suffering. At least because of that.

New Lawtalkers contest! Marry off paigow!
 

I'm pretty sure any woman who earnestly studies a book like this would just have to end up as a Master Baiter.

An Observation
 

Few things are really as much fun as bitch-slapping opposing counsel over some issue you only pretend to really care about.

Greedy, lazy, user, ho-bitches
 

I'm sorry. You were apparently not included in the distribution list. This conversation is required to be conducted on the basis of generalizations only. No recognition that we are all individuals and perhaps the stereotypess being heaved around don't apply is allowed.

But we do have some lovely parting gifts. Paigow, care to tell her what she's won?

An Observation
 

Two things that are more fun than bitch-slapping opposing counsel over some issue you only pretend to really care about:

1. dropping ecstasy; and

2. having sex for the first time with someone you are extraordinarily physically attracted to (with or without dropping ecstasy).

Housing Dilemma
 

Don't break the deal. If you haven't seen her before, she's obviously new. Bring her a lovely housewarming gift. I suggest a bottle of wine, a vibrator, and your cell phone number.

You might also want to break down and get that new digital camcorder.

The IT people are probably going to drag me off now
 

I just searched for something on the old Fashion thread and was astonished to see, in a post by Atticus, a huge picture of a naked and not very beautiful woman sticking a finger up her fully shaved "self" and using her other hand to pour water down her neck.

This was not the original picture, I am pretty sure, and I am wondering if the link Atticus used has changed.

And I am seriously concerned that tomorrow I will come in to find that I cannot access lawtalkers anymore. As I got the hell out of dodge pretty quickly I don't remember the post number but I think it was from September and it showed up after I searched "ecstasy," clicked on a Sparklehorse post, and scrolled up the page.