LawTalkers - Fashion Board 1-08-04 through 02-03-04

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
We were invited to an afterparty and we were assured that it would be mellow. After stopping for beer at a gas station with a loudly playing police scanner, we arrived at the party. There were a couple of guys in the yard playing catch with an ax.

The artist took us on a tour of his garage studio. Instead of clowns, the motif seemed to have changed from clowns to mangled bloody baby dolls. Baby dolls impaled on antlers. Baby dolls embedded into dashboards. All viewed to the spoken word recordings of a collaborative effort called Big Snuff and a 10-year old kid in clown makeup separating the clear ice from the cloudy ice in the beer tub.

It's very possible that I ended up at that same after party, though it was located at the Museum of the Weird in the Heights and it was Halloween night. At one point I was handcuffed to a girl gone wild. Was there by any chance a pyromaniac at the after party?

Quote:

After the party ended, we toured Waco looking for a hotel. No rooms were available because of a skeet shooting tournament in town that weekend.

I bet you anything that Billie Bisset from Ledbetter won the woman's division in the skeet shooting competition. She's amazing. Same thing happened to me in Clovis, New Mexico, except it was a gem show AND a base ball card convention in town. I slept in my car that night and it was freezing cold. My usually reliable cheap mexican serape failed me.

Aloha Mr. Learned Hand

01-28-2004 09:04 PM

So Much For The Duet

Hide the children in LA! A Chicago judge has given singer R. Kelly permission to come to LA to attend the Grammys ceremony.

One of the conditions of his travel, however, is that he not associate with Michael Jackson while there...

Link

Atticus Grinch

01-28-2004 09:07 PM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by Tyrone_Slothrop
Aside to Atticus: Maybe you should rethink how you want to spend that $3K.

I clearly budgeted enough for a case of Stoli and whatnot.* No problem here.

*In honor of Wonkette, I'm going to be using the phrase "and whatnot" quite a bit here for the remainder of the week. You may ignore or Ignore as appropriate.

Tyrone Slothrop

01-28-2004 09:14 PM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
I clearly budgeted enough for a case of Stoli and whatnot.* No problem here.

*In honor of Wonkette, I'm going to be using the phrase "and whatnot" quite a bit here for the remainder of the week. You may ignore or Ignore as appropriate.

The link was about an avalanche hitting a train in the Rockies. I'm not sure a whole case of Stoli would be enough to salvage that week.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy

01-28-2004 09:28 PM

For Ty

For Ty

Tyrone Slothrop

01-28-2004 09:33 PM

For Ty

Quote:

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
For Ty

48/50 (missed the Carolinas)

Alex_de_Large

01-28-2004 09:34 PM

Baltimorons

What not to do with your car in the snow.

spree: home movie of some idiots trying to get a car out of the snow

baltassoc

01-28-2004 10:30 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
One of the most surreal nights of my life was at a clown-themed art exhibit in Waco.[Scary clown shit]
I have not been to Waco since. But I still enjoy clowns.

STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP!!!!! LALALALALALALALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Even if it weren't in Waco this would be about the creepiest thing ever. I'm going to have nightmares for days.

baltassoc

01-28-2004 10:34 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Clovis, New Mexico

What is this, horrible nightmare day? It's no Hobbs, but still.

-balt(not Nick)assoc

Anne Elk

01-28-2004 10:37 PM

Coulrophobia

Quote:

Originally posted by baltassoc
STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP!!!!! LALALALALALALALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Even if it weren't in Waco this would be about the creepiest thing ever. I'm going to have nightmares for days.

Have no fear, help is available here. (It's clown free)

Hank Chinaski

01-28-2004 10:39 PM

HANDJOBS

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Wanker and TM DPing

who is wanker? it can't be me and TM. we're both 6'11" which would mean a decent chance of us kissing if this ever happened.

Hank Chinaski

01-28-2004 10:42 PM

HANDJOBS

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Who knew that PP had something in common with the Sports Guy: hatred of Arliss.

mind of the Married Man was way worse than Arlis. MotMM sucked as a premise, as well as realized, at least for some of the reasons Sebastina mentioned. Arlis only sucked as realized.

ltl/fb

01-28-2004 10:43 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by baltassoc
What is this, horrible nightmare day? It's no Hobbs, but still.

-balt(not Nick)assoc

I don't see why you are so stressed out. Is the license plate on the car in AdL's thingy a Maryland plate?

Hank Chinaski

01-28-2004 10:44 PM

Fashion news

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by NotFromHere

And when is it OK to wear a velour tracksuit outside of the house?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I do not know the answer to this question, but I hope that when more knowledgeable Fashionistas weigh in, we reach a unanimous decision of "never." For me, that look just screams cougar.

Well i've worn them bowling. i hope you don't mean to exclude their functinal application.

baltassoc

01-28-2004 10:45 PM

Coulrophobia

Quote:

from site:
If you are living with Clown Fear, what is the real cost to your health, your career or school, and to your family life? Avoiding the issue indefinitely would mean resigning yourself to living in fear – missing out on priceless life experiences big and small – living a life that is just a shadow of what it will be when the problem is gone.

For anyone earning a living or at school, the financial toll of this phobia is incalculable. Living with fear means you can never concentrate fully and give your best. Lost opportunities. Poor performance or grades. Promotions that pass you by. Clown Fear will likely cost you tens, even hundreds of thousands of dollars over the course of your lifetime –– let alone the cost to your health and quality of life. Now Clown Fear can be gone for less than the price of a round-trip airline ticket, or a few weeks of drugs or conventional therapy.

(emphasis added)

Come on, it's not that bad.

Besides, the site defines Coulrophobia as "a persistent, abnormal, and unwarranted fear of clowns," (emphasis in the original) so clearly it doesn't apply. My fear in not unwarranted. Clowns are fucking scary.

Hank Chinaski

01-28-2004 10:48 PM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
You really need to post more often and liven things up around here.

not7y(need the page hits)S

??? I had a bet you were the anon!!!!

baltassoc

01-28-2004 10:49 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I don't see why you are so stressed out. Is the license plate on the car in AdL's thingy a Maryland plate?

Yes, definately. And the houses just scream Maryland (or in particular, Columbia). Those are the kind of guys that make us proud. Sniff.

Man that's funny.

Hank Chinaski

01-28-2004 10:56 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
At the outskirts of town, the parking lot of the Mardi Gras Motel seemed to be empty except for a couple of large dark Mercedes sedans. The door to one of the rooms was open and I could see several bright photograpy-style lamps set up and a couple of scantily clad women running around the room, giggling.

As I approached the front office, a man got out of one of the sedans and intercepted my path. "All the rooms are full. You need to go somewhere else," he told me.

This is not an accurate report of the evening.
My sister and i made movies to pay for college, sure, at hotels? yes.
But Would I just send away 4 rich kids, when she could have earned me $200 at the next break instead? No.
SS and friends were being obnoxious, I remember him yelling "I wanna play Texas hold 'em" and it degraded from there. We had our reasons, thats all I'm saying.

leagleaze

01-28-2004 11:17 PM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Embellish, please.

Sure. It wasn't me.

Dave	01-28-2004 11:26 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
This is not an accurate report of the evening.
My sister and i made movies to pay for college, sure, at hotels? yes. But Would I just send away 4 rich kids, when she could have earned me $200 at the next break instead? No.
SS and friends were being obnoxious, I remember him yelling "I wanna play Texas hold 'em" and it degraded from there. We had our reasons, thats all I'm saying.

Do you recall where Kazuhito Tadano was on the night in question?

ltl/fb

01-28-2004 11:28 PM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
This is not an accurate report of the evening.
My sister and i made movies to pay for college, sure, at hotels? yes.
But Would I just send away 4 rich kids, when she could have earned me $200 at the next break instead? No.
SS and friends were being obnoxious, I remember him yelling "I wanna play Texas hold 'em" and it degraded from there. We had our reasons, thats all I'm saying.

Lizard is rich? cool.

Pretty Little Flower

01-28-2004 11:39 PM

Yow.

O.K., that was damn cold. I mean, I know what you are saying Hank - about how we live in the land of ice and snow and really have no business complaining. But it was 10 below at the beginning of the game with wind chills in the negative 20s. If I can't whine then, when can I whine? Huh, Hank? When does a guy get to whine? I mean, I know Bilmore would just suck it up stoically. But fuck that. It was damn cold and I'm complaining.

So anyway, at the bar after the game, there's this hot, somewhat older woman. Velour track suit. Giving me that look. Long story short, I scored digits tonight, baby! And I take back everything I said earlier.

ltl/fb

01-28-2004 11:52 PM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
So anyway, at the bar after the game, there's this hot, somewhat older woman. Velour track suit. Giving me that look. Long story short, I scored digits tonight, baby! And I take back everything I said earlier.

you finger-fucked her? out in the cold? did that warm you up?

ETA did you get frostbite between taking your gloves off and delving in?

Pretty Little Flower

01-29-2004 12:01 AM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
you finger-fucked her? out in the cold? did that warm you up?

ETA did you get frostbite between taking your gloves off and delving in?

Was I supposed to take my gloves off? Oh well, she didn't seem to mind. In fact, some chicks I know insist I wear a glove.

ltl/fb

01-29-2004 12:04 AM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Was I supposed to take my gloves off? Oh well, she didn't seem to mind. In fact, some chicks I know insist I wear a glove.

the kind of gloves that keep your hands warm are different from the kind of gloves that keep the dirt from under your fingernails from getting into sensitive places.

But I'm sure a smoooooth operator like you knows that.

Pretty Little Flower

01-29-2004 12:17 AM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
the kind of gloves that keep your hands warm are different from the kind of gloves that keep the dirt from under your fingernails from getting into sensitive places.

But I'm sure a smoooooth operator like you knows that.

You give me too much credit. I am not very experienced in the ways of love. The Flower is not a player.

Dave	01-29-2004 12:17 AM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by leagleaze
Sure. It wasn't me.

There you were, given carte blanche to lie your ass off -- isn't that the dictionary definition of "embellish"? -- thereby enhancing your FB reputation, and instead you took the high road.

I'm not sure whether I'm impressed or disappointed.

ETA: Given the most likely reasons to read this board, I'm going with disappointed. Details, even if fake, are good.

bilmore

01-29-2004 12:17 AM

HANDJOBS

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
and then there's other times when the sex is hot and I think "Shit, now I know why I married this chick."

A lasting relationship in the bloom, I can tell.

(Don't oversimplify this shit. It makes you sound cheap, and I don't think you really are.)

bilmore

01-29-2004 12:22 AM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
not7y(need the page hits)S

You need a new gig, guy.

Buy me a drink in a week or two.

bilmore

01-29-2004 12:24 AM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Dear Cougar:

You are not an unattractive woman. And you appear to have the means to purchase expensive clothing and accessories. What I urge you to do is to exhibit some retraint. I understand that you have some insecurities, and that you are dealing with these insecurities by dressing in a manner that makes you think you appear young and perhaps even hip. But, you tend to come off looking a little gaudy in pink Juicy Couture track suits. Personally, I blame your friends. You are all hanging out together at the same bars, shopping at the same stores, and reinforcing what is, to my admittedly untrained eye, a disastrous fashion trend. Flashy is not always the way to go, and sometimes trying to dress young will only emphasize to others that you are not. I am, in general, a fan of outre fashions. Further, I am perhaps not the best person to distinguish for you the difference between chicly avant-garde and eye-poppingly gaudy, having recently purchased a purple velvet blazer. I guess, the best advice I can give to you is to not try so hard, because it just makes you look like you are trying so hard, and that is never an attractive thing.

Your friend,

Flower

You'd fuck her in a minute. Don't get hoity toity on us now.

bilmore

01-29-2004 12:26 AM

Double Pentration, Old School Style

Quote:

Originally posted by Tyrone_Slothrop
[also rescinded]

it's like it never happened at all

I don't think mods should be allowed to post, if they can rescind at will.

Dave	01-29-2004 12:32 AM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by baltassoc
the houses just scream Maryland

A good exorcist could help with that problem.

bilmore

01-29-2004 12:32 AM

Fashion news

Quote:

I'm not going to be able to tell you about my clown days, am I?

bilmore

01-29-2004 12:34 AM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I mean, I know Bilmore would just suck it up stoically. But fuck that. It was damn cold and I'm complaining.

Well, I certainly wouldn't post this weak shit. Jeez.

Pretty Little Flower

01-29-2004 12:37 AM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by bilmore
You'd fuck her in a minute.

I'm not sure it would take that long.

Quote:

Don't get hoity toity on us now.

Classy people don't use the phrase "hoity toity."

Hank Chinaski

01-29-2004 12:41 AM

Yow.

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by ltl/fb
the kind of gloves that keep your hands warm are different from the kind of gloves that keep the dirt from under your fingernails from getting into sensitive places.

But I'm sure a smoooooth operator like you knows that.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
You give me too much credit. I am not very experienced in the ways of love. The Flower is not a player.

Let me help. both glove types are soft on the inside. That's all that matters to your experience, and all that matters to your experience is all that should matter to yuo.
n'est pas?

Pretty Little Flower

01-29-2004 12:43 AM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by bilmore
Well, I certainly wouldn't post this weak shit. Jeez.

I actually didn't mind the cold. In fact, I played naked. And wet. And when I was on the sidelines, I found some metal to lick.

Hank Chinaski

01-29-2004 12:43 AM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by bilmore
You'd fuck her in a minute.

I have to say, the PLF = premature ejaculature jokes are past their expiration date.
edit:
now I know the reason for scrolling before posting.

Pretty Little Flower

01-29-2004 12:45 AM

Yow.

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
n'est pas?

I'm fairly certain you meant to say "N'est-ce pas?" N'est-ce pas?

Pretty Little Flower

01-29-2004 12:46 AM

Fashion news

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
I have to say, the PLF = premature ejaculature jokes are past their expiration date.
edit:
now I know the reason for scrolling before posting.

I don't think you really had to say that.

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