Bored
 

no, no, I'm sure it's a much hotter monogamy than pretty much any other monogamy here. Or, everyone imagines it is.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

You are. "[To Be Named By Coltrane]" is better.

TM

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

Feel free to change it back.

No one appreciates a single entendre anymore.

Prank on Iowa
 

This sounds good.

In a way, Riverside, Iowa, was asking for it.

As the "Star Trek" faithful know, William Shatner's character, the beloved Jim Kirk, was born — no, in fact, will be born — in Iowa sometime in the 23rd century.

Seizing on that crumb of information a couple of decades ago, an enterprising member of the town council of Riverside, population 928, boldly went where no Iowan had gone before and erected a sign proclaiming his community "The Future Birthplace of Captain James T. Kirk."

The result is Spike TV's "Invasion Iowa," a four-hour reality miniseries about the making of a make-believe movie, airing at 9 p.m. tomorrow through Friday.

"Iowa" ups the ante by making the pretend production a science-fiction movie set in Riverside. The star? None other than Kirk's alter ego, Shatner himself. The target of the ruse? The entire population of the town.

The plot of the movie is as silly as the entourage, involving an android she-villain with the improbable name of Disintegratrix 3000 and a plot twist in which a virtuous farm girl — played, like many of the faux film's characters, by a local amateur — offers to bear the child of Shatner's character in order to save her town from ruin.

Scores of would-be actors and extras lined up to audition for parts, happy to sing "Pinball Wizard" if Shatner demanded it or to repeat a line "with a Cajun accent this time" if that was what the star wanted.

One local man even donned a Priceline.com T-shirt to serve as a walking product placement for a Web site Shatner has been advertising for years.

The Canadian-born star (Str8?), who has spent decades doing what even some fans recognize as a tongue-in-cheek William Shatner impression, seemed to charm almost everyone he met.



Spike TV

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

I appreciate it.

As I was just discussing via instant messgaing technology, I wore a pair of tight, black and white, polyester plaid pants to a club within the last two weeks. They were very popular. The talk of the spin class the next day.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

Thanks.

I bought a pair of Zegna thin-waled cords (on sale...$38 -- sorry NFH - I bought it at uber-discount). Let's just say that Zegna doesn't make casual clothes for Americans. Suits? Yes. But these things were so tight in the ass/crotch (visibly)...yikes. Not good. Mamel toe, etc. You just can't get away with flaunting your plums and feeding tube that way on this side of the pond.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

how disproportionate.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

Zubas cornered that market.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

If you are not built like a European perhaps you should stick to the Dockers.

Or maybe stop buying the counterfeits on the internet.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

Smartbargains.com = not counterfeit.

6'2" 175, fatass.

If you were a guy, you would have a TEEEEEENY penis. With thorns.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

Bluefly or Yoox?

Yeah, tight is one thing. Suffocating your mammoth love anaconda is something altogether different.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

6'2"? That is quite short for internet standards. No one else here has fessed up to less than 6'4". Shrimp.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

Those things would suffocate NFH's penis.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

5'4" 175. Damn.

[To Be Named By Coltrane]
 

If Terri has an anaconda down her throat, she'd probably already be dead. I'm just saying. He confessed to feeding-tube measurements.