my ebay stalker
 

You can always just buy this guy's used Love Swing: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...166326168&rd=1

Spotted on the Beach
 

I have not seen the shorts, but she is not looking very good lately. Unlike Christina Aguilera, she can't afford to not look good for any amount of time, no matter how brief. Also, that new dude she has been hanging around (Federline?) looks like he lives in a van down by the river. Yuck.

my ebay stalker
 

Ya know, the lunchboxes at the American History Museum are nothing new. They were there when I lived there lo those many years ago. Of course I was too young and foolish to appreciate the worksmanship and design inspiration behind lunchboxes at that time and I rushed off to view the Hope diamond instead of truly savoring the exhibit.

Oh how I wish I had those times back again! Each night when I go to sleep I utter only one prayer. Please god, if you exist, please make the lunchbox exhibit a traveling show and bring it to Dallas. Of course this probably won't happen before I die, but what are we if we let go of our dreams?

That is why it is so appalling that a certain large-eared poster insists on outbidding all reasonable bidders on eBay for these collectible gems. And she lives in the DC area, after all, so she could be viewing the Smithsonian collection and allowing those less fortunate than her (location-wise) to have and enjoy those american treasures. Instead I guess I'll have to save up for a plane ticket and spend my dying days away from my family and friends in order to see that lunchbox exhibit one last time.

Spotted on the Beach
 

She's just getting ready for her inevitable fate after her boobs drop.

my ebay stalker
 

The fact that it's been used only once does not make it any more sellable.

my ebay stalker
 

I'm not really sure where she came from. Sometimes those things just happen. Despite her pink freshness, I was not altogether comfortable with her presence. Her presence in the shower with the band was just the final bit of persuasion I needed to go elsewhere to sleep. I returned in the afternoon to find Flipper and the pink little girl gone and the only evidence of the previous evening/morning was a brand new Flipper sticker on a PA amp.

my ebay stalker
 

Chill dude! If you read the lovely Bunny's earlier posts on the subject for the words rather than the beat, you would recall that the almighty Chef has seen this lunchbox collection and given it the DC Chef Stamp of Approval, which is good enough for me.

Maybe you are jealous of Chef because he is beloved by all of the FB Hotties while you would be lucky to get over on a 20-pisco-soured-up-Paigow.

So blow it out your piehole chump.

my ebay stalker
 

If it's actually true, he'll be thinking that there's a marginal chance that your bullshit story is true too. So, why worry?

I guess you're like so there! Sounds like your kind of scene.

TM

Spotted on the Beach
 

I totally saw them! Do you want me to, like, buy a pair so you can send them to Mrs. Chef so that she could give them to Cheffie? Hee hee. That would be totally cool. I bet he couldn't wear them to work though, even if they're totally big enough to be pants. That would, like, be a violation of his firm's dress code for sure!

Could you pick me up a Josie and the Pussycats lunchbox on Ebay in return? I know this guy whose brother was born without a head who really wants to give it to him as a gift. I'm not yet a partner, so I can give you $3 above whatever you pay. Awesooooooooome!

TM

Spotted on the Beach
 

With the stability of your job dude, I'd be saving the $3.

Spotted on the Beach
 

Where's the love? Your attacks on Chef are keller'dific, to the max.

Spotted on the Beach
 

Why, when I can always find some numbskull who will search the internet to find me whatever I want? I can live off of her stupidity forever.*

TM

* No, wanker, not my momma. I've lived off of her stupidity for as long as I could.

Sob stories
 

The ebay story (let me have it because I'm more deserving, even if I can't win the auction) reminds me of my recent experience with freecycling (visit http://freecycle.org/ to see if there's a chapter in your city). Apparently some people who wanted to get rid of stuff were being picky about wanting to make sure the recipient was truly "deserving"; then, there were people who thought they were more "deserving" who wanted to jump to the head of the line. Oy! I just gave priority to those who responded first.

One woman who wanted one of my items sent really strange e-mails with all the text in the subject header, and sob stories about not having a car and not knowing if she'd be able to borrow one to come pick up the item. I think she was hoping I'd offer to drive it over to her. Ha! I'm already giving the damn thing away!

Anyway, aside from the weirdos, I would highly recommend freecycling as a way of getting rid of stuff that's not high on charities' want lists. I got rid of a non-working lawnmower and an old thermal-paper fax machine, among other things.

tm

Spotted on the Beach
 

And if you have, can you get the name of the manufacturer? Just on the off chance they weren't properly licensed, you know.

Sob stories
 

Freecycling - I've heard of this. This is when you put shit out in paper bags on the curb and someone takes it home, right? I got myself some nice shirts that way from some rich folks down the block.