you know, you persist in ignoring what I tell you, and I'd think by now you'd be starting to see that you'd be better off listening to me.

the record on Politics is no fluke. I don't say shit just to hear myself talk. I only post when I know I'm right.

I was a waiter, but I got fired. I told someone that only half ate their steak "people are starving in China." I hated the adults- kids were okay.

How early is too early to teach kids about batshit crazy strangers? Wife was putting the smaller kid in the car yesterday outside Starbucks, and turned around to see a batshit crazy stranger -- y'know, the sort of person with mental problems which are obvious to the untrained and which would have resulted in her institutionalization until the reformers started to get their way in the late 80s -- talking and gesticulating wildly to the older (3.5 yrs) one there on the sidewalk. Hard to tell what he (the older one) thinks of all this. Hard to know how much you can tell him.

Incidentally, no tantrums were involved.

Well of course no tantrums were involved. They got their daily Starbucks fix.

Ok, I'll go back to the FB now.

I don't know if it's living in New York or what, but the Weedlet (almost 4) seems to be able to sense the difference between kindly stranger and mental case. She just sort of smiles indulgently and gives the wackos a wide berth without making eye contact (I am so proud). All we tell her is that she shouldn't talk to strangers, and beyond "hi" and "bye" and "thank you" to the nice ones, she doesn't.

By the way, you might consider steering clear of that Starbucks if Fringey's hanging out in front on a regular basis.

Once the need for an explanation is inevitable, I prefer not to put it off - otherwise, they are trying to make sense of a world that doesn't make sense, because they are missing key information, and I think that is more frightening to them. If you don't explain the loon (see, tying threads!), the kid will be wondering, "gee, will I grow up like that", or "is that what happens if I don't eat my peas" or even "that guy is sort of like my Daddy after he's been drinking that frothy stuff; I wonder if Daddy will end up like that all the time." Far better that instead that the little guy understand, "OK, now I know what a Republican looks like."

degradation -- I'm no GOPer
 

Republican? Damn, G3, I've never degraded you. Why the escalation?

For what it is worth
 

degradation -- I'm no GOPer
 

I never thought you were the batshit crazy stranger. The talking to kids think just didn't sound like you.

Switching Topics...,
 

Getting desperate to come up with a girl name before baby is born sometime this month. Anyone willing to post some of their favorites? Our two boys have relatively eclectic names - enough so that posting them could "out" me, but I bring it up to let you know that we're not looking for Emily, Hannah, Madison or Kaitlin (NTTAWThoseNames). At the same time, we're also probably not going to go with "Apple" or any other fruit or vegetable for that matter.

So, off the beaten path names that aren't totally loony?

Switching Topics...,
 

Isabella, Esme, Hildegard, Demetra, Eloise, Marina, Elena.

Electra, Gaia, Clementine, Adelphia, Anatolia, Cherisa, Hermione.

Alessandra, Livia, and, my favorite, Boudicca.

Switching Topics...,
 

I always liked "Maureen" and I think it's been out of fashion long enough to be off the beaten path, but it may be too ethnicity-specific.

Switching Topics...,
 

I won't give you names we've actually used/are considering, as that would be outable, but I personally hold deep love for:

Esmé (French for "esteemed" or "loved")
Niamh (pronounced "Neeve"; one syllable) (Irish for "light")
Nora (prob. from Latin for "honor" or "light")
Moira/Maura (Irish for "the great")

I recommend against "Semaj" for the reasons stated on the FB.

ETA: Apparently I should marry G3.

Switching Topics...,
 

Hoa- Vietnamese for peaceful flower pronounced hu-ah
Hana - Japanese pronounced Ha-na almost Hannah

Switching Topics...,
 

if Gilligan has only gone another season I'm sure there'd be a great response to this......

Spraypaint
 

Heh. "Trying out situations"? Usually we're just fixin to buy shit or feed ourselves, not experiment with the tolerance levels of 2 year olds (NTTAWWT). It's tempting to explain an annoying disturbance by blaming someone for it (i.e., the parent knew, or should have reasonably known, the child would freak, like the old intentional or wilful misconduct thing.) Usually, it has just happened through no fault of anyone. Anyhow, my kid is just exercising her freedom of speech. As they say, the remedy aint to shut her up, but rather "more speech" so I guess that means you can throw a yelling screaming hissy as well. Hijinks ensue!!!

Unless my child's crying is causing someone's hair (i.e., mine), or the actual building, to catch fire, I'm going to go ahead and pay for the two cartloads of groceries it's taken me 2 1/2 hours to gather thank you. Exit stragegy? That's gonna be your exit and your strategy, chicky. I'm staying put with my busload of groceries and apopletic kid. Anyhow, it's more practical for you to leave since you're only buying a pack of cigs, a coupla low carb items, condoms (NTTAWWT), overpriced anti-humectant hair lotion, and flavored coffee.

Actually, you HAVE, by frequenting a place where children are not banned.

Sounds fair to me. But that would also mean I can call you fat and that it bothers me and I wish you'd keep your largesse at home.

Now.....the bitter reality is you're going to have to just deal with my large horde of screaming, foreign born kids, and you and the rest of this great country's childless, nonhomeowners should just go ahead and keep chocking up that 25% of your paycheck to fund my brood's public schooling and other assorted public assistances.

Oh Beautiful For Gracious Skies!!!!

Switching Topics...,
 

I love this name, but it is at least as common lately as all those other names put together.

Spraypaint
 

oh, sweetie, why did you not scroll then post? "Given that it was Ty and bnb, and perhaps Atticus, with whom I was screwing around, I didn't think one of them would be that silly. I would not have responded in that way to, say, vietmom or even SAM."

I have deleted my bitchy mean fuck-with-your-kid response.

I will note that I have absolutely no problem with paying taxes, particularly to make education, child care (day care, sick kid day care, etc), health care better, and, jesus fucking christ, what is the relevance of where the damn kid was born? I have not noticed that foreign-born, american-raised children are brattier or anything. Nice of you to import all of those things into my relatively simple "I hate bratty kids" argument. If there were more and better child care options, fewer parents would be forced to bring their kids to, e.g., the DMV with them, a situation which is pretty much always going to result in a total meltdown.

Spraypaint
 

I would advocate for more and better DMV options first. I'm a giver.

Spraypaint
 

I am jealous that Atticus is posting from the future. Where I am, it won't be 5:06 PDT for another 40 minutes or so. If the markets weren't closed, we could get rich off of this.

eta: Gadzooks! I'm in the future, too. Now I'm going to have to hurry to get home to see my kids before bedtime!

Spraypaint
 

Funny thing is, I'd bet 10 dinners seated next to me and my kids at 3 there'd be fewer incidents than 10 dinners seated next to Fringe's table. don't you have that feeling?

Spraypaint
 

That is so inefficient. The DMV thing was an "e.g." And you, unlike people who don't post on frivolous boards, are not exempt.

On a side note, while I am not really fat, my feet have gotten all fucked up I think from some shoes I wore. They are swollen on the top between my toes and my ankles. So I guess vietmom could call me "fat feet."

Aren't swollen feet a sign of pregnancy? Me, with child? Oh the humanity! Plus, it seems unfair that a holy immaculate conception have all the downsides of a regular pregnancy.

Spraypaint
 

Oh, sweetie, why don't you sign-post your bitchy mean fuck-with-your-kid responses so that we don't have to read your mind and get all upset for no reason when it turns out that you didn't mean MY kid.

Thank goodness Friday is almost over

Spraypaint
 

Fat feet.

Anyhow, I've got "cankles" so bad I'm ashamed to even go to the FB.

So what's up with acting all attacked by my post? Just some hyperbole (albeit bad). I thought throwing in the "missy!" would clarify my post was not really serious. And chill with the foreign-born kid thing I "injected" into the argument. It just sounded more ironic the idea of someone importing large amounts of children faster than one could actually birth them, doubling the amount of supermarket screaming (possibly in several languages) around the already frustrated ltl/fb who, ironically, is paying for the increasing brood and screaming with her tax dollars. Okay so whatever, maybe it wasn't funny.

I'm proof that non-preggos can experience the joyful downsides of "regular pregnancy". Adopted my kiddo yet a year later I've got a poochy belly, stretch marks, zero sex drive, a carb addiction and wider hips. I've actually seen Dads get these downsides after becoming parents too, except of course for the zero sex drive part.

I like that you post here without kids. Just to be goofy though, one of y'all who is also on the FB should declare a "Parent's Day" on the FB and we can torture all the hipsters with our bourgeois concerns.

Switching Topics...,
 

OK, skip Isabella. Call her "Fringie".

Switching Topics...,
 

Interesting. Viet Babe was born in Hoa Binh. Vietnamese names can be rough. A friend's boy is "Phuc", unfortunately pronounced as you'd suspect.

For Oscar looking for different names that aren't loony:

Well, how about Linh which sounds American but is Vietnamese? Here are some favorite names of mine:

Gioia (pronounced "Joyuh" with a hard "J", not spanish sounding like Hoya). My favorite name!

Bridget (very Irish)

Mai (pronounced "My")

Mei (pronounced May)

Abrianna (Hebrew)

Aviana (Native American)

Bronwyn (Welsh)

Esta or Sofia (Italian)

Have fun!

Spraypaint
 

Hm. I was thinking that the foreign-born kids would have learned English like good little americans. If they scream in foreign languages, they are out toot sweet.

HOA
 

Re Hoa - the first thing I though of was "Homeowners' Association." Can you tell I do real estate?

Re - pregnancy aftermath. Even though I think I'm about down to what I was BC (before child), I have come to the conclusion that I'm just not going to have the same shape back ever again. At least it was worth it.

During pregnancy my feet swelled so bad I couldn't wear shoes - even those I had bought two sizes bigger. It was horrible and painful as well as oh-so-unattractive. Turns out I was retaining like 30lbs of water. Ewww.

Spraypaint
 

F., you are devious. Way to break up the parent unified F'you that you had confronted.
i agree a child crying in Farsi should be carried out of the restaurant- carried by the towel atticus. a child crying in spanish thrown back across the river, etc..

Switching Topics...,
 

Alanna
Arianna
Audrey
Cara or Carina
Ella (although with the recent movie, this may become commonplace)
Hayley
Katrina or Katarina
Mielle
Noemi
Serena
Tatiana
Tristan
Valarie


Let us know what you decide to name her! Congratulations!

Boudicca
 

Just to advocate for my favorite name on the list here, Boudicca led a rebellion of a tribe of Britons against Rome back in the first century, and was likely a quasi-religious tribal leader in a tribe where women played a much greater role than men. By legend, she was very tall with shockingly red hair. Pretty cool name-sake, if you ask me.

Baby names
 

OscarCrease, PM me if you want some serious advice. I actually do name-consulting as seriously as people will let me. If you give me a little more information, I'll be able to come up with a list of quirky-but-not-weird and different-but-not-huh?-inspiring names.

tm

Boudicca
 

if its a boy, rufus leeking is nice.

The Processional
 

A week or so ago, the oldest Gaplet graduated.

(From preschool).

When I heard about the graduation ceremony, I idly wondered about how seriously people take this -- it's preschool, for God's sake -- and whether I should make a special effort to get away from work in time to attend. The glint in the SO's piercing stare suggested that I make the time just to be safe, and so I did.

Before the ceremony, a friend explained to me that there'll be singing, dancing, and then the processional to receive "Diplomas," during which the audience will see a slide show of the child, coupled with a voice-over about how "Timmy loves trucks, and does a great show and tell!" I would think that this event was the silliest thing created, until it's my child's turn, at which point I'll get all misty.

He was right, damn him.

Afterwards, the friend mentioned to me that this was pretty much the peak of graduation ceremonies. Future ceremonies -- for sixth grade, or HS, or college, etc -- simply don't compare in terms of personal attention. Somehow, "All BSEE grads please stand" lacks the same emotional punch. Had I known that, I'd have ditched the Sony Camcorder and just hired the professional film team this time 'round.

So, preschooler moms and dads, be forewarned. And bilmore, please confirm how this kid of ceremony compares to seeing your kid get his doctorate. Or, emerge from Thistledew Camp, either one.

Gattigap

The Processional
 

I could have told you this from when I was a child. We made our own mortarboards out of construction paper for the ceremony. Probably still have mine in my closet at home. I think I'm still paying on the nursery school loans, too.

The Processional
 

'pends on the degree. At my undergraduate school, the degrees were conferred en masse by school and then by level of degree --- so there were buttloads of people standing when it came time to confer the BAs from the School of Arts and Sciences, as you say. When they did the LS, they had all the newly minted JDs stand up to polite applause, and then the handful of LL.M.s (same response), and then its one S.J.D. recipient --- a guy who'd been in law school for like a bagillion years. When he stood up, the entire law school erupted in cheers and Arsenio hoot-hoot-hooting (this was the early '90s, mind you). Because all the JDs were cheering, the rest of us figured this guy must have been some kind of legal stud-boy, and began cheering also, almost a standing O. Probably the best day that guy had ever had the entire decade. He might have even gotten laid that night for the first time ever.

Of course, if I had realized then exactly how much of a wank-off an S.J.D. is, or even how little one can trust a newly-minted JD's choice of idols, I would have cheered somewhat less for him.

The Processional
 

You know, whatever one does in the pursuit of knowledge, or perchance in a veritable marathon of studying, does not give others opportunity for derision. There is, or at least should be, something more to one's studies than simply stocking a tool box. It's a profession for goodness sakes. So those of us who take to it fully and embrace its nuances are wank-offs? If so, pass me the vaseline.

I almost posted this anon. but decided to post open so as not to imply there is actually something to hide in possesing the degree.

The Processional
 

You can make kids get those instead of paying for it yourself? Whooo-hooo!

Oh, and

Hank had an SJD! Hank has an SJD! Na-na-na-na-Na-na!

The Processional
 

Well, I'd call you Professor, but, you know, the successful law professors tend to have a dozen articles published by the time the SJDs get their degree.

http://www.lggwg.com/wolff/gilligan.gif

(That's Hank on his knees. And that's me between dtb and ncs.)

The Processional
 

Cute bag. I love the flowers, and it goes with your hat nicely.

Spraypaint
 

I do NOT have stretch marks, Damn you!

S_A_M