Bad Dad
 

Aren't these just scams 90% of the time? Like, "here's a modeling contract", now come in and we'll put together a portfolio of photos for $1000. And we'll call agents for another $500 and so on.

Bad Dad
 

Yes, they usually are, but this one was not. We were approached by the actual company that wanted her in the ads. They sicked their ad agency on us, which is a reputable ad agency, or at least an ad agency that is as reputable as they come, not a modeling agency. So there would have been a check coming to us from this, not the other way around. But it is exactly PJ's point that led us to say no.

Bad Dad
 

big time modeling seems scary, there's that documentary made by one of the 70's teen models with Brooke Shields and all the others. But I know one girl who did local department store newspaper type stuff, not high glamour-you've gained a pound stuff, and she was okay.

BTW, how did I create a whole new thread over here -- I didn't mean to do that?

Bad Dad
 

Oh well, I thought there was an easier way out than anorexia. To wit, "honey, that's just a scam artist."

Bad Dad
 

Hmmm. Maybe I can work it in. Thanks.

Bad Dad
 

Yeah, that'll help her self esteem. And when boys start calling, you can also tell her, "honey, they don't really like you, they just want sex."

Bad Dad
 

Hey, if G3 wants his daughter to slut around, he can take your approach. I'm just proposing he introduce her quickly to how guys are.

"But of course you're beautiful--that's why he figured the scam would work."

Not exactly related, but...
 

Yesterday was kind of chilly here in TCOTU, so on the way out the door, I told my son to put on his warm coat, as it was cold outside. His warm coat is "puffy" (I don't think it's down, but you know what I mean -- like a down coat -- whatever.)

Anyway, he puts it on, and to my absolute horror, has this saddish look on his face and says, "I don't want to wear this -- I look fat in it...." :eek:

He's only FIVE!!!!

And (not that this really matters, I don't think), if anything, he's a little underweight (not malnourished or anything, but probably below the 50th percentile for his height.)

I have no idea where he got this, and has NEVER said anything about being fat, or thin, or anything like it. I suppose when I was pregnant, I would complain about being fat, but I haven't said anything like that in about a year.

We talk about nutrition when explaining why (for example) he can't have french fries every day -- I never say it's because "he'll get fat" nor do I EVER bring up the subject of weight with him. It never occurred to me that he would even be thinking about it.

I am distressed.

Scary sometimes
 

It's scary how quickly societal attitudes get imposed on kids. We have a toddler who was trying to recite the differences between men and women the other day, and included, "waiters talk to men and bring them the bill..." It is very hard to escape the biases out there.

We, of course, explained that waiters are behaving like sexist pigs ...

Bad Dad
 

Oh yeah, that's exactly what Nicollette Sheridan told her mom in "Paper Dolls" before she became a debauched teenage cokehead, and don't even get me started on what happened when those NYC vultures got their hands on Tootie in "Facts of Life" and started dressing her all provocatively before Mrs. Garrett stepped in to save her...

Bad Dad
 

I'll second this. If you approach it as a fun thing to do once, it's one thing. It's quite another to say that this is what she's going to do with her life. I knew a girl growing up who occasionally did some modeling work - she'd show up in local ads, or in fashion spreads in the local paper, but it wasn't a big deal for her. She had an agent who gave people her head shots, and sometimes something came up. She seemed pretty normal. College, business degree, works in marketing for a small company, etc. There was another girl who was moderately more frequently in such things whose mother seemed obsessed. She ended up pretty screwed up. Baby at 17, etc.

So I don't think modelling is nearly so important as how the parents approach it.

Personally, I'm a little disappointed in the baltspawn - by the time the Olsen twins were their age, they were making like $250k a year. The baltspawn have never brought in a dime.

Fat
 

On the flipside from GGG's comment, remember that "I look fat in this" may mean something very different in the 5-yr old's mouth from what it means in your ears. I remember one of my kids around that age describing a well-loved family member as "fat" without a trace of negative connotation; it was just a description. We had to explain the concept of sensitivity about one's body image.

In your case, it sounds as though your son does have a negative association with "looking fat," but that doesn't necessarily mean he's absorbed the whole range of American social stigma that ties into that phrase. Possibly he just heard someone once wondering if "I look fat in this" and picked it up as a concern people have about clothing.

Anyhow, he's got a long time to learn about social attitudes and form his own opinions, and a good teacher at hand.

Fat
 

Perhaps he was saying "I look phat" because he was wearing a Triple F.A.T. Goose jacket.

Bad Dad
 

There's got to be a good children's book about this for 10-year-olds. Maybe Madonna can do that one next.