Caption Contest
 

And when a doctor tells you there's a pretty good chance you've got a rare bad cancer, remember I told you this: Right now, nothing will seem as utterly senseless and worthless as organized religion.

Caption Contest
 

Dear, I'm trying to start a fight. I don't have time to sort this out. Give me a straight link, or summary. Is notbob doing a "Bush will start a draft" or is there something to a ban on hotel movies?

Caption Contest
 

What do you have now that you want Tomorrow?

Caption Contest
 

I hope you're not wishing me a cancer. First because spacefuck wished someone dead here, then there was a big fight, then Penske left. More importantly, wishing a cancer on someone is a venal sin. When you do come back to the Church, alone shivering in the ER, wondering if the kids will bother to visit, and then realizing there'll likely be no time, and that you'll have to race to even get the rosary in before you kick, not in full grace due to this obscene wish you threw my way today.

Caption Contest
 

Nothing. Thats it. Game's up. So people like you do what people who don't like rules do - they invent new rules.

Death is permanent and definite, without exception. No appeals, no loopholes. So people like you who couldn't handle that reality made up a fiction to get around the rules.

What really makes you NEED religion? Its not some innate need to be spiritual. Its not some innate need to be moral. You can do both of those secularly. You need an escape valve from the one thing you can't get around. You know it, I know it. Why bullshit around it?

Caption Contest
 

And yet I got the "you pervert!" message from my firm's filter. I can go to the Frontline site by editing the address, but I can't get to the summary of that episode.

I'd be worried but for the fact that I own this place. Although I should probably increase the Skittles and Mountain Dew budget for the IT people. Again.

Caption Contest
 

Venal = misdemeanor. I think you meant to reference the felony level "mortal" sin there.

You're a freak, you know that.

Caption Contest
 

Yes.

Administration wages war on pornography
Obscenity: For the first time in 10 years, the U.S. government is spending millions to file charges across the country.

• In this field office in Washington, 32 prosecutors, investigators and a handful of FBI agents are spending millions of dollars to bring anti-obscenity cases to courthouses across the country for the first time in 10 years. Nothing is off limits, they warn, even soft-core cable programs such as HBO's long-running Real Sex or the adult movies widely offered in guestrooms of major hotel chains.

Caption Contest
 

Of course I know theat. But look at you; despite the bluster, the part of you that was taught to spread God's word and rules still shines from somewhere within. QED

78-4

Caption Contest
 

You just bought my vote. Some things are more precious than tax breaks. Come on, Mr. Longface! Whip the fucking chimpanzee.

Caption Contest
 

I also remember my fraternity's secret handshake.

Caption Contest
 

BTW, when did you get Jeb to start counting your votes?

Caption Contest
 

RT, I think your message might be an effective vote getter on certain websites.

Caption Contest
 

How about this? From the Journal of the American Family Association http://afajournal.org/2003/october/1003noi.asp ...

• PORNOGRAPHY
  Marriott ignores parents whose children are exposed to porn
  Anne Marie Miele and her husband thought they had found a suitable pay-per-view movie for their children one night while staying at a Marriott hotel. Instead, about an hour into the film, they got a shocking switch from a family movie into a hardcore porn film.
  
  The Mieles also got something else: the cold shoulder from Marriott officials not concerned enough even to talk to the family. In a letter to AFA, Miele expressed her dismay with Marriott officials and their lack of interest about the situation.
  
  However, while Marriott might have ignored Miele, they quickly acknowledged the thousands of e-mail complaints with which they were deluged by OneMillionMoms.com (OMM) and OneMillionDads.com (OMD) members. Company spokesman Tom Cooper demanded OMD stop delivering e-mails to Marriott corporate executives or face legal action.
  
  [here's the money quote, Hank and Club:]"My response to his threat was simple," said AFA Chairman Don Wildmon. "Until Marriott gets out of the porn business, OMD will continue its campaign of educating and warning families. If Marriott chooses to take legal action, we are ready and willing to make it something that the national media will take notice of. This way, the whole nation will learn that Marriott makes millions from pornography."
  
  The Mieles were staying at the Marriott Fallsview in Niagara Falls, Canada, after attending a Christian music festival outside Buffalo, New York. Anne Marie told AFA she and her husband searched the channels to find something suitable for their children to watch, finally finding a pay-per-view children’s movie.
  
  "We were all enjoying the film when about an hour into it, the screen instantly changed to hardcore pornography," Miele said. "I was shocked and immediately jumped up and covered the screen while my husband frantically fumbled for the remote."
  
  The Mieles were initially told the problem was not the hotel’s, but that of the outside company from which the hotel receives its pay-per-view feed. Multiple requests to speak to hotel management were denied as the hotel management refused to speak with the Mieles.
  
  Contact
  Marriott International, Inc.
  Chairman J. W. (Bill) Marriott Jr.
  One Marriott Drive
  Washington, D.C. 20058
  Phone: 301-380-3000
  TOLL-FREE: 1-800-535-4028
  E-mail: GuestRelations@marriott.com
  

(emphasis supplied)

Caption Contest
 

Could be a disqualifier in more ways than one, I'd imagine. Think of the flaws in Brendan Fraser's wishes from Bedazzled.

Note to Sebby: Wish for a "proportional" 15 inch cock. There are probably few things more useless than a 15 inch pencil.