Avatar advice
 

I'm new so maybe I've no standing to say this but, I think mmm Burger needs a different avatar. Here's why: the moniker mmm Burger CJ is a real creative twist, playing off the simpsons and the judge equally- you've all grown used to it, but remember when you first saw it-it was great. and its the equal parts twist that makes it. his avatar throws the balance off, favoring the homer side. now, avatar fashion is something we are all new to, but I think the moniker would work better with something more subtle.

Bridezilla
 

How about 33 $10 books of McDonald's Bucks? The caterer would be honored to be paid in currency bearing his own likeness.

Avatar advice - zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
 

Well, if you could morph the CJs robes onto Homer's head, or vice versa, would that be more acceptable to you?

Bridezilla
 

Do they still sell Dale Earnhardt dollars at Hardees down in South Caroilina??

Gift?
 

My 18 year old cousin knocked up his 17 year old girlfriend when he came home from his freshman year of college at winter break. She graduated from high school a month ago.

I got an invitation for a reception on Saturday to "Welcome Girlfriend to the Family." I assume that a wedding has either happened or will happen in the very near future.

I have absolutely no details on whether my cousin's moving back to town to raise his child or if his bride is moving out of state to live in the couples housing. I'm sort of assuming the former, though I can see his family taking on some of the child rearing duties so he can continue with his education. (The bride has been living with my cousin's family since she got kicked out of her house upon the announcement of the pregnancy. The groom's mother is a soft hearted soul that I can see getting roped into child rearing.) I can call my cousin's grandmother for these details, and I'm certain that she'll be happy to gossip about the whole affair, but I'm not sure if she'll have the type of answer that I'm looking for.

My question: Does one bring a gift to a shotgun type wedding reception? If so, what sort of gift?

Gift?
 

I have no experience with this, thankfully. And I suspect Emily Post has no insight, either.

But I would think a gift is appropriate, because it is a wedding reception and because your cousin is doing the right thing.

And I would think something eminently practical: money, a gift certificate to a department store, or clothes for the kid. As opposed, say, to crystal or artsy candlesticks.

Bridezilla
 

Anyone see the episode of True Life on MTV that showed three couples planning their wedding? Very entertaining. My favorite was the couple from Brooklyn. The groom made a comment to the camera at one point that all the guests owed him a gift or cash in excess of the amount he was paying per person for the Reception. Other fun scenes included the groom going off on the limo driver and the bride trying to balance her tanning salon appointments and her peeling chest.

They did not break even.


Edited to correct the name of the show.

MNF Cheesecake
 

True, she would be more like the down and dirty fetish sexxxy type. Yum!

Avatar advice - zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
 

Anyone who has a better avatar for me is welcome to use PM. Myself, I prefer to waste time reading about bridezillas than search for a picture of the real Warren Burger eating a burger or something like that.

Gift?
 

I'm with Sidd on this, since Cuz is doing the right thing, it would be appropriate to bring a gift that they will need, but cannot afford. Like diaper service or some shit like that. However, you said it was a "welcome girlfriend to the family" party. If the wedding has not yet happened, then present is appropriate at that time. Maybe a token gift if this is just a party to introduce her to people.

Gift?
 

OF COURSE ONE BRINGS A GIFT! Why do you think they invited rich attorney cousin?

I would suggest a negotiable instrument for a gift. Along with that, you could give the couple engraved plastic champagne flutes (yes, they do engrave plastic) so they get a box. This is very popular on the trailer trash side of my family (fyi, really, truly, they are, and I've got the plastic flutes to prove it).

Alternatively, I'd recommend standard shotgun wedding protection gear: flak jacket and condoms.

Bridezilla
 

Hey, now we're talking. I like the cut of this fellow's jib. This young buck has style, panache. You other simpletons would do well to emulate him. If it were not for the fact that the entire post is the least accurate thing written on any internet message board in the whole cyber-universe since the beginning of virtual time, I would nominate it for Post of the Late Morning (PST). (Inaccurate, that is, except for the narcissistic part. And the part about me being hot shit. And the part about me having a teeny tiny package.)

Oh wait, I forgot that we do not flame each other anymore. We engage in polite but heartfelt disputes about who should be voted off For Love or Money. Sorry str8, you're a bit l8 with the flaming schtick. Try the politics board - it never seems to go out of style over there. And pick me up a Mojito while your at it.

Bridezilla
 

Yes, we do. Ass.

Bridezilla
 

That's "you're" not "your". Please spend some time on the language board.

Gift?
 

Condoms - so that there's not a repeat of the first fuck-up that caused the whole mess - literally.