Puffy Nipples, Porn Stars, Etc...
 

Less,

I know what puffy nipples look like - I'm just confused as to why you'd find them attractive. They look like a work in progress - like they're not finished yet.

S(Are you subconsciously outing your pedophilic leanings?)D

Puffy Nipples, Porn Stars, Etc...
 

I can't explain it. I like them. I also like little rock hard, cut glass, brown nipples. The only nipples I don't really like are pancake sized, and the nipple never really gets hard, and the aureola is shaped more like Antartica than the moon.

FB Love?
 

Anyone remember Lawn Chair Larry, the guy who attached several dozen weather balloons to his "extremely comfortable lawn chair" and wound up at 16,000 feet above Long Beach? He brought himself down by shooting down the balloons, but got entangled in power lines. Here's the link.

http://www.darwinawards.com/stupid/stupid1997-11.html

My favorite part: "We know he broke some part of the Federal Aviation Act, and as soon as we decide which part it is, a charge will be filed."

FB Love?
 

I note he was drinking Miller Lite. That has to mean something.

Fly fly away
 

Leagl,

if you want to bug TM, make this post your avatar.

And on a totally unrelated note, don't you hate when someobody calls you every ten seconds when they have already left you a voicemail like five minutes earlier that you didn't have a chance to return? This is the kind of thing that would push a return phone call from first on my laundry list to last. Such annoying lawyer behavior should not go rewarded.

Holdem
 

To all you nascent hold'em players out there.

Good ways to learn holdem are to play in low-limit games. In California, poker rooms are legal and hold'em is king. 3-6 hold'em is a nice friendly game where $200 can last you a very long time, especially if you play at all tight. When you're starting out, tighter is better. However, tighter also means being bored for long stretches of time waiting for a playable hand, which some people are unable to do.

There comes a time in every hold'em player's career where he or she thinks, "hey, I can make some good money playing these trashy suited cards." The sooner you get over that phase, the better off you'll be. Playing hands like Q-4 suited or 10-6 suited will get you broke in a big hurry. Even hands like 9-8 suited only play well with at least 3 other callers. Otherwise you're not getting good enough odds to justify your call.

To say hold'em is addictive is an understatement. If you have an addictive personality, stay away. And don't even think about signing up for one of those online poker rooms, unless you're sure that you can handle it. That said, it is a hell of a good time.

Str(bet bet bet bet bet)8

So THIS is what's wrong with you grumpy people
 

grumpy bear people
Record rain prolongs SAD symptoms
Many in East suffering from winter blues
— in summer
June 26 — After two months of gloomy, sodden days, Kristina Goodnough was frazzled and frustrated. The all too familiar feelings of irritability, depression and lethargy that usually plague Goodnough throughout the winter didn’t lift, as they normally do, when spring came. “If the weather doesn’t turn around, I’m going to snap,” says the 53-year-old resident of West Hartford, Conn.
GOODNOUGH SUFFERS from “winter blues,” a mild form of Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD. Both SAD and winter blues are a hibernation-like response to shorter days, experts say.
“A person with SAD is like a bear that’s been wakened out of hibernation,” says Dr. Martin Rosenzweig, a clinical associate in psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia. “You’d expect him to be hungry, grumpy and out of sorts — not very functional and you wouldn’t want to mess with him.”
Doctors often advise people who have either form of the disorder to spend more time in the sun and to invest in a light box, a device that provides bright light to supplement the shorter rays of winter.

:umbrella:

How does it feel?

Puffy Nipples, Porn Stars, Etc...
 

I'd rank them by order of preference as follows:

Color:
1. Brown
2. Dark pink
3. Light pink
4. Almost translucnet pink

Diameter:
1. Slightly wider than a silver dollar
2. Silver dollar
3. Smaller than silver dollar
4. Antartica

Areola:
1. Smooth
2. Minor "bumps"
3. Puffy (sorry, we agree to disagree on this)

Situation:
1. Pointing outward at slight upward angle
2. Pointing straight outward
3. Pointing slightly down
4. Pointing down

S(I think that covers all possible characteristics, Less)D

Fly fly away
 

Mom always said "Don't have pop rocks & Coke before you get on an airplane if you're boobs are fake."

Puffy Nipples, Porn Stars, Etc...
 

"Rosebud."

-Charles Foster Kane

Puffy Nipples, Porn Stars, Etc...
 

You completely forgot to discuss hardness. And inversion versus pencil erasers.

Fly fly away
 

Yes. When someone does that I resolve not to answer my phone for any of the multiple calls. If it is a freakin emergency, you better let me know in your voicemail and be done with it.

I recently worked on a deal with an attorney who talked incessently and pulled the call-back shit. He would leave 5 minute voicemails, that I eventually stopped listening to. When I would return his calls (when I was good and ready), I would say "I saw you called, what's up?" Thus allowing me to skip the voicemails all together. I would then have to cut off his ramblings continually during the phone call in order to ever have a hope of getting off the phone.

Fly fly away
 

I like to respond to calls with an e-mail - something like "You called, what the fuck can I do for you?" People who know me have now come to learn that response time is faster if I neither have to see you nor hear your voice.

edited to say that someone in my office just inter-officed me and let the thing ring forever while I was meeting with someone. I finally picked up the line and said "did your mother ever teach you what rude is?" He was all shocked and claimed that his phone said "Holding for ThrashersFan" and he did not realize that it kept on ringing in my office. What a dumb fuck -- he has been here for like 5 fucking years now and he doesn't know how the phones work. :mad:

Holdem
 

I know what you are saying. Thanks for the insights. My SO and I noticed that occasionally something randomly good can happen with shit cards (for example, I would have had a straight by holding a 2 and a 4 one time), but just like blackjack, you gotta stay with the odds. Know any good books on the subject? Positively 5th Street is on my reading list, but I'd also like some game theory/odds instructions.

Why Insurance Law Can Be Interesting
 

A recent Judge Posner opinion begins:

"John Veysey appeals from his conviction, after a jury trial, and sentence of 110 years in prison for mail and wire fraud, arson, and the related offense of felony by fire. The facts are amazing, but we shall resist the temptation to recount them at length. In 1991 Veysey set fire to his house and inflated the claim that he then filed with his insurer. The insurer paid, and the house was rebuilt. The following year Veysey married a woman named Kemp, increased the insurance on the house, removed the valuable contents of the house, along with himself and his wife, and then cut the natural-gas line inside the house, causing the house to fill up with gas and explode spectacularly, utterly destroying it. He grossly exaggerated the value of the property allegedly lost in the explosion--some did not exist and some he had removed before the explosion. The insurance company (a different one) paid, and he used part of the proceeds to buy another house. The next year he tried to kill his wife by driving his van with her in it into a river. When that failed he killed her by poisoning her, and collected $200,000 in the proceeds of insurance policies on her life. He placed personal ads in newspapers, seeking to meet women. He became engaged to one of the women he met through his ads, named Donner, but broke his engagement after failing to procure a $1 million policy on her life. He then took up with a Ms. Beetle. This was in 1996 and the same year he burned down his house, again submitting an inflated estimate of the loss and receiving substantial proceeds from the insurance company (a different one, again). He then married Beetle, and they moved into a rented house. She insured her life for $500,000 with him as beneficiary. One night in 1998, after drugging her, he set fire to the house, hoping to kill both her and their infant son, on whom he had also taken out a life insurance policy and who was in the house with her. They were rescued, and soon afterwards Veysey and Beetle divorced. The house was rebuilt and Veysey persuaded a woman named Hilkin to move in with him after she had accumulated some $700,000 in life insurance and named him as the primary beneficiary. He apparently intended to murder her, but he was arrested before his plans matured. There is more, but these are the highlights."

http://www.ca7.uscourts.gov/op3.fwx?...no=01-4208.PDF