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Flinty_McFlint 08-12-2005 12:03 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Spanky
Number one assumed she doesn't like me. But she is so shy she just can't tell it. Please pay attention.
I'm sorry. My bad. There so many topics ripe for mocking on this site that I don't know how I keep up sometimes. It's a tough job, you understand.

sebastian_dangerfield 08-12-2005 12:19 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Spanky
This is just ridiculous:

I think your response for my quest for intelligent input sheds a great deal more light on your personal issues than it does on my relationship with the Serbian. Although from other peoples responses, it seems people have been trying to warn me about this.
Dude, you have NO relationship with the Serbian. I have more of a relationship with the people behind the counter at my dry cleaner. You have a better chance of fucking your plumber than you do the Serbian.

You are card carrying, 400%, off the cliff, looney tunes delusional. I love ya for it - you're the gift these boards have needed for months. But your elevator is not just missing a few floors - the car is not even in the goddamned shaft.

NotFromHere 08-12-2005 12:23 PM
sorry
 
Dear People of Lawtalkers,
I am sorry for what I have done to the BB. I posted a law related article about sloppy service of process. And it's turned into this, whatever it is now. This is my fault. Forgive me.

NFH
:(

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 12:26 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Dude, you have NO relationship with the Serbian. I have more of a relationship with the people behind the counter at my dry cleaner. You have a better chance of fucking your plumber than you do the Serbian.

You are card carrying, 400%, off the cliff, looney tunes delusional. I love ya for it - you're the gift these boards have needed for months. But your elevator is not just missing a few floors - the car is not even in the goddamned shaft.
What personal issues do you have that forced you to write these mean mean words to Spanky???

Shape Shifter 08-12-2005 12:46 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
Again with the movie thing. I think the wooing with poetry was more important back when you weren't allowed to spend any time with the opposite sex and courtship was conducted by letter and shit.

Any guy who does anything poetry-y to me is moved to "no" pretty much instantaneously. It's creepy and contrived.

However, to me, wooing occurs on the move from "hey, we like each other!" to something more relationshippy -- like, "let's spend the rest of our lives together -- wouldn't I make a great mate?" or "I would like you to stop dating/fucking other people." And that's after the liking part is established.

Like, I basically on some level like the people who populate the noirish aspect of my life, but I would need to be wooed into dating them, or giving all but one of them up. Not that any of them are asking for that, never fear.
Pretty women out walking with gorillas down my street
From my window I'm staring while my coffee grows cold
Look over there! Where?
There's a lady that I used to know
She's married now or engaged or something
so I am told

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 01:51 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Pretty women out walking with gorillas down my street
From my window I'm staring while my coffee grows cold
Look over there! Where?
There's a lady that I used to know
She's married now or engaged or something
so I am told
Sweetness, you were safe even w/o the poetry. I ceded you to dtb a long time ago.

NotFromHere 08-12-2005 02:00 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
Sweetness, you were safe even w/o the poetry. I ceded you to dtb a long time ago.
Not like you to just give up like that.

And now, for the second day in a row I have Joe Jackson running through my mental soundtrack.
Thanks Lizard. You bastard.

I guess it's better than Gwen Stephani.

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 02:04 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by NotFromHere
Not like you to just give up like that.

And now, for the second day in a row I have Joe Jackson running through my mental soundtrack.
Thanks Lizard. You bastard.

I guess it's better than Gwen Stephani.
Always something breaking us in two?

I easily give up things I don't want.

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 02:06 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
Geez. You guys just want to see the trainwreck. You see the two trains on the same tracks, rushing toward each other, and you encourage them to drive on!!! Just so you can explore the carnage.

I admire you. Even I, unsympathetic to widows, orphans and the terminally ill, can't bring myself to do that. Nor can Pretty "heart of coal" Lady, apparently.
Not 2. I think Spanky makes a salient point that it is a woman's perogative to change her mind. I know I have. Besides, you only live once and he is really into this fascinating, wordly stripper waitiress/ aspiring missed the boat model. Why should he risk dying alone when he could just roll the dice on a couple of phone calls or pop-ins? Otherwise he might be just as miserable and bitter as you. At least he can die saying he tried.

dtb 08-12-2005 02:07 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
Always something breaking us in two?

I easily give up things I don't want.
Your loss/my gain, etc.

You're a peach, fringe.

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 02:09 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Spanky
What happen to you in your life that has made you so bitter and angry.
"Ping! Pow!

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 02:15 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Spanky
This is just ridiculous:

I give you two little snippets of what has exchanged between me and the Serbian and you are absolutely sure you know what is going on. You never got to see mannerisms, facial expressions etc. but you know what you are talking about.

And you are doing me a favor by telling me that I should just give up and this has nothing to do with your own internal issues but is just an altruist effort to save me from further humiliation of rejection. Which is a favor that my fake friends don't be seem to willing to grant.

Please.

If you are correct what is the down side of me keeping up the chase. What is the worst that can happen to me? I get turned down again. Oh no the horror?

I was just looking for some intelligent input and I just get these bitter harangue and knee jerk conclusions. No one, on the evidence you have received, can draw a final conclusion.

Do you not think I was aware of the fact that showing up at her work could be perceived as scary? I showed up and waited until she had some free time, I apologised for showing up but I said that it seemed the best thing to do. But if I was making her feel uncormfortable or causing trouble I could leave right away. When I told her I could just walk out of her life, I made it very clear that she would never hear form me again and I totally understand. No harm done. I was really polite about it, not threatening and made it clear I did not want to cause her any consternation.

An intelligent response would be:

Here are some possibilities.

1) She is so conflict averse that she really doesn't want you around but just can't even bring herself to hint at it. And that is why the mixed signals.

2) She is not sure if she can trust. She is slightly interested but at this point isn't quite sure if going out with me would be considered a stupid risk in this day and age.

3) She does like me but wants to make sure I am really interested and not out for a good time.

4) She is interested and doesn't think she has done anything to hint otherwise. She didn't call me because she didn't want to be too forward, but that is natural.

5) She has no idea what she is thinking and just lives purely in the moment.

6) She is not balances and her moods and feelings change constantly.

I think your response for my quest for intelligent input sheds a great deal more light on your personal issues than it does on my relationship with the Serbian. Although from other peoples responses, it seems people have been trying to warn me about this.
I have a very icky feeling. I am putting down my flag and stepping off the platform.

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 02:16 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
I have a very icky feeling. I am putting down my flag and stepping off the platform.
What flag and platform? The cheering platform for Spankster? Stay on that platform, baby! He knows what he's talking about!

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 02:17 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
What flag and platform?
Waving on the trainwreck.

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 02:19 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Dude, you have NO relationship with the Serbian. I have more of a relationship with the people behind the counter at my dry cleaner. You have a better chance of fucking your plumber than you do the Serbian.

You are card carrying, 400%, off the cliff, looney tunes delusional. I love ya for it - you're the gift these boards have needed for months. But your elevator is not just missing a few floors - the car is not even in the goddamned shaft.
Tell me a bit more about this drycleaner. Does he offer you really good specials that he doesn't offer to your wife? Does it seem like sometimes he takes extra care with the creases in your pants? Has he offered to drop off the laundry at your workplace for you?

There might be some potential here if you keep an open mind.

Miss Crabtree 08-12-2005 02:22 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
I have a very icky feeling. I am putting down my flag and stepping off the platform.
Now, Now, Ms. Princess. Spanky's really a very nice little boy.

And weren't you the one who first starting bringing Spanky's little hormones to life here?

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 02:23 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Crabtree
Now, Now, Ms. Princess. Spanky's really a very nice little boy.

And weren't you the one who first starting bringing Spanky's little hormones to life here?
I can get Less to PM you the name of the strip club if you are still interested in the Serbian.

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 02:25 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Spanky
Number one assumed she doesn't like me. But she is so shy she just can't tell it. Please pay attention.
I think "Please Pay Attention" is my favcorite PB Spanky condescension.

In fact, it may be the new "Ping! Pow!

Nah.

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 02:25 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Waving on the trainwreck.
Oh. I have decided I am in favor of waving on the trains. Who knows, maybe they will slow and discover they really really like each other, and go off and make beautiful tracks together.

Miss Crabtree 08-12-2005 02:26 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I can get Less to PM you the name of the strip club if you are still interested in the Serbian.
Please. How will I know which one is the Serbian?

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 02:30 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Crabtree
Please. How will I know which one is the Serbian?
Bring a picture of Grizzly Adams and see who flinches?

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 02:33 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Tell me a bit more about this drycleaner. Does he offer you really good specials that he doesn't offer to your wife? Does it seem like sometimes he takes extra care with the creases in your pants? Has he offered to drop off the laundry at your workplace for you?

There might be some potential here if you keep an open mind.
He licks the crust off Sebby's crotch seams while SEbby is still in his pants.

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 02:37 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Crabtree
Now, Now, Ms. Princess. Spanky's really a very nice little boy.

And weren't you the one who first starting bringing Spanky's little hormones to life here?
No, but I made him a star.

Snidely Condescending 08-12-2005 02:38 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
I think "Please Pay Attention" is my favcorite PB Spanky condescension.
Hmmm. I suppose Spanky could be a relative on the distaff side.

(Father did always say that Mother's family had a few too many cousins married to cousins to be healthy.)

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 02:39 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
He licks the crust off Sebby's crotch seams while SEbby is still in his pants.
I need a dtb ruling on how this compares to the showerdrain hair vest.

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 02:41 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I need a dtb ruling on how this compares to the showerdrain hair vest.
FWIW, IMO, it's worse. Though, if the showerdrain hair vest is specified to be coated in sludge, it might win.

dtb 08-12-2005 02:42 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I need a dtb ruling on how this compares to the showerdrain hair vest.
With all due respect to fringey, even this doesn't beat the shower drainage vest. (It's close, but shower drainage wins by a hair.)

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 02:46 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by dtb
With all due respect to fringey, even this doesn't beat the shower drainage vest. (It's close, but shower drainage wins by a hair.)
My image of you is changing.

taxwonk 08-12-2005 02:59 PM
At last, the formula for success with woman!
 
Quote:
Originally posted by robustpuppy
I guess I'll have to get over my usual aversion to McDonald's.
When did you start hating me and why?

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 03:03 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
My image of you is changing.
Does the corny "by a hair" joke make her more or less of a MYLtF (oalpwhb)?

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 03:06 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Does the corny "by a hair" joke make her more or less of a MYLtF (oalpwhb)?
I don't get the initials. dtb and I are fighting it out off-board.

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 03:07 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ltl/fb
I don't get the initials. dtb and I are fighting it out off-board.
The game goes that you try to guess what the initals mean. Maybe NotBob will step up and lob in a guess on your behalf.

bold_n_brazen 08-12-2005 03:08 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
The game goes that you try to guess what the initals mean. Maybe NotBob will step up and lob in a guess on your behalf.
MYLtF (oalpwhb)

Mom you'd like to fuck or at least play with her boobs?

What do I win?

notcasesensitive 08-12-2005 03:11 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
MYLtF (oalpwhb)

Mom you'd like to fuck or at least play with her boobs?

What do I win?
Partial crush requitation. I may just jump on a plane to Florida and stop by your house.

sebastian_dangerfield 08-12-2005 04:00 PM
Don't you dare put that flag down. I want to see where this train wreck ends.
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
I have a very icky feeling. I am putting down my flag and stepping off the platform.
You're just getting an icky feeling now?

Is there any here who doubts he's taking pictures of that 9 year old?


paigowprincess 08-12-2005 04:24 PM
Don't you dare put that flag down. I want to see where this train wreck ends.
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
You're just getting an icky feeling now?

Is there any here who doubts he's taking pictures of that 9 year old?
It was the Patrick Bateman like analysis of all the reasons she isnt returning his calls.

I just had an idea. Maybe if she shows the SErbian he is childfriendly, he can bring Stacey to her workplace. But then I remembered where she works.

I assume from the lack of an update we do not have a returned phone call? Don't worry, Spanky. Six days is sex industry standard.

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 04:25 PM
This one goes out to dtb
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
The game goes that you try to guess what the initals mean. Maybe NotBob will step up and lob in a guess on your behalf.
I understand why I don't get the initials.

ETA thanks bnb.

ltl/fb 08-12-2005 04:27 PM
Don't you dare put that flag down. I want to see where this train wreck ends.
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
It was the Patrick Bateman like analysis of all the reasons she isnt returning his calls.
It was pretty chilling.

Hank Chinaski 08-12-2005 04:29 PM
Don't you dare put that flag down. I want to see where this train wreck ends.
 
Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
It was the Patrick Bateman like analysis of all the reasons she isnt returning his calls.

I just had an idea. Maybe if she shows the SErbian he is childfriendly, he can bring Stacey to her workplace. But then I remembered where she works.

I assume from the lack of an update we do not have a returned phone call? Don't worry, Spanky. Six days is sex industry standard.
the lack of updates might means he's "spliting the former Yugoslavian republic." If Spanky does get this we'll never know bacause he's too much a gentleman to talk about her, and too much a gentleman to say you women were all wrong. I'm not saying he'll get it, I'm just saying what silence would mena.

paigowprincess 08-12-2005 04:40 PM
Don't you dare put that flag down. I want to see where this train wreck ends.
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
the lack of updates might means he's "spliting the former Yugoslavian republic." If Spanky does get this we'll never know bacause he's too much a gentleman to talk about her, and too much a gentleman to say you women were all wrong. I'm not saying he'll get it, I'm just saying what silence would mena.
Please pay attention. He isn't too gentlemanly to insult ncs. Therefore, I don't think he is too gentlemanly to rub his triumph in her face.


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