The Passion of the Atticus
 

AttiKus can't seem to get us started, so we'l just name this one in his honor. At least until Slave starts meddling.

Carry on.

The Passion of the Atticus
 

Who's in charge of nailing his hands to the cross? Is Mel available?

The Passion of the Atticus
 

I'm humiliated that my 5K post was the one about lipstick application techniques and not the one about slamming Bush.

The Passion of the Atticus
 

I took care of that. He claims the board is broken. I believe the term he's looking for is "operator error." Either way, nice K.

The Passion of the Atticus
 

Burger, I just knew you were going to start the thread again.

The Passion of the Atticus
 

So your bush slamming got you "there" a little earlier then you'd hoped, huh? HArHAR har Har.

Transferring post from closed thread
 

And that's a good thing.






I'm pretty sure this lame-ass joke was not worth all the trouble I had to go through to transfer the comment from the closed thread. But since I've already done it, I expect everyone to be chuckling heartily at my not-at-all-obvious witticism.

The Passion of the Atticus
 

Thought you had me distracted long enough by that blondie?

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

There are some "long-lasting" lipsticks out there now, which you can probably find in your drug store, I think most of the mainstreet makeup makers make them now (CoverGirl, Revlon, maybeline, etc.). Usually they seem to be in two parts - part one is basically a stain, which dries onto your lips and, well, stains the skin, and the second part is basically lip balm, which goes over the top to put some moisture back into your lips and make you look like you are wearing lipstick instead of paint. It's not too horrible, but you do need to practice putting on the first coat, because if you color outside the lines and don't immediately clean it off, you will have stains outside of your lip line. The color does seem to stay all day, but once the balm stuff wears off you still look like you have dry, chapped lips, just darker.

If you are really getting back into makeup, know that foundation is back so long as it isn't matte. Even if you don't particularly like foundation, it is an easy way to remember to put on sunscreen each day, and you can get really sheer stuff that doesn't look bad at all but is SPF 15 or 20 and very subtly smooths out your complexion. I think foundation is one of those things it is worth spending some money on if you find something you like, but it is entirely possible that the stuff you like happens to be $3.50 a bottle.

But if you do foundation (unless it is really, really sheer) you probably have to go into blush. With a clean face, pinch your cheek, hard. See that color? That is what you should aim for. It is probably some sort of pink - not brown, not peach, not "bronzer", not plum, not dusty mauve, but pink. That's the color that will look least obviously made up on you. Put it wherever your face turns red when you've been outside in the cold too long (probably apples of cheeks and end of nose, maybe end of chin, but probably NOT the "all along the cheekbones, up the temples, under the jaw line, at the hairline" thing the teenybopper mags told us to do back in the '80s).

Otherwise, I think lipstick and mascara is the key combination of "no makeup" make up. You get the most bang for the least amount painting. And you don't feel like your face will crack if you smile. The key to mascara is "no clumping" (aka: no "tarantual lashes"). Put on very thin layers of mascara, and go back and put on additional coats if a thin layer isn't enough. If you are swiping at each set of eyelashes more than 3-4 times in one coat, you are putting on too much at once and going to fuck them up. Get get an eyelash comb with scary looking POINTY BRASS TEETH to comb through the clumps, and practice with it. Very little, almost undetectable, mascara can make a big difference in making your eyes visible. Stick to putting it on your top lashes only unless under the supervision of a trained professional - it's really easy to screw up putting it on lower lashes and come out looking like Liza Minelli. Some people swear by eyelash curlers, but I find those mostly useful for frightening my husband out of questioning my grooming routine.

BR(I've also found that neat eyebrows - not plucked thin, but "strays" cleaned up to give them a decent arch - greatly reduced the amount of makeup I have to wear to look like I made an effort to pull myself together)C

The Passion of the Atticus
 

I didn't think it was necessary, but I can see you're too weak to resist the urge to see your moniker on the forum page again.

Transferring post from closed thread
 

You'll also be sad (or maybe not) to hear the www.savemartha.com has been taken down.

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

Thank you so very much.

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

I am a huge fan of stila's tinted moisturizer. It's incredibly sheer, but provides just enough coverage to even out my skin tone a bit and make my skin seem young and fresh, even when I've been out dancing until dawn the night before.

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

I have not found that to be a problem with either the Cover Girl or the Revlon if you apply it sparingly. However, I do remove it after I eat a meal and reapply.

I hate the dewey foundations as they look oily to me. The problem with matte, though, is that it will accentuate any fine lines that you have.

There are some tinted moisturizers with SPF that are good for those who don't want to use foundation.

Check out the mineral make-ups if you are into natural ingredients. Jane Iredale has a nice line, but if you need more coverage, it is not the best. Mineral make-up is also good for those with rosacea.

I don't care how natural it looks to have a bit of pink color on your nose and your chin, it looks ugly. Looking natural is not always better.

Be careful, though, almost lost an eye with one of those.

Eyelash curlers are great, too.

Eyebrows are the key to looking polished. Without doing something to your eyebrows, you look unfinished.

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

So long as it has sunscreen, too. I have pretty oily skin, so there is a tight limit on how much crap I can slather on before my face slides off into my lap. Putting anything powdered on top just turns the whole mess into mud. I can sometimes get away with two layers of stuff in the winter, but never more than one in summer, meaning that if I get adventurous I need to resort to a big hat for sun protection, and sometimes big hat just isn't the look I'm going for. So I am a HUGE fan of any "all in one" stuff.

BR(though the "terribly sensitive to the sun" bit is a wonderful excuse for wearing outrageously big hats for no apparent reason)C

True that girlfriend.

I naturally have sort of brunette/auburn hair. But I have had my hair dyed just about every shade you can imagine.

I look okay in any shade of brown from the very darkest chestnut to the very lightest caramel.

I look okay in any shade of red, but man, the upkeep is a bitch.

But as a blonde, I just sort of fade. Honey doesn't work. Platinum doesn't work. And nothing works in between.

So, blondes may have more fun, but not if they're me.

hair
 

I'd consider myself a hair guy, if you will, as opposed the the more common breast and ass men.

Good hair:

Length is not really a priority, although some people like like hair exclusively. If the question is longer versus healthier, then definately healthier wins. I've definitely found very short hair attractive on some women.

Quantity is not critical so long as it meets certain minimums. Thick is good, but lots of volume isn't a positive of a negative, depending on hair type. I generally go for smooth hair, but I had a girlfriend once with huge curly hair who was very sexy.

Shiny in the sense of healthy is good. Oily not so good.

Soft is good. Very good.

Strong such that it can be held onto / clenched at appropriate times is good.

Straight vs. wavy vs. curly is a matter of personal taste. I don't really care so long as the cut and style is appropriate and the person is working with it instead of against it.

Some people are biased toward a color. I have a slight preference for redheads, but not enough to override an otherwise promising head of hair. Bad dye jobs are bad.

A good cut is critical. Split ends are bad.

Hair should also smell nice. Chemically hair is bad.

Really, it's a total package issue for me, but some people emphasize one aspect over another (primarily color and length, it would seem).

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

I am a huge fan of Origin's A Perfect World skin guardian instead of moisturizer and under foundation. It keeps a hell of a lot of crap out of my pores, and it helps keep make up where it needs to be. My skin felt and looked much, much better after a week or so of using it, and I'm now almost fanatical about making sure that it's on my face.

Continuing the makeup thread...
 

MAC makes something called Creme Matifiante which seems to matte out the face, and leave it very very smooth. I use it when I'm doing fancy make-up for a big evening.

Other than that, I like neutrogena's tinted moisturizer with SPF and something from Benefit called I am Rebel which is a tinted moisturizer with SPF.

I agree re: eyebrows. I go to a Russian woman named Galina for all of my waxing. She's a genius. The day after she does my eyebrows, I look like I've had cosmetic surgery...

hair
 

So, can I get a little support here on the trend towards bangs for women from the hair guy? I'm against it. Don't know why, but when a pretty girl gets bangs, I'm so disappointed.

hair
 

It totally depends on the hair line. A woman with a high hairline must have bangs or she will look like she has a huge forehead.

hair
 

I'm so hot for you right now!

I have always been of the mind that I should leave my hair pretty much the same color and texture I was born with so, during the big-hair years, I kept my hair straight.

For blondes, the best guy in the world is Nick Chavez in Beverly Hills. I will GET ON A PLANE and make an appointment weeks in advance to have him cut my hair, he is that good. But I must warn you, he loves blonde and might make you one even if you're not.

Make up for all of the make-up talk
 

[Lumberg Voice ] Yeahhhh we're gonna have to interrupt the make-up talk with some Brooke Burke[/Lumberg Voice ]:



http://www.solmax.com.mx/chicasdelwe...mages/b020.jpg


Edited to provide link instead of image because received complaints that this is not work appropriate. I would say it is on the line. Please error on the side of caution with nudity, since we do, after all, have a forum specifically for it. L

hair
 

*sigh* I'm vain about my hair. I think it's my best feature, and I'm in love with the way it looks exactly right now, though I probably should get it cut in the next two or three weeks. It's stacked, with some choppy layers that don't look layerd. I have very thick, wavy hair that responds well to humidity, sometimes bordering on outright curly.

With the exception of some teenage experimentation with lemon juice / sun-in, I've never colored it, though lately the grey has been showing a little more so I'm going to have to bite the bullet and talk to my stylist about how to retain the medium brown color it is and also get rid of the grey.

hair
 

Stop it. Coltrane-pleaser.

Death watch 2004
 

WASHINGTON - Attorney General John Ashcroft has been hospitalized with a severe case of gallstone pancreatitis, his chief spokesman said Friday. Pancreatitis, an inflammation of the pancreas, is usually caused when a gallstone blocks the passage leading from the pancreas to the beginning of the small intestine. It also may be caused by excessive alcohol consumption...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4456560/ While this is a mild condition, and he'll probably get over it, still - it would be interesting if he didn't.

hair
 

I'm not going to jump on the anti-bang bandwagon. It depends on the cut.

However, on many women bangs will always look bad, and on almost anyone, they're dangerous. Bangs have to be maintained carefully. When they're too long, the person looks like an idiot and/or completely unkept.

Nonetheless, it's not impossible to love a girl with bangs. See early Demi Moore. Of course, it was more the fashion then, but I remember thinking she was hot, but don't remember thinking "except for the bangs."

Death watch 2004
 

It is apparently quite painful, however. That's too bad.

hair
 

For this to come from an avatar with no hair whatsoever explains much.

Carry on.

hair
 

Stop it, stop it. I'm married. Arghhggh.

Make up for all of the make-up talk
 

Her breast implants look awful naked. You would think someone married to a plastic surgeon would have a better set of implants. The implants are not centered behind her nipples. They do that to try to create cleavage in a woman with far apart breasts pre-op. The nipple on the left points outward more. Most of her naked pics, you only see one nipple. She either covers the other with her hand or they catch her from an angle that you only see one.

She also has some rippling of the left one that you can see in certain shots.

I don't know why she doesn't get it fixed since it obviously bothers her because in most of her naked pics she tries to cover it up. If she didn't make a living off her looks, that might be different.

SPREE - naked Brooke Burke pic:

http://www.abcdiscounters.com/jr/Wal...ive-Beauty.jpg

Doesn't this just always happen?

(Drunken Polish Nun Crashes Her Tractor.)

DUDE -- get off the NyQuill
 

Atticus posted this, like, 10 minutes ago!!

(More like 3 days ago, but my brain is addled as well -- what a shocker, I know...)

DUDE -- get off the NyQuill
 

Yeah, well, . . .

I posted it better.

(Oops.)

DUDE -- get off the NyQuill
 

FWIW, I have no memory of having posted this. It was, however, prominently featured yesterday on almost all of the Weird News sites I frequent.

hair
 

My own requirement is that hair must be asymmetrical --- it can be all of one length, but it must be parted to one side, never the center, and never pulled tightly back off the forehead. Worst look ever is pulled straight back into a ponytail, with a poof or bangs up front. Ugh. Think "Tonya Harding." That's a very popular look in California's central valley (Sacramento, Modesto, Fresno, Bakersfield). I call it the femmullet. (<-- I invented that.)

Bangs are not good. Bangs make dark haired women look like Prince Valiant. See paigow's avatar.

DUDE -- get off the NyQuill
 

Lots of people think Atticus is too risque for the times. bilmore always posts clean, I can usually let my kids read his stuff. I have no problem with bilmore redoing things cleaned up that atticus had done dirty. Howard Stern does not make Jay Leno irrelevent.

hair
 

I think paigow's avatar is hot. It makes me think of riding crops.

hair
 

This is exactly what I'm talking about. See below too:

http://www.canoe.ca/Lifewise2Beauty0308/27_loreal2.jpg

or this:

http://www.charliesweb.com/tonya/box..._News_Conf.jpg

as compared to this:

http://planete.qc.ca/images/showbiz/tonyaharding.JPG

I will step back from my opinion that all bangs are bad, as you're right, some people can pull it off, but for the most part, yikes.

Flinty, arbiter of women's fashion.

Death watch 2004
 

This seems like an appropriate moment for my monthly reminder that had the Democrats not illegally and unconstitutionally allowed a rotting corpse to win a Senator seat in Missouri, Ashcroft wouldn't be AG today.