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Some of these replies focus on your relationship with your son as parent, which is perfectly appropriate for your private discussions. In determining what the appropriate discipline is, however, and in conveying it to your son and the team, you need to be a coach, not a parent. Not only would it be unfair to your son's teammates if you treated him differently than them, it would be unfair to him. It would deprive him of the opportunity to have a coach, in addition to a parent, and it would open him up to resentment from his teammates.

Based on your original post, I think you already have this pretty firmly in mind, but I wanted to reiterate it in light of the suggestions you are getting about child psychology and docking allowance and the like, which I think are inappropriate in this context.