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[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by bilmore
A start:

"Moderator: You have a new plan.

Senator Kerry: Can I just say here Chris for one moment that I have a new plan?

Moderator: Er... exactly. (he gestures but she does not say anything) What is it?

Senator Kerry: Where? (looks round)

Moderator: No, no. Your new plan.

Senator Kerry: Oh, what is my plan?

Moderator: Yes.

Senator Kerry: Oh what is my plan that it is. Well Chris you may well ask me what is my plan.

Moderator: I am asking.

Senator Kerry: Good for you. My word yes. Well Chris, what is it that it is - this plan of mine. Well, this is what it is - my plan that I have, that is to say, which is mine, is mine.

Moderator: (beginning to show signs of exasperation) Yes, I know it's yours, what is it?

Senator Kerry: Where? Oh, what is my plan? This is it. (clears throat at some length) My plan that belongs to me is as follows. (clears throat at great length) This is how it goes. The next thing I"m going to say is my plan. Ready?

Moderator: Yes!

Senator Kerry: My plan by J Kerry. Brackets Senator, brackets. This plan goes as follows and begins now. I will spend more at the beginning, still more in the middle and then more again at the end. That is my plan, it is mine, and belongs to me and I own it, and what it is too.

(apologies to Monty Python)

http://www.interocitor.com/archives/000444.html

One commentator pointed out that the debate was more fun if, every time Kerry said he had a plan, you pretended that he instead said, "I have a girlfriend in Canada."