Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
Spanky:
Don't know where to start. OK here goes
1) Porkchop is TOAST. SO are Spittles and Whiff if you allow the wildlife to roam within the screen door. The next thing you know is Wile E. COyote will pay a visit and you will have a couple of tabby tails lying around with no cat attached.
2) I am pretty solidly certain that the issue of whether the screen door waslookced or not has zilcho to do with the raccoons entrance. They don't have opposable thumbs, Focker. They can't open doors. Also, I am pretty solidly certain that Raccooons enjoy cat foot (especially moist) just as much as a skunk. The only thing we have learned here about raccoons v skunks is that raccoons are more resourceful.
3) You don't have Air Conditioning? Or are you just thrifty? This could be a problem for me. I enjoy a cool bedroom at night.
4) Why didnt you get out of bed and shoo the raccoon or skunk or whatever outside? When you puss out like that it only tells them, "Free Food, lets get the frat brothers and party". Were you scared?
5) This is not the kind of Spanky who showed up this weekend. THat once was an intrepid, resourceful man who knew what he wanted and how to get it. That Spanky would not cower under the covers while the Raccoon ate Salami's moist cat food. This post definitley is a point in the Chance column for sure.
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Oh! And I have a great Skunk story. One time I was driving to a barbecue at one of my parent's Yacht Clubs (Spanky digs this WASPy shit, so please indulge me). Anyway, I was driving along, getting ready to turn in to the club when I heard this CRUNCH. Then about one second later, POOF! Skunkstink everywhere.
As I did not have to juice in the car, I just decided to go to the BBQ. Of course, when I got there, Everyone was bitching that it stank like skunk. I am sure when they go to the parking lot and walked by my skunky car, they knew it was me. The Skunk Killer.
If I embarrassed, I would have been so embarrassed.