Quote:
Originally posted by Tyrone_Slothrop
Yeah yeah yeah, tiger attacks -- whatever. What I want to know is, how is Celine's show?
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I haven't seen it. But according to A.A. . . .
"Anyway, Celine finally comes on, and the audience drags itself away from itself and claps as best it can, with its hands full of napkins nestling pints of sticky cocktails and boxes of snacks to wardoff the 90 minutes of rumbly pangs.
"My guess is that most in this audience don't get out to live shows much. Just being here seems to be a jewel in some sort of bigger experience. Certainly Dion doesn't have to work hard to win them over. They're a sure thing. Not that it stops her - she doesn't so much project songs as implore them to leave her body. Those huge, overproduced, emotionally incontinent power ballads sound like the forced exorcism of goody-goody ghosts. You half expect - half wish - her head would swivel 360 degrees as that ungodly French-Canadian glottal accent sobs, "Could taste your sweet kisses, your arms open wide." For all her gym-tuned, dance-coached stagecraft, Dion still manages to look like the fat kid who won Weight-Watcher of the Year. Her body is corded and knotted with self-restraint. Her movements are over-rehearsed and picky-precise - more Prussian cheerleader than Martha Graham. She looks good for an age she won't actually reach for a decade and does that Vegas thing - begs. She begs the audience to love her with a naked, generalized, "I'm everybody's" sycophancy. There's more than a hint of bunny boiler, a manic desire to please and a smiley-implied nameless threat if we're not appreciative enough. In fact, her stage presence is a weird hybrid of Pinocchio and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The show finally sinks beneath the applause during an encore of Celine alone, howling on the deck of the Titanic. The audience troops out, stuffed but underwhelmed. Still grazing from tubs, hungry for the next gobbet of experience."
So, str8, was this your impression of Celine from your last Vegas trip?
P.S. Ty, meet me over on the PB and I'll quote the latest Hitchens article on Iraq.
