Greetings, tasty lawtalkers!
I've been away from Vegas for a while honing my new act in - you guessed it - the Catskills. Yeah, I know the area has a reputation for stale comedy. But trust me, nobody does the "take my wife, please" jokes when I'm around. At least not any more. The act is really coming together. It's just great for me to hear the roar of the crowd instead of vice versa for a change.
Which reminds me: Two tigers are stalking through the undergrowth in single file when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the behind of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, "Hey! Cut it out. What's up with that?"
The rear tiger replies, "Well, I just ate a lawyer and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!" [ba dump dump]
But seriously, folks, I'm not here just for laughs. I'm here to remind you that the civil rights of ALL tigers, and not just us inbred mutant ones, continue to be violated. As indicated here:
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp..._us/tiger_lady
tigers are being uprooted from their land and being sent to detention centers all the way across the country (although I hear they are anxious to sample indigenous San Antonio cuisine). Big, beautiful cats are being killed for nothing more than their curiousity. My brothers are being drugged simply for voicing their opinions. So, you see, despite all your best efforts, there is still much work to be done.
Anyway, I'd love to stay and tell jokes all afternoon. But I can't. I always adhere to the showbiz maxim, "get off quick." Just like str8 on his wedding night. [ba dump dump] You've been beautiful! Bye, folks!
