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Originally posted by robustpuppy
This talk of flat asses reminds me of a suitemate in my college dorm who was flattest person I ever met. Flat ass, flat chest, flat cheekbones, flat nose, flat lips, and flat personality. To make matters worse, she walked with her feet out, like a clown. It was like she was born for a life of standing in front of the doors on the subway.

There were only two things that were not flat about her: she had frizzy hair and a sharp whiny voice. And she tried to be a bitch in the tradition of her very pretty friend, who kept flatsy around so as not to detract any male attention from herself.

As far as I know, flatsy never had a date in college. Serves the bitch right, as far as I can tell. With her lot in life she ought to have worked harder on the charm.

I was thinking after the first paragraph it was going to continue with something like "But amazingly, these rich east-coast prep school guys were all over her!" B/c of the 10-yr-old boy thing.