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Master & Commander
I saw Master and Commander: The Far Side of Crowe's Career last night.
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Might as well call it Gladiator Goes to Galapagos. The battle scenes were admittedly cool, and there was some occasional stunning filmography, but the plot was thinner than gruel on a Pacific crossing. Not nearly enough keelhauling or scurvy dogs being tied to yardarms (bonus points for including parrots and monkeys, though). Some questions:
1. Why are critics falling over themselves praising this shit? Are they afraid of pissing off Crowe?
2. Mainstream Hollywood is gay (see 12/03 cover of VF and accompanying article). Why the need to keep making these in the closet gladiator and sailor movies?
3. Was the naturalist character real or was he just in Crowe's mind?
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"More than two decades later, it is hard to imagine the Revolutionary War coming out any other way."
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