violins, I'm sorry and hope this isn't insensitive, but thread tie----
I wrote a letter to a guy that killed himself before he got it, and which I wished I hadn't sent.
In college I'm playing chess by mail with a friend. It was a way of keeping in touch, plus that summer we'd started playing pretty regularly. It was not as nerdy as it sounds.
So about 10 moves into a game, he sents me a postcard with a move and this poetic sweet-and-lite thing like
"As spring moves towards summer, and shoots spring up, so to does our game mature and possibilites of moves and gambits arise. We must live through the rain so the good to come can grow, blah blah,etc."
It was all BS, we just would write crap.
So tobe anti-poetic I sent a postcard back with my move- which was a senseless sacrifice move:
Screw your poetry, and its "slow growth" sentiment. I'm killing stuff- this game is going to get bloody- very bloody indeed."
I mailed the card, then got a phone call the next morning he had killed himself. His parents got my card a few days later and thought that I must have been insulting him alot and part of why he was depressed. It was fucked up.
The thing you realize when you know someone who kills themselves, is the harm a suicidee does to all the people around him, far outweights the "comfort" he gets from it.
