GO ABBA GO!!!

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
How long do you think it will be until ppnyc points out that I made a boring food post?

Depends on what you mean by "eat".

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
On doing it, or on abstaining from and from fantasizing about it? I mean, saying "today I prayed for 8 extra hours and then wore a hair shirt and ate saltpeter to keep from thinking about or engaging in blasphemous acts" is boring. Saying "today as I listened to the bishop lead us in prayer, I thought about coating his mitre with butter and honey and then sliding it in and out of my mouth, simulating fellatio, whilst squeezing lemons from Portugal with my well-exercised Kegel muscles. After returning to my cell, I flogged myself with a crop in repentance, but Satan intervened and turned what should have been the pain that would lead to forgiveness into a perverse pleasure that I am sure will damn me to the deepest pits of hell, and I was unable to keep my hand from sliding into that warm, throbbing place that should be for my lord Jesus only" is somewhat less boring.

Translation: Hank! PLEASE MAKE A MONK OR A PRIEST AVATAR!

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
Holy shit. Wanna have coffee?

I only have one tattoo, silly.

In any event, Theresa the nun or whatever is posting about having happy orgasms, not about abstaining from sexual behavior. So her writings aren't even a counterpoint to my point. ppnyc is posting about abstaining, and how she is largely unhappy about it, except from the belief that it is somehow morally superior. But even people who think that being somewhat overweight is a moral failing (you KNOW who you are) don't want to hear at length about deprivation. Just like people who believe abstaining from sex, or deriving pleasure from sex, don't really want to hear about not having sex or having non-fun sex. They either guiltily engage in second-hand sex, or they make talking/reading/watching/hearing about sex as much of a moral failing as engaging in it.

So I think ppnyc needs to take the plunge and regard all food, even low-calorie healthy food, as a verboten, sinful subject that must be avoided.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
This place? http://www.originalpancakehouse.com/

I took dtb to breakfast there once. She had pancakes. And an omlettte.

That girl can eat.

A link to a site with the OPH menu (which includes dutch babies and their fabulous bacon and the forty-niner pancakes) is not a boring food post.

I used to get the dutch baby and bacon and then sometimes an english muffin with jam to fill in the cracks. And I weighed 105. And I didn't throw it up or anything. People hated me. I wish my body still worked like that.

[SlaveNoMore]

ABBAKiss
I learned recently that if you take a shit and then shave your pubic hair onto it it is called a "stuffed animal."

I thought you waxed?

[dtb]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
This place? http://www.originalpancakehouse.com/

I took dtb to breakfast there once. She had pancakes. And an omlettte.

That girl can eat.

That place was AWESOME. There's a place near me that has the most delicious, fluffiest, butteriest pancakes. They don't have waffles, though (and I love waffles), but they have these biscuits that are to die for.

They use so much butter, they can't go wrong.

[LessinSF]

Just received (but in really BIG RED font):

"MAKE DONATION TODAY! Donate for website which fights with money laundry and child porno please!!"

Now, I'm down with laundry (pillow) fights, and even down with money fights (since that's what I do for a living), but fighting with child porno is just wrong - the pages get all messed up.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by dtb
That place was AWESOME. There's a place near me that has the most delicious, fluffiest, butteriest pancakes. They don't have waffles, though (and I love waffles), but they have these biscuits that are to die for.

They use so much butter, they can't go wrong.

The best donuts in Benson, Arizona don't suck either.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by dtb
That place was AWESOME. There's a place near me that has the most delicious, fluffiest, butteriest pancakes. They don't have waffles, though (and I love waffles), but they have these biscuits that are to die for.

They use so much butter, they can't go wrong.

In Charlotte, North Carolina, there is (or at least was) an OPH that stayed open until like 9 pm, so you could have a dutch baby FOR DINNER.

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
In Charlotte, North Carolina, there is (or at least was) an OPH that stayed open until like 9 pm, so you could have a dutch baby FOR DINNER.

I thought cannibalism was Wonk's schtick.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

• AFRICAN FAMILY ADOPTS BRITNEY'S KIDS.
  
  LOS ANGELES—A Malawi couple has completed adoption paperwork for Sean Preston Federline, 2, and Jayden James Federline, 1, after their mother, Britney Spears, lost custody of the children Monday.
  
  It was Ms. Spears' inability to provide car seats that initially brought the plight of her children to the attention of the Malawi couple, who wish to remain anonymous, and who will be referred to here as Mr. and Mrs. M. But it was the widely circulated photograph of Ms. Spears' vagina that really drew their concern. "In our country, a good mother does not show her business to the press," Mrs. M said. "It is very bad luck." After Spears' "performance" at MTV's Video Music Awards, the adoptive couple knew they had to do something. "We could not allow innocent children to live under such horrific conditions anymore," they explained. "The Third World can no longer turn a blind eye to the tragedy affecting so many U.S. celebrity children."

more

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Gattigap
I thought cannibalism was Wonk's schtick.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

6 more weeks of TITS!

[Sparklehorse]

Originally posted by ltl/fb

I make that at home all the time -- had it for breakfast on Saturday, even! It's really easy to make.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
How long do you think it will be until ppnyc points out that I made a boring food post?

(Does anyone else read the subject line and hum "Hey Jealousy" by the Gin Blossoms?)

I was recently rushed to the emergency room with a heart "event"; they said I needed to take it easy in the office and avoid the cholesterol. Do you know what it means to avoid cholesterol?

Doughnuts and cupcakes are not so bad; it's animal fats that suck wind. Things like CHEESE. I could kill for some CHEESE. It's been two weeks without even a little cream cheese on my bagel. And so someone goes around on these boards talking about how all they are eating is nice, full of animal fats CHEESE, and they're complaining about it.

Here's my advice to Ms. CHEESE. Screw the goddamn diet* - get a little exercise - maybe pretend you're actually alive in bed for 10 minutes. Enjoy that cheese while you can. Not all of us are so lucky.

Sheesh.

* And what kind of diet is it where you're eating CHEESE, anyway? Do you know how many calories are in that? Step back from the trough, piggy, and try a few carrots.