Fringey's taut-abbed painter

[SlaveNoMore]

Atticus Grinch
Indeed. They say Sebby and Slave were the most seamless give-and-go duo in Cornell history. A well-oiled machine, they said. Sadly, the people who said this didn't realize Slave had never attained the concept of metaphor.

Atticus' posts are like the pervasive, noxious smell that blows into your car whilst driving down the NJ Turnpike.

At least I've learned the art of simile.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Oh how I long for the days when people avoided pointless posts, for fear of hittting post counts that where indefensibly high. Do you remember when Fringe first crossed 1000? she fretted for a month. Anything she posted then had merit, real merit. Kids today, they just dream up a few scattered words to post on the net, then hit post.

Sequels rarely improve upon the original. It's not like your original post left any unaswered question. This effort is no Godfather 2 or Superman fucking 3. How will you post next if Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise are unavailable?

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Atticus' posts are like the pervasive, noxious smell that blows into your car whilst driving down the NJ Turnpike.

At least I've learned the art of simile.

You should show more teeth. Feigned sincerity helps.

[bilmore]

Originally posted by casserole
Well put Hank. I’m not going to chime in with all sorts of crap like this is my first post or whatever, I just want to say I read most of your original Blue Triangle shit on Infirmation and you can write. Of course for most kids these days vacuity is the new profundity. I am reminded of a month of so ago when I was on the Hill meeting an intern, whom I had picked up the night before at the Hawk and Dove, for lunch, when I happened upon a press conference that Texas Representative Sam Johnson was giving. Granted the guy is both a Republican and well known blow hard but we both hale from Plano, Texas, so I felt obliged to listen in. Old Sam was jawing about how both W and House leader Tom Delay were stalwarts in the battle to preserve "traditional family and moral values" and how the Democrats disdain for values was responsible for a variety of social ills in our nation. Thankfully I hadn’t eaten because I am sure I would barfed all over my Brioni suit. Finally, after about 5 minutes I could no longer take it and felt sick to my stomach and like my head was going to implode (or explode or both simultaneously, if that is possible) and I shouted aloud, “FAMILY VALUES IS CODE FOR RACIST SEXIST OPPRESSION”. While I stand by the message in my thought, it was probably better thought and unsaid then shouted out indiscriminately, or at least that is the what the 5 Capital Hill police who escorted me out of the building implied.

Following a stern warning that the next time they saw me that day would be 3 seconds before they slapped the cuffs on me, the burliest said to me "you must be a democrat?" Before I could respond, he followed up with, “are you an American?". Again I felt a wave of nausea crest my innards and all I could muster was a faint, ‘uhhuh’, as tears started to well in my eyes.

A look of disgust crossed his face and his already squinting eyes narrowed further as his brow furrowed and he jabbed his index finger into my chest as he quietly but firmly said "damn straight better be son."

I immediately turned tail, my eyes fixed on the sidewalk and scurried off. In hindsight, I only wish it had been just me and him and he had been unarmed. I would have smashed him in the fucking mouth. Knuckle sandwich with extra mustard.

Hail.

You're usually more careful.

[SlaveNoMore]

Shape Shifter
You should show more teeth. Feigned sincerity helps.

'Tis the Holiday Season.

[SlaveNoMore]

bilmore
Hail.

You're usually more careful.

Puh-lease. Em's worse than the sap who blinks furiously every time he gets a pocket pair.

[casserole]

Originally posted by bilmore
Hail.

You're usually more careful.

Don't play the fool with me bilbore, it's the british variant.

More importantly, I have a question for the booze hounds here. I came back to the office from an Xmas holiday week in Turks and Caicos and found that one of the acquistion guys at a client had sent me a bottle of Johnny Walker Green Label. Apparently you can't get this here in the States (this guy had been traveling in France). As for me, even in my travels I have never seen this stuff in the US or elsewhere.

Anyone knows how it stacks up to the Blue Label? I'm figuring if its crap I can send it to my brother who I still have not got a Chistmas present for, although if its good, I'm keeping it for late nights in the office.


So?

[casserole]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Puh-lease. Em's worse than the sap who blinks furiously every time he gets a pocket pair.

I remember reading that Ronald Reagan was famous for telling a story about a boy who yelps with delight at a pile of dung, digging into it eagerly with both hands and when asked "why??", said "with all this manure, there must be a pony in here somewhere".

You remind me of the type of kid who would jones a pony like that.

[bilmore]

Originally posted by casserole
Don't play the fool with me bilbore, it's the british variant.

Ah, yes. Compound your definitional gaffe with a homophobic quip. Always an impressive save.

[bilmore]

Originally posted by casserole
Anyone knows how it stacks up to the Blue Label? I'm figuring if its crap I can send it to my brother who I still have not got a Chistmas present for, although if its good, I'm keeping it for late nights in the office.

Do you like your brother? No? Then send it to him.

[SlaveNoMore]

casserole
... one of the acquistion guys at a client had sent me a bottle of Johnny Walker Green Label.

Give it to the fat assistant down the hall. I'm guessing she needs some love.

True boozers drink Johnnie Walker.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
Late breaking news {Spree: Celebrity Nude Database; same site as LFM's link}:

• We have been able to confirm through various sources that the woman in the sex tape we have is NOT, repeat NOT Paige Davis of TLC's Trading Spaces. She looks and sounds almost exactly like Ms. Davis, but is certainly not her. I want to apologize for any misleading information that came out of this. We were trying our best to keep this quiet, but some within the company just had to get this info on the internet. Again, sorry.

Update: all references to Paige Davis have been removed from CNDB. Somebody got lawyered up. Too bad Lloyd Grove didn't get the same memo. You'd think he'd do better research with all that free time he now has fulfilling his promise never to write another word about a certain glorified innkeeper's daughter.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by pussycat
Maybe I am not cut out to be a lesbian. ABBA, what’s your secret for walking on both sides of the fence?

Suavey hair and great TITS.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Wouldn't an original fan have known most of this without having to read the review? This is really the type of tripe I meant. People feel like insiders beause they read something in the paper, or on an internet 'zine. Guess what? If you read it in a review to the masses, you're just a trendoid trying to keep up.

This is one of the dumbest things you have ever written, here or anywhere. It is so dumb that the fact that it was intentionally dumb is scarcely a mitigating factor, much less a justification.

Hank, a new year is approaching. Will you join me in my quest to elevate the level of discourse on this board? I think that we can really make a difference here, and I think it is worthwhile to do so. But it will mean that you will have to stop posting stupid things, even on purpose. No more Gilligan posts, the presumed dadaist value of which was always suspect. The Guernica posts will have to become far more occasional, and even then somewhat better thought out. And just drop the whole "feud with TM" thing.

I know this will require some sacrifices on your part, and on mine as well. But let us lead by example. The up and coming newbers, like casserole, will be sure to follow. And, in early January, our fellow contributors to this forum will shake off their hangovers and log in to a better board.

Thank you for your anticipated cooperation in this regard.

I am the Flower.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I am the Flower.

No, *I* am the Flower.