Merry Generic Winter Day-Off With No Religious Content

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
But your ex's insistence that the bf not sleep over is ridiculous. What is he thinking? That you'll never have sex with the Brazenette in the house? That she'll never know that you are involved with someone else?

I would set a pretty strict expiration date for that policy. (I'm assuming that you also aren't allowed to fuck other people in the house while the little one is home. If not, that could affect things.)

I don't think that's so ridiculous. If the goal is to ensure that his child isn't exposed to a parade of paramours prancing in and out of bnb's and therefore his daughter's life, it makes sense to have some sort of gauge on how serious a relationship is before sleepovers are allowed. I'm sure bnb wouldn't want him to introduce their daughter to the next and better blonde bimbo he's boning every time he has her.

TM

[Secret_Agent_Man]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Get a life? You sound like ppnyc to TM. You requested input. After a while, I had to do something to relieve the huge amount of cognitive dissonance.

"Wise men speak because they have something to say. Fools speak because they have to say something."

-- Plato

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
You suck, Sidd. That was confidential. To Hank.

Aw, c'mon. I've always considered you an offer too good to pass up. I'm pleased to hear that someone else agrees.

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I don't think that's so ridiculous. If the goal is to ensure that his child isn't exposed to a parade of paramours prancing in and out of bnb's and therefore his daughter's life, it makes sense to have some sort of gauge on how serious a relationship is before sleepovers are allowed. I'm sure bnb wouldn't want him to introduce their daughter to the next and better blonde bimbo he's boning every time he has her.

TM

I agree with you, but I didn't realize she was dating a whole parade.

I thought the bf had been around for longer. Hell, she's talking about marrying him -- and if she says that on the FB, it must be true.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I don't think that's so ridiculous. If the goal is to ensure that his child isn't exposed to a parade of paramours prancing in and out of bnb's and therefore his daughter's life, it makes sense to have some sort of gauge on how serious a relationship is before sleepovers are allowed. I'm sure bnb wouldn't want him to introduce their daughter to the next and better blonde bimbo he's boning every time he has her.

TM

Had you just finished reading the NY Post before you wrote this?`

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Had you just finished reading the NY Post before you wrote this?`

Personally, I was awed by his alliterative acumen.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Had you just finished reading the NY Post before you wrote this?`

I think a "parade of paramours prancing" is from the 12 Days of Christmas.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
It's my name. I get to decide.

Did I suggest otherwise?

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
I agree with you, but I didn't realize she was dating a whole parade.

I thought the bf had been around for longer. Hell, she's talking about marrying him -- and if she says that on the FB, it must be true.

There is no parade. Current bf is the only man I'm dating, the only man I've dated for about 7 or 8 months, the only man I intend to date and the only man I want to date. He is also the only man I've introduced to the Brazenette.

Add to that the fact that I've known him since I was 13, and yes, that I expect he'll be part of the Brazenette's life for the rest of his.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Did I suggest otherwise?

Just remember that the next time I tell you to say my name, I want you to get it right, bitch.

[nononono]

Originally posted by Not Bob
It's really not that simple. And it may be Not Rational, but I can see why bn'b sharing the bedroom in the (former) family manse with The New Guy while the kid is around may be troubling to the ex in a way that bn'b sharing the bedroom someplace else might not be.

And I can see why bn'b would want to give her ex a bit of time to get used to the idea that his kid is going to meet one of bn'b's friends. The bottom line is that she is wrestling with the difficult balance between what is optimal for her and what is optimal for her kid. Giving the ex a bit of leeway for a bit of time on the issue of sleeping arrangements when his daughter is around makes sense to me in this context.

Of course, this assumes that the ex is not a complete dick -- I am pretty sure that bn'b has indicated that this is the case.

Having had this exact same situation, my personalized view is that I can understand there being some "say" before the divorce is final (I know; arbitrary line), but afterward, you are separate people in every sense. He may want to exercise some control (and whether or not it's put forth as some moral thing, it's about control), but divorced is divorced.

That said, it's easy to say "fuck the ex" in the abstract. When it's a relationship you have a very strong interest in preserving, for the good of the child/ren, it's a different matter. Bnb, given the time passed and your overall relationship, though, I'd think it's going to be fine, ultimately, to have booked the vacation.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
Just remember that the next time I tell you to say my name, I want you to get it right, bitch.

Way to keep the paramour prancing.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
OK, so you will honor (and told your ex you would honor) your ex's wish that you not have your bf sleep over at your own home when your daughter is there, but you don't want to give him any say in whether you take a vacation with the daughter and the bf, during which vacation you and the bf share a bedroom at night?

Pick. A. Lane.

I actually don't see anyone at fault here.

If she has respected her ex's wishes to keep guys from sleeping over until (i) the relationship is one that she is sure is long-term and (ii) she has determined the guy is going to be nice to their daughter, then no big deal.

If she has determined that now is the time to expose the new boyfriend to the daughter because it's been long enough already and she loves this guy and their relationship is important, a trip with the family is a good choice for the introduction to the family because it says to the daughter, "This guy is important to me and will be part of our family."

I think I disagree with asking the ex whether he is okay with it as opposed to telling him that she is now in a meaningful relationship because that should assuage any concerns he has that his daughter would be exposed to some loser who means nothing to bnb.

It's difficult for bnb, but it is also difficult for the ex because the ex can easily keep his life with the daughter separated from his dating life since she lives with bnb. But once bnb makes a decision to bring someone else into her life, the daughter will be exposed to him much more than with anyone the ex decides to be with.

TM

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Belgian beers should always be poured into a glass. Although the Belgians have special glasses for each beer, I just use a wine glass, which is a little prissy but whatever. I'm not sure why you need an open-mouthed glass, but I bet the internet will tell me. Because the internet knows everything.

Is it OK to drink DT out of a Chimay glass (I think it is a Chimay White glass)? Because that is how it is served to me. They are both tripple/triples. Horny Devil is served in the same glass. And, of course, Chimay is served in that glass.

I am new-ish to the beer.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
Much as the Maryland flag is a symbol of reconciliation between the pro- and anti-slavery sides in the Civil War, the open-mouthed Chimay glass is a symbol of reconciliation between the Flemish and Walloons in Belgium. The Flemish traditionally drank their beer from open-mouthed tankards; of course, the Walloons used narrow glasses.

I have a friend who once asked me, after I told him I was dating a woman who lived a good part of her life in Belgium, whether or not she spoke "Belche."

TM