Fringey's taut-abbed painter

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I like when women (and it's always women, for some reason -- and they're much more bold with my ex) stop my daughter on the street when it's like 70 degrees and say, "Hi, cutie, where is your hat and coat? You're going to catch the flu if you don't bundle up." They never have the balls to say it directly to me. I would like to pull their heart though their rib cage, and put it on their head to wear as a hat.

Not only do they not understand that kids don't need to be completely bundled up just because they're kids, but they don't understand that if a two year old won't wear a hat, you might as well leave it at home, because it ain't gettin' worn.

I was out with my son last weekend in a fairly crowded place, and he was playing in a place- and age-appropriate way while I was doing something else and watching him from about 30 feet away.

This older woman in a couple walks over and starts talking to him, and he talks back, but I can't hear what they're saying. After a while he points in my direction, and she turns and looks very confused. So then I have to go over and find out what her problem is.

She was worried that he was there alone, so she asked where is mother was. He said, I didn't bring my mother. So she asked where his father was, and he said, I didn't bring my father. So she asked who he was there with, and he said, my aunt, and points to me.

I wish I could take credit for teaching him to fuck with strangers in this way, but he came up with it all by himself.

[Buddha]

Originally posted by John the Baptist
The one who is more powerful than I is coming after me; I am not worthy to stoop down and untie Her thong or Her sandals.

This chasing is quite disturbing. Clearly, you need to find a more tolerant and forgiving God.

Remember, holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
That just goes without saying.

Then why did you say it?

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by pony_trekker
I think that there is an inverse relationship between bundling up and getting sick.* The ones that wear t-shirts w/o jackets in any weather over freezing are the ones that never get sick.


*Unless the weather is severe enough to cause frostbite.

We had a Norweigan au pair who used to go outside in a t-shirt in the snow in the middle of winter. She never got sick, and couldn't understand why we were all bundled up.

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
In case y'all are missing the reference, this is from the new album, A Very Cali Handel's Messiah.

The refrain is catchy as well.

NOOOOOOO McDonalds!
Or Old Fatties!
Or Umbrellas!
On the Sidewalks!
Near the Metro!
Get Out of Myyyyy Wayyyyyy!

[John the Baptist]

Originally posted by Buddha
This chasing is quite disturbing. Clearly, you need to find a more tolerant and forgiving God.

Remember, holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.

Alas for you, liar and Pharisee! What secretary's cross stitch did you steal this drivel from?

I have some grievances to air. Time for the Feats of Strength. Some of you are about to get pinned. But first I must find my aluminum prole.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
We had a Norweigan au pair who used to go outside in a t-shirt in the snow in the middle of winter. She never got sick, and couldn't understand why we were all bundled up.

Recent exchange with my sister as I picked her up a few nights ago:

She's standing on the curb in front of her building wrapping her arms around her jean jacket and hopping.

She quickly opens the car door, hops in and says, "Wow! It's almost wintery!" She finally gets around to looking at me and laughs.

I'm in a fuzzy hat, a fuzzy scarf, a sweater and my leather jacket.

"It's supposed to get in the 30s tonight!"

"I see that."

She never gets sick.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I have some grievances to air. Time for the Feats of Strength. Some of you are about to get pinned. But first I must find my aluminum prole.

A FESTIVUS MIRACLE!!!

[baltassoc]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall

1. Post any good stories you have of someone minding your business, when they should have kept their noses out of it.

2. What is it about people that makes them so fucking nosy and meddlesome?

I think I posted this before, but WTF.

I was in an airport with the baltspawn back when they were too young to talk, travelling to visit the grandparents and leaving behind the baltspouse for a well deserved break. I'm waiting in line at the Starbucks when the lady behind me starts talking to the kids in that really-talking-to-the-parent way. "Where's your mommy?" she says, "You two shouldn't be travelling all alone without your mommy."

So I told her their mother had passed away.

End of conversation.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
TM telling NFH that she is ignorant for not knowing their music or not knowing that it has received all sorts of world acclaim over the top to me. I mean, do we all have to know everything about genres of music that we don't appreciate? Can I take a Celine Dion fan to task for not being able to tell the difference between Coldplay and Radiohead?

Actually, I was taking her to task for implying that because she hadn't heard of them, it meant they only had one hit and were overhyped. It seems to me that if you're admitting to not knowing anything about an artist, saying they are unsuccessful when they are wildly successful is just stupid. It was more like, "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about, do you?" I'm sure you can understand that criticism.

TM

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by dtb
To wit: At my bus stop in the morning, it is the custom of the civilized to wait in a line along the curb. The other day, this punk-ass bitch decided she was special and didn't have to wait in the line (which was about 30 people long, at least), and she would just go straight to the front. I politely told her that there was a line, indicating to the 30 people standing patiently along the curb. She didn't move, but asked me who elected me mayor of the street. My immediate response was, of course, that as the first person in line, I was the de facto (I think that might have thrown her) representative of those standing in the line. I then said, "See, that's how we do it here in civilization." She still didn't move, but when the bus came, I blocked her from getting on, and told everyone waiting to go on ahead of me, as I was preventing the line-cutter from getting on before the people who had waited.

Someone on the bus saved me a seat -- and the punk-ass bitch was none too pleased with me, let me tell you.

You have got to be kidding! That's crazy! The bus??? What happened to the car service? Can't you have your stable manager drive you?

[dtb]

Originally posted by mmm3587
You have got to be kidding! That's crazy! The bus??? What happened to the car service? Can't you have your stable manager drive you?

First of all -- how do you think I pay for my horses' upkeep? All the money I save by taking the bus, of course!

Furthermore, it's not my stable manager -- it's the manager of the stable where I keep my horsey. Alas, I don't yet have my own stable -- but just a few more years of riding the bus, and I should be ready to take that plunge.

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by baltassoc
I think I posted this before, but WTF.

I was in an airport with the baltspawn back when they were too young to talk, travelling to visit the grandparents and leaving behind the baltspouse for a well deserved break. I'm waiting in line at the Starbucks when the lady behind me starts talking to the kids in that really-talking-to-the-parent way. "Where's your mommy?" she says, "You two shouldn't be travelling all alone without your mommy."

So I told her their mother had passed away.

End of conversation.

I love fucking with strangers like this.

I agree with dtb and others that it's a location-based thing; you have to do something pretty egregious in NY of Chicago to have someone come up to you or your kid and have them criticize you. It's also generational; I can't imagine someone younger than 40 or so doing this, and I think that Generation Xers (ugh, I hate that term, but it is good shorthand) and below will probably never try to pull shit like that.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by dtb
...my horses' ...

...my horsey ...

One or many?