Happy Birthday, Preston Michael Spears Federline and other Certain Special Someones! - Page 221

10-10-2005, 05:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sparklehorse
This is a great idea in revenge-fantasy land, but in the real revenge consulting business, you need to be able to get this kind of psychological result without leaving such a clear evidence trail for the divorce and custody proceedings.

Translation:

Dear Mr. Marshall,

We regret to inform you that, after carefully considering our revenge-consulting needs and the quality of your proposal, your firm has not been selected for retention at this time. Please accept our best wishes for success in the future.

Yours, etc.

Sparklehorse Partners LLP

Not Bob · 10-10-2005, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sparklehorse
This is a great idea in revenge-fantasy land, but in the real revenge consulting business, you need to be able to get this kind of psychological result without leaving such a clear evidence trail for the divorce and custody proceedings.

"I said *what*? Oh, absolutely not -- why would I ever call Bill? Yeah, I was tempted to hit him a couple of times, but I realized that was stupid. But . . . calling him to discuss my sex life with my wife -- with *him* of all people? That's just . . . weird. Wow. He's really got issues."

Hank Chinaski · 10-10-2005, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Penske_Account
What if Bill is already cream pie'ing her backside on a daily basis, lubefree, and responds along the lines of "Word. She can't enough of it back there. For variety's sake I am glad she suggested we bring in the 2nd chick to share".

I would imagine if that was the result, your little strategy would be backfired. With a capital "B".

Maybe give him advice for what to look for to predict an oncoming herpes flareup from the missus so he can avoid the infectious periods. Make it subtle things so he's always on edge.

Gattigap · 10-10-2005, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Not Bob
"I said *what*? Oh, absolutely not -- why would I ever call Bill? Yeah, I was tempted to hit him a couple of times, but I realized that was stupid. But . . . calling him to discuss my sex life with my wife -- with *him* of all people? That's just . . . weird. Wow. He's really got issues."

"Your honor, I'd like to enter into evidence the outbound telephone logs from Defendant's office on October 10, 2005, as Exhibit N."

bilmore · 10-10-2005, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Not Bob
"I said *what*? Oh, absolutely not -- why would I ever call Bill? Yeah, I was tempted to hit him a couple of times, but I realized that was stupid. But . . . calling him to discuss my sex life with my wife -- with *him* of all people? That's just . . . weird. Wow. He's really got issues."

And then he plays the tape . . .

Naw, I still think you're better off fucking with her sexual confidence. A few comments like "Has Bill mentioned that weird grunting noise you make when you come?", and orgasms'll be just a fond memory for her.

cuckold · 10-10-2005, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Gattigap
"Your honor, I'd like to enter into evidence the outbound telephone logs from Defendant's office on October 10, 2005, as Exhibit N."

That's why I'm making the call from Thurgreed's cell phone.

Did you just call me Coltrane? · 10-10-2005, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Not Bob
"I said *what*? Oh, absolutely not -- why would I ever call Bill? Yeah, I was tempted to hit him a couple of times, but I realized that was stupid. But . . . calling him to discuss my sex life with my wife -- with *him* of all people? That's just . . . weird. Wow. He's really got issues."

Are you Bob Loblaw?

Replaced_Texan · 10-10-2005, 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Maybe give him advice for what to look for to predict an oncoming herpes flareup from the missus so he can avoid the infectious periods. Make it subtle things so he's always on edge.

Doesn't defamation specificially identify references to "noxious diseases"?

Did you just call me Coltrane? · 10-10-2005, 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Or he could go to the source.

Call Bill, tell him your wife told you about how he likes to [whatever was in the birthday card], and then tell him that while she likes that, he can tell if she really likes him by how often she lets him take her up the ass.* When you were with her and times were better, she couldn't get enough of your dick in her ass. How she wanted it without lube as it got loosened up from all the action. Etc. You know.

That will surely spend a lot of time floating in his mind.

TM

*I believe we explored why something like this tends to bother guys already on this board.

Cuckhold needs to fuck Bill's mother. In the ass. And then conference call Bill and ex-wife and tell them how much she loved it.

ThurgreedMarshall · 10-10-2005, 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sparklehorse
This is a great idea in revenge-fantasy land, but in the real revenge consulting business, you need to be able to get this kind of psychological result without leaving such a clear evidence trail for the divorce and custody proceedings.

"Your honor, I was just trying to be helpful. She really does like it up the ass. Go ahead. Ask her. (Between you and me, maybe you should ask her in camera, knowhutimean?)

TM

ThurgreedMarshall · 10-10-2005, 05:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Penske_Account
What if Bill is already cream pie'ing her backside on a daily basis, lubefree, and responds along the lines of "Word. She can't enough of it back there. For variety's sake I am glad she suggested we bring in the 2nd chick to share".

I would imagine if that was the result, your little strategy would be backfired. With a capital "B".

Not really. His wife is already a huge bitch he has no interest in getting back together with. How does this make anything worse?

TM

ThurgreedMarshall · 10-10-2005, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Gattigap
"Your honor, I'd like to enter into evidence the outbound telephone logs from Defendant's office on October 10, 2005, as Exhibit N."

Because calling from a pay phone takes such a criminal mastermind that almost no one could think of it.

TM

ThurgreedMarshall · 10-10-2005, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cuckold
That's why I'm making the call from Thurgreed's cell phone.

And just like that, I'm back in the revenge business, baby!

(You can suck it Ironweed.)

TM

Gattigap · 10-10-2005, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
And just like that, I'm back in the revenge business, baby!

(You can suck it Ironweed.)

TM

Shipping your cellphone together with your response to the RFP was a nice touch, but FWIW it doesn't increase your odds of getting paid.

Not Bob · 10-10-2005, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Gattigap
"Your honor, I'd like to enter into evidence the outbound telephone logs from Defendant's office on October 10, 2005, as Exhibit N."

Please, Gatti. Clearly you have never represented scumbags.*

I, uh, hear that they have disposable cell phones these days that you can buy for cash at The Stop N Shop (and other fine convenience stores), and activate with any name at all, like, say, Thurgreed Marshall, with no verification.

And who records all of their incoming calls? Other than Linda Tripp. Bill may even live in a two-party consent state.

*I mean this, of course, in the kindest of ways. I have an individual client who runs several businesses (all of the ones I am aware of are legal, technically), and he only uses the pay as you go type cell phones. And gmail, accessed from the public library. The dude is paranoid.