Missing the Paigow (et al.) [sniff]

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Unfortunately, we live in separate cities, so he gave me a little
something for when he's not around.

That's weird- me? When he's not around, I'm happy just because he's not around. I don't need any toys.

edit: ying-yang?

[J. Fred Muggs]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
You have yet to explain why. She can't close her lips. She's hung like a horse. She has never said anything funny, yet continually tries. And she's responsible for the following bullshit lines: "he's no beany baby," "he must be lifting" and a host of others that make me want to puke. So, why exactly do you like her?*

TM

*Other than her ability to trigger my gag reflex.

Hung like a horse and triggers your gag reflex. What's not to like?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Oliver_Wendell_Ramone
Are you having FMFs with ncs and Mr. Man? I didn't think that was your thing.

No. I just wanted to mooch off their Tivo. No sex involved.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Unfortunately, we live in separate cities, so he gave me a little
something for when he's not around.

You advised him, of course, that that gift makes him an accessory to your ongoing crime of distributing lewd devices?

[ltl/fb]

Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen Divorcing

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen Divorcing

Clinking on this link led me to the discovery that Eminem is reconciling with his wife Kim and that Christina Applegate and her husband (Jonathan Scaetch, or something like that) are getting divorced.

Who needs NFH?

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
You advised him, of course, that that gift makes him an accessory to your ongoing crime of distributing lewd devices?

I seem to recall the crime in question is actually possession with intent to sell/distribute. Even if she was charged, I think we probably know enough people at the DA's office that she'd get off fairly quickly.

[Oliver_Wendell_Ramone]

Originally posted by TexLex
I think we probably know enough people at the DA's office that she'd get off fairly quickly.

And that, after all, was the whole point in the first place.

[Fugee]

Originally posted by ABBAKiss
Seeing as how it is FUCKING FREEZING where I live, my car wouldn't start this morning.

Don't buy a new car. Take cabs to the gym for a couple days until the deep freeze ends then have the car shop check your battery.

If you really have to get a new car, just make sure it isn't diesel -- those are really a pain in cold weather.

[Fugee]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Unfortunately, we live in separate cities, so he gave me a little
something for when he's not around.

Yikes that is one expensive vibrator -- more so in the platinum version.

Unlike their plastic brethren, Jimmyjane's platinum, gold and satin steel vibrators hold a temperature, making for exciting variety. So use your imagination – warm it (some like it hot!) or chill it (ice cubes are so last year).

Perhaps it is just the subzero weather here, but I don't see the appeal of a cold vibrator. Brrrrrr.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Gattigap
I vaguely recall some loser predicting this show's imminent demise, who must now be crying small, girlish sobs in the pillow each night now that Colbert's hit his stride. Atticus? Uh huh. That's you I'm callin' out, son.

I don't eat crow until the fat lady has sung. However, I watch the show occasionally and admit it has been getting funnier. I reiterate he should not be allowed to interview studio guests.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by Fugee
Don't buy a new car. Take cabs to the gym for a couple days until the deep freeze ends then have the car shop check your battery.

If you really have to get a new car, just make sure it isn't diesel -- those are really a pain in cold weather.

The car wouldn't start again today. I am thinking perhaps I should just buy a new one? The one I have is a 1999 Neon that has been, um, in a few skirmishes. It looks sort of like modern art due to multiple accidents, side swiping of various posts and poles (no Swedes), and the fact that I back into the building behind my off-street parking everytime I get in the car. The bumper has a "textured" appearance because that building is stucco, and it is hanging diagonally off the car. The sunroof no longer closes (thanks Mr. Kiss!) and the windshield wipers don't work. Also, the right turn signal has not worked since 2002-2003. The tires, which are new as of a year ago, are probably worth more than the car. Hell, the residual pot left over from Mr. Kiss is probably worth more than the car.

Gratutious edit: However, until recently the car was "free" and it costs about 12 cents per year to insure it. Because I am a "good driver" according to my insurance company. I also don't smoke. So basically this is a story about how dumb my insurance company is.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ABBAKiss
The car wouldn't start again today. I am thinking perhaps I should just buy a new one? The one I have is a 1999 Neon that has been, um, in a few skirmishes. It looks sort of like modern art due to multiple accidents, side swiping of various posts and poles (no Swedes), and the fact that I back into the building behind my off-street parking everytime I get in the car. The bumper has a "textured" appearance because that building is stucco, and it is hanging diagonally off the car. The sunroof no longer closes (thanks Mr. Kiss!) and the windshield wipers don't work. Also, the right turn signal has not worked since 2002-2003. The tires, which are new as of a year ago, are probably worth more than the car. Hell, the residual pot left over from Mr. Kiss is probably worth more than the car.

Gratutious edit: However, until recently the car was "free" and it costs about 12 cents per year to insure it. Because I am a "good driver" according to my insurance company. I also don't smoke. So basically this is a story about how dumb my insurance company is.

If the problem is just starting in the morning, and you don't mind smashing into stuff, maybe you can find a health club downhill from where you live.

[ABBAKiss]

I like the gecko green with black leather interior VW bugs. Discuss?

[bilmore]

Originally posted by ABBAKiss
The car wouldn't start again today. I am thinking perhaps I should just buy a new one? The one I have is a 1999 Neon that has been, um, in a few skirmishes. It looks sort of like modern art due to multiple accidents, side swiping of various posts and poles (no Swedes), and the fact that I back into the building behind my off-street parking everytime I get in the car. The bumper has a "textured" appearance because that building is stucco, and it is hanging diagonally off the car. The sunroof no longer closes (thanks Mr. Kiss!) and the windshield wipers don't work. Also, the right turn signal has not worked since 2002-2003. The tires, which are new as of a year ago, are probably worth more than the car. Hell, the residual pot left over from Mr. Kiss is probably worth more than the car.

Gratutious edit: However, until recently the car was "free" and it costs about 12 cents per year to insure it. Because I am a "good driver" according to my insurance company. I also don't smoke. So basically this is a story about how dumb my insurance company is.

Geeze. You're a highly paid professional. You can afford a car. Go buy a Mini Cooper - it sounds like it would fit your requirements exactly.