Fashion Board 5-7-04 to 6-9-04 - Page 16

ltl/fb · 05-10-2004, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Keller'd is good, but its really even meaner than "whiff". for those who would like something less confrontational, perhaps this passage can help:

Anne had Helen hold one hand under the water. Then she spelled "W-A-T-E-R" into Helen's other hand. It was electric! The feeling turned into a word. Immediately, Helen bent down and tapped the ground; Anne spelled "earth." Helen's brain flew; that day, she learned 30 words.

I would suggest that spelling W-A-T-E-R, makes the point, but carries a certain constructive criticism tone that might make some feel better.

You are good with this avatar. Though I can see Bobby's point about confusing.

Replaced_Texan · 05-10-2004, 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
You are good with this avatar. Though I can see Bobby's point about confusing.

Me too. Though I do think it's hysterical.

barely_legal · 05-10-2004, 02:50 PM

1) My mother is multi-orgasmic. She has 2-3 orgasms every time she and my father have sex

2) My mother won't give my father blow jobs b/c she thinks they are "gross"

3) My sister is a spitter. After blowing her husband, she runs to the bathroom and spits out his manjuice in the sink.

I didn't need to know any of this. I'm so traumatized that I'm sharing it with all of you and I hope this post makes each one of you accidentally picture your parents having sex and then not be able to get that picture out of your head.

Did you just call me Coltrane? · 05-10-2004, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
You are good with this avatar. Though I can see Bobby's point about confusing.

Until you just pointed it out, I thought it was Paigow...

Very nice Hank. You have some cropping skills, unlike Atticus, who has crapping skills.

ltl/fb · 05-10-2004, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by barely_legal
1) My mother is multi-orgasmic. She has 2-3 orgasms every time she and my father have sex

2) My mother won't give my father blow jobs b/c she thinks they are "gross"

3) My sister is a spitter. After blowing her husband, she runs to the bathroom and spits out his manjuice in the sink.

I didn't need to know any of this. I'm so traumatized that I'm sharing it with all of you and I hope this post makes each one of you accidentally picture your parents having sex and then not be able to get that picture out of your head.

How frequently do your parents have sex? How frequently does your sister blow her husband?

pony_trekker · 05-10-2004, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Jenna deserved to lose after she stabbed poor Rupert in the back. And Shii Ann gets the car? Hm. Swing vote schming vote, Amber owes her nothing. Rob screwed himself for playing dirty the last few weeks. But you can vote for the 2nd million dollar winner on CBS.com. I predict Rupert wins the second mill.

Now this show is for the truly retarded. I realize people want to see pretty people doing stupid things but let me know when there is a "Survivor Suck and Fuck" marathon on.

pony_trekker · 05-10-2004, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by barely_legal
1) My mother is multi-orgasmic. She has 2-3 orgasms every time she and my father have sex

2) My mother won't give my father blow jobs b/c she thinks they are "gross"

3) My sister is a spitter. After blowing her husband, she runs to the bathroom and spits out his manjuice in the sink.

I didn't need to know any of this. I'm so traumatized that I'm sharing it with all of you and I hope this post makes each one of you accidentally picture your parents having sex and then not be able to get that picture out of your head.

Please share with us how the conversation got around to sucking, fuckingand spitting manjuice. I have a dinner party tonight and would love some pointers on how to steer the conversation in that direction.

ThurgreedMarshall · 05-10-2004, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by barely_legal
I didn't need to know any of this. I'm so traumatized that I'm sharing it with all of you and I hope this post makes each one of you accidentally picture your parents having sex and then not be able to get that picture out of your head.

Sorry. I can't get the picture of your mom and sister out of my head right now.

TM

ThurgreedMarshall · 05-10-2004, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by pony_trekker
Please share with us how the conversation got around to sucking, fuckingand spitting manjuice. I have a dinner party tonight and would love some pointers on how to steer the conversation in that direction.

Did you invite barely's family?

TM

str8outavannuys · 05-10-2004, 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Jenna deserved to lose after she stabbed poor Rupert in the back. And Shii Ann gets the car? Hm. Swing vote schming vote, Amber owes her nothing. Rob screwed himself for playing dirty the last few weeks. But you can vote for the 2nd million dollar winner on CBS.com. I predict Rupert wins the second mill.

It's got to be Rupert or Rob, there's no other logical choice (maybe Lex will get a few votes, the two Jennas might as well, but I bet Rupert and Rob combine to get over 80%, with Rupert winning). That said, I'm voting for Jerri.

barely_legal · 05-10-2004, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Sorry. I can't get the picture of your mom and sister out of my head right now.

TM

I sincerely hope that if you ever have a daughter, you walk in on her having sex one day.

If that thought just gave you a woody, I give up.

sunnybunny · 05-10-2004, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by barely_legal
I sincerely hope that if you ever have a daughter, you walk in on her having sex one day.

If that thought just gave you a woody, I give up.

Barely, i no longer want to meet your parents. I take back whatever I said. I won't be able to look them (or your sister) in the eye anymore.

Did you just call me Coltrane? · 05-10-2004, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by barely_legal
I sincerely hope that if you ever have a daughter, you walk in on her having sex one day.

If that thought just gave you a woody, I give up.

In our minds, your mom is Diane Lane and your sister is Tiger Wood's fiance's twin sister. The only person it doesn't work for is you and whoever else knows your family.

Replaced_Texan · 05-10-2004, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by barely_legal
I didn't need to know any of this. I'm so traumatized that I'm sharing it with all of you and I hope this post makes each one of you accidentally picture your parents having sex and then not be able to get that picture out of your head.

If it helps any, my sister and I got kicked out of the house fairly early last night because my parents were "tired" and wanted to go to bed. We're pretty sure that the discussion of the tantric workshop my sister had been to the night before led to my parents' being "tired."

str8outavannuys · 05-10-2004, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
Cease and desist str8. I've got litigators (hi Sidd!) and I'm not afraid to use them.

Sometimes those throw-away lines really are the best. That said, Wonk has now told me to go to hell through 3 different electronic media. I'm waiting for the text message to appear on the whiff-phone.

That said, not only do I have litigators the type of which this board has never seen, I have the resources of one of the world's foremost media conglomerates at my disposal and will unleash all of its power like the fury of 1,000 suns.

And in an ironic twist, after my riffing on Tom Cruise's lawyers, I'm about to fire off a C&D letter telling a small Florida christian company to stop sending Tom Cruise (or anyone else) offers to star in a sequel to a movie for which they don't own any sequel rights. Good times.