Quote:
Originally posted by purse junkie
Can't you people just buy and enjoy a damned drink without worrying if it's cool enough or passe?
Fuck. This is why closet cosmo addicts end up hurling up good bourbon.
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The cosmo? Who the fuck would be seen drinking that shit? If you're a guy, its unacceptable. If you're a chick, you're too green to deal with a martini, which advertises that you probably suck in the sack. Worse, you might think SATC is cool and secretly wish sarah Jessica Daltrey's character and her friends could actually be emulated realistically in real life. Either way, you ain't worth the breath most guys would have to waste...
Bourbon, on the other hand, advertises that you like to have a good time. You probably like fucking, and if you're a chick, you probably have non preblem telling the guy exactly how you like it. Bourbon is the cocaine of alcohol - it clarifies, amplifies and brings to the surface in glowing technicolor the elements of your personality you keep hidden. You are more the person you are in the midst of a bourbon binge than you are the sober button downed person at work. Liars don't drink bourbon.
Bourbon lets you be the screaming baboon you are. It takes you back three or four rungs on the evolotionary chain and strips the detritus of modern mannered social behavior aside like varnish remover. You never really know a person until you've had four or five manhattans with him.