A frolic in Cambodia

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
The discussion of marriage and whether it is relevant any longer if kids aren't involved on the PB has reminded me of something that I find irksome. I'm in a pretty serious relationship with my boyfriend (yes, I'm tired of this term, but have not found a suitable replacement) and we live together (but this came up even when we didn't live together, I guess becuase of our age, career level, etc.), but quite frequently people refer to him as my husband. These are obviously not people I know particularly well or they would know we aren't married. I don't tend to correct them when they call him my husband in passing (I also typically don't correct mispronounciations of my name or other things of this nature in casual conversation unless it seems like I'm going to have a past-the-end-of-this-cocktail-party relationship with someone). So one night recently we were out and someone referred to him as my husband, and I didn't bother to correct them, and the conversation went on ... and at some point it came up that we are not married. So the person I was talking to got all offended like I had held us out as married because I hadn't bothered to correct the earlier misinterpretation.

What am I supposed to do in these situations? Isn't my method ok, I mean is it my responsibility to correct people when they ask about my husband and they clearly mean my boyfriend? It seems to me that is stopping otherwise pleasant conversation to point out a technicality. I mean who really cares if they went through an evening thinking people they met were married, only to learn that (gasp!) they're only co-habitating?


Ps. What is a better term for boyfriend? I know this has been discussed before, but I don't recall any good alternative. I feel like I'm still in high school when I call him that. Fuck Partner doesn't seem to go over well on the cocktail party circuit.

As long as you feel comfortable correcting their grammer and punctuation, you should feel comfortable correcting their substantive errors.

Possible names for the beau include mate, hyphen, plaything, main squeeze, love slave, life partner, mid-life partner, temporary partner, poosslq (pronounced Poss-L-Q), better half, lesser half, other half, significant other, insignificant other, co-habitant, roommate, and, of course, your "Daddy".

Or you could call him your beau.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
I could just eat you up.

I love you so.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Has there ever been a thread about dumb firm policies?

I worked at two firms where the unofficial (as in: written nowhere, but you got gently counselled for breaking it) policy was that associates could not close their office doors unless they were on a call and using a speakerphone. The partners assumed (correctly) that when our doors were closed we were either (a.) discussing compensation; (b.) complaining about staff fuckups we didn't want the partners to learn about; or (c.) doing unkind impressions of the partners or their spouses and children.

There seemed to be no recognition that partners got to discuss us behind closed doors, and that whether or not you are using a speaker phone the caller can hear them FUCKING TALKING LOUDLY IN THE HALLWAY OUTSIDE MY OFFICE.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Does anyone know the proper ettiquite for naked conversations in the gym locker room?

The rule of thumb in a men's locker room is don't look down, and if you do, accidentally or on purpose, snap a towl against their ass while you do it.

[dtb]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
I worked at two firms where the unofficial (as in: written nowhere, but you got gently counselled for breaking it) policy was that associates could not close their office doors unless they were on a call and using a speakerphone. The partners assumed (correctly) that when our doors were closed we were either (a.) discussing compensation; (b.) complaining about staff fuckups we didn't want the partners to learn about; or (c.) doing unkind impressions of the partners or their spouses and children.

There seemed to be no recognition that partners got to discuss us behind closed doors, and that whether or not you are using a speaker phone the caller can hear them FUCKING TALKING LOUDLY IN THE HALLWAY OUTSIDE MY OFFICE.

cf. White & Case (I think, don't know from personal experience), where it was REQUIRED that your door be closed.

No, wait. I think they used to (or maybe still do -- who knows?) require men to wear their suit jackets if they were to wander outside their offices.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
I worked at two firms where the unofficial (as in: written nowhere, but you got gently counselled for breaking it) policy was that associates could not close their office doors unless they were on a call and using a speakerphone. The partners assumed (correctly) that when our doors were closed we were either (a.) discussing compensation; (b.) complaining about staff fuckups we didn't want the partners to learn about; or (c.) doing unkind impressions of the partners or their spouses and children.

There seemed to be no recognition that partners got to discuss us behind closed doors, and that whether or not you are using a speaker phone the caller can hear them FUCKING TALKING LOUDLY IN THE HALLWAY OUTSIDE MY OFFICE.

My office door is always closed because EVERYBODY DIALS AND TALKS AND CHECKS THEIR VM ON SPEAKERPHONE WITHOUT HAVING THE COURTESY TO SHUT THEIR DOORS, EVER. So I hope that's not my firm's policy. I make it a point to remain ignorant about firm policy, just as I make it a point to ignore firm gossip. This latter point is primarily because I think I may be a subject of gossip, and my feelings are easily hurt.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
she's young now, she's wild now, she longs to be free.
she's got the magic power of the music in [I forget the correct pronoun - she? me?] fuck

Close
Somethin's at the edge of your mind, you don't know what it is
Somethin' you were hopin' to find but your not sure what it is
Then you hear the music and it all comes crystal clear
The music does the talkin' says the things you want to hear

CHORUS:
I'm young, I'm wild and I'm free
I got the magic power of the music in me

She climbs into bed, pull the covers overhead and turns her
little radio on
She's has a rotten day so she hopes the DJ's gonna play her
favorite song
It makes her feel much better, brings her closer to her dreams
A little magic power makes it better that it seems

She's young now, she's wild now, she wants to be free
She gets the magic power of the music in me

If you're thinkin' it over but you just can't sort it out
Do you want someone to tell you what they think it's all about
Are you the one and only who's sad and lonely, reachin' for the
top
Well the music keeps you goin' and it's never gonna stop

The world is full of compromise, the infinite red tape
But the music's got the magic, it's your one chance for escape
So turn me on - turn me up - it's your turn to dream
A little magic power makes it better than it seems

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by dtb
cf. White & Case (I think, don't know from personal experience), where it was REQUIRED that your door be closed.

No, wait. I think they used to (or maybe still do -- who knows?) require men to wear their suit jackets if they were to wander outside their offices.

good god. That's as bad as Safeco's (former) white-shirts-only-with-dark-tie policy.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by dtb
cf. White & Case (I think, don't know from personal experience), where it was REQUIRED that your door be closed.

No, wait. I think they used to (or maybe still do -- who knows?) require men to wear their suit jackets if they were to wander outside their offices.

It was only very recently that the Harvard Club eliminated their rule that women in the club needed to be escorted.

This kind of stuffiness is why I never stay at the Ritz (always the Four Seasons).

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Fugee
Your relationships are only doomed if you have the poor judgment to get serious with someone who wants and needs to get more compliments than you are comfortable giving. Ditto for me if I had the poor judgment to get serious with someone who waits until they "mean something" and gets annoyed by too frequent compliments.

Ridiculous. Again, I don't wait until they "mean something." Saying that I don't do it all the time because I don't think they mean anything if you do is completely different than what you just said.

Either way, you're right. We're clearly not meant for each other.

TM

PS - People who want or need compliments are annoying too.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
good god. That's as bad as Safeco's (former) white-shirts-only-with-dark-tie policy.

I had a boss a few years back suggest that I wear white shirts with suits. I didn't do it, but he seemed to want me to.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
The rule of thumb in a men's locker room is don't look down, and if you do, accidentally or on purpose, snap a towl against their ass while you do it.

I think this explains a lot.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I had a cat a few years back suggest that I wear white shirts with suits. I didn't do it, but he seemed to want me to.

Was the cat grey? If so, he probably just wanted to ensure that hairs would be visible on both the suit AND the shirt.

[SlaveNoMore]

sebastian_dangerfield
You're more of a Triumph guy, eh?*

* That, PLF, is a pretty nice reference - and no googling.

He's young now, He's wild now, He wants to be free
He gets the magic power of the music in me

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I had a boss a few years back suggest that I wear white shirts with suits. I didn't do it, but he seemed to want me to.

good god man, did your jaw drop and say - what? Are we selling insurance now?