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Old 02-12-2004, 03:16 PM   #1561
Did you just call me Coltrane?
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
There was a point at which Hillary was passably attractive.

This wasn't that point.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:16 PM   #1562
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Now, now, Flinty. I'm sure it is not because you are ugly. Ugly people get hit on all the time, and not just on anonymous laywer internet chat boards. The majority of the country is ugly and they are all out there hitting on each other left and right. If you are not getting hit on, I'm sure it has more to do with a personality defect.
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Accord. If you're ugly probably your mom and dad are also ugly and they both found someone.
Quote:
Originally posted by Spookyfish
Naw, flinty. It's probably just that you need some help with your sex-rap. I'd ask Hank for pernters.
Gentlemen:

Thanks for your wise and sage advice. I salute you. However, after thoughtful deliberation and self-exploration (hi Hand!), I have decided to go another route: plastic surgery. Please let me know your thoughts on cup size, I'm leaning towards a nice c-cup.

Best,

Flinty
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:17 PM   #1563
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
There was a point at which Hillary was passably attractive.

I'm saving this shit. This is akin to a Dean concession speech. Can you say "credibility all go bye bye." don't even bother to come to Politics anymore; you will not be taken seriously.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:18 PM   #1564
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Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Accord. If you're ugly probably your mom and dad are also ugly and they both found someone.
BTW, Hank. Today is Lincoln's Birthday... Got a beard and stovepipe hat for us?

Of course, all of the state and local government offices and courts are closed here today, as usual. And I'm here. What a crock...
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:19 PM   #1565
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Quote:
Originally posted by ThrashersFan
I haven't even opened the article yet but I know it will be good.
It is good. It treats pond hockey with the type of reverence that I think you will appreciate. I cannot wait for them to do a piece on broomball.

Quote:
I knew in my heart that you are not really the way that the others here portray you.
This is true. But there will always be haters out there. I know who you are. And you hurt me.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:19 PM   #1566
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Quote:
Originally posted by ThrashersFan
All that matters is that I know that you like me..you really do. And you didn't even try to hide it by sending me this article in private. I feel so much better now..."oooh, child, things are gonna get easier. ohhh, child, things will get brighter."
I heard a rumor that your box was full. I assume that the gossipy one who told me this was referring to your PM box, but I can't be sure. Might want to check it just in case. Or any other box you might have (nudge, nudge, wink, wink)

Rest assured that I care enough to tell you this despite the fact that I don't love you.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:21 PM   #1567
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What does this mean?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It means one happy gasket.


You are much more pithy than Martin Luther, who tended to go on and on when asked this question.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:22 PM   #1568
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Conan the Canadian

Watching Conan the last two nights has led me to conclude that Canadians must not spend a lot of time in large groups outside of hockey games. WTF is up with all of the hooting and spontaneous yelling? It's distracting and (I think) uncharacteristic of the Canadians I've met (most from Winnipeg; YMMV). When they cut to the audience, it's clear there's no one over 25 in the entire place and fully ⅓ of them are wearing hockey jerseys. Can the CC (thanks, str8) confirm they all think it's appropriate to give private shout-outs in the middle of a live-to-tape show, beyond the 30-second grace period after the host enters for the monologue? People who go to a taping in NYC are by definition tourists, so it can't be that the home audience is more blasé than tourists generally are. I would have assumed Americans would be bigger asses.

While we're at it, has someone explained why it's the "Maple Leafs"? This is grating. Some thought went into this, presumably, and they chose a word that is a third person present conjugation, not a plural noun.

BTW, there is a special place reserved in hell for people who drop lit cigarettes out of moving cars. I'm just sayin'.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:23 PM   #1569
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
There was a point at which Hillary was passably attractive.

Yeah, I would pass.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:23 PM   #1570
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Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
This wasn't that point.
Does she have to keep her Chicago roots to please you?

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Old 02-12-2004, 03:24 PM   #1571
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Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Are you serious? Hillary has legs that belong on a piano, an ass wider than two strike zones and a face that could scare a dog off a meat wagon.
Perhaps all true, but we will see what Chelsea's ass and legs look like when she is Hillary's age. As for their faces:



In that picture, Hillary is pushing 50 or maybe in her 50's even. Chelsea is like 17. Should the 50 year old mother look better than the 17 year old daughter? I am not saying that Hillary is a looker. I am just saying that compared to Chelsea, Bill and Hill aren't that bad looking.

Don't even get me started on her hair. Does her hair mean that Bill would have a 'fro if he grew his out 'cuz Hillary's is straight.

Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Bill may have a WC Fields cauliflower nose, but otherwise, he's a normal looking cat. Compared to his wife, he's Pierce Brosnan.

How could poor Chelsea avoid being ugly?
Agreed that Bill is Pierce compared to Hill, but that only helps my argument. Chelsea is not a clone of Hillary and her dad is better looking than Hillary but she is worse looking than either Bill or Hillary. You would expect her to be somewhere inbetween the two when it comes to level of attractiveness.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:25 PM   #1572
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Does she have to keep her Chicago roots to please you?

Actually we're pleased she didn't come back, and can't figure out how we got so lucky that she didn't...
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:27 PM   #1573
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Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
This wasn't that point.
I have been to Chicago, and I'm really curious as to where it is that you spend all your time that you are surrounded by really hot people such that normally not-unattractive/well-groomed people are deemed hideous. Because I certainly didn't get that impression of the place.

This would go for whereever Hankie is and Pittsburg or Harrisburg or whatever for SD and various other places.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:29 PM   #1574
Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
This wasn't that point.
Allow me to rephrase, also, to answer the question:

There was a point when she was not ugly. If you think at this point she does not meet that standard, then I expect you to be doing a lot of talking to Ms. Hand.
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Old 02-12-2004, 03:30 PM   #1575
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Quote:
Originally posted by Not Me
[Chelsea]
You're phoning this one in, bro. It's like you don't even care anymore.
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