Removing the feeding tube from our aging hipster plaid pants

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by ABBAKiss
No. She is what I usually refer to as a "non-entity" (yes, I know this is unforgiveably rude. Sue me.) There is nothing interesting about her at all and you don't even know she is there until she complains or until her glass eye rolls across the floor. She is not ugly, just very not hot. I would imagine sex disgusts her.

The real question is: how did she get your e-mail address?

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by Gattigap
Please post the promissory note. I wanna read the part about how John Snow will drive up in a Ferrari and pay the debt with grocery bags of cash.

You people were on a roll with the latest threads.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Do you suppose this is the Rude Fat who would not get off of MR's couch when he came home from a busy day at the office?

I'm not entirely certain the rude fats we know are capable of reading and writing, no less opening the yellow pages and finding a lawyer to write up something for them.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
She's plus-sized?!?

Dude, she's using a box cover to obscure her FUPA.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Law firm website

Is your MSN start page set to 1999?

Shit. STP.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
She's plus-sized?!?

Do you not SEE the enormous roll of FLESH on her TUMMY?

Seriously, I'm pretty sure that you all (not you, Alex, but numerous people on the board) have slammed women with that amount of abdominal fat for wearing low-cut jeans. Because it was possible to see that it maybe was sticking out slightly over the waistband -- not spilling over like a beergut, but extending beyond.

But perhaps she's just "a fat" and not "plus-sized" which may be much, much bigger than a fat (perhaps "plus-sized" means obese?) and I'm not understanding the terminology.

[spookyfish]

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
I was young and needed.....ah forget it. I'm in danger of becoming Hank.

Worse yet, you're in danger of becoming Hank's mom.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by spookyfish
Worse yet, you're in danger of becoming Hank's mom.

He'd need a penis enlargement for that- and a breast reduction.

[robustpuppy]

Here's a familiar topic. I would like to be an advice columnist so that I could be entertained by the ridiculous letters people write. "Real high-class weddings." Classic.

Dear Amy:

Last night I opened my cousin's wedding invitation only to find the invitation -- no response card. When I called my mom to tell her this, she told me that for real high-class weddings you are required to hand-write your response. In my opinion it is not high class but cheap, because they did not have to pay for the response card nor the 37-cent stamp!

Please tell me what you think about this and what I'm supposed to do. I'm not going to the wedding because it is out of town, but how do I let them know?

No RSVP

It's called a pen; you place it on the paper and move it around, making letters and then sentences.

You should thank the couple for inviting you, then tell them you're so sorry but you won't be able to celebrate with them, thank them again and sign off affectionately.

You spring for the paper, ink, envelope, stamp and the five minutes out of your day it took to be gracious.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
The real question is: how did she get your e-mail address?

I think I gave her a card when I moved in and joined the association. I think I have to buy out everyone else in the building. Because I am not NOT bringing back random hotties from college parties for my friends.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
You people were on a roll with the latest threads.

"You people"?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
"You people"?

I'll show you "those people." You know how you hear Sally Struthers saying you can feed a kid for a month for $10? We'll check out what it costs to feed an Israeli a Seder-

How much does it cost to feed a child on Pesach?




http://lechem.org/

$54 for 1 meal? I mean, I for one know taking a Jewess to dinner is costly and all, but this is supposed to be home cooking.....

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski

Is this the Waldbaum's version of the Price is Right?

And $11 for Matzoh? Jesus Christ almighty, that's pricey.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by spookyfish
I'm guessing her lawyer wrote this letter for her.

ETA: Uh, Board of Integrity?

No way. This has the mark of a Posse Comitatus whackadoo all over it. I bet the Mom of a Fat has suits against evey federal judge in her district, all of them pro se, and hasn't paid her taxes, because she is not paid in silver coins, the Only Lawful Currency of the Realm on which taxes may be levied.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
He'd need a penis enlargement for that- and a breast reduction.

Ha ha. It is funny how you pre-emptively made fun of your own mom. Now, if anyone else tries to make a "Hank's momma" joke, it will just seem dumb. Ha ha. Nice one!