imaginary friends to fill the void that is your gaping gash. - Page 178

Flinty_McFlint · 02-01-2005, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Really, it's best to do an SSRI and wellbutrin. But zoloft is not my current ssri.

Flinty, I don't have any, and alas I no longer live near the friend who trafficked in samples so I can't steal it from his home office. Sorry.

That's okay. How about a blow job then? I need a bigger survey for my ratings post.

ltl/fb · 02-01-2005, 08:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
That's okay. How about a blow job then? I need a bigger survey for my ratings post.

Are you questioning that I give better head than Sidd or PLF?

I can't blow someone with so little faith.

Dave · 02-01-2005, 08:50 PM

If you need a little practice before blowing the FB, might I suggest a little ...?

Dave · 02-01-2005, 08:59 PM

I've never been so tempted to take up internet gambling...

Odds on Michael Jackson trial results:

Wacko Jacko Mis-trial (odds 2/1)
Michael Jackson Guilty On One To Three Counts (0dds 5/2)
Michael Jackson Guilty On Seven To Nine Counts (odds 5/2)
Michael Jackson Guilty On Four To Six Counts (odds 3/1)
Michael Jackson Not Guilty On All Counts (odds 7/2)
Any Other Outcome (odds 12/1)

Lines courtesy of My-Bookie.com.

Flinty_McFlint · 02-01-2005, 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Are you questioning that I give better head than Sidd or PLF?

I can't blow someone with so little faith.

The proof is in the, er, pudding?

NotFromHere · 02-01-2005, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dave
If you need a little practice before blowing the FB, might I suggest a little ...?

No. See, that procedure there encourages the biting and the chewing. I don't think that's what Flinty is into. Tho, I could be wrong.

ltl/fb · 02-01-2005, 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
No. See, that procedure there encourages the biting and the chewing. I don't think that's what Flinty is into. Tho, I could be wrong.

To be fair, she hasn't bitten or chewed yet. She may just really, really like that banana.

02-01-2005, 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
I'd love to see a plan whereby the US adopts a foster country every year and helps try to make that country a kick-ass place -- ......... literacy improvement programs .... Wouldn't this be right up Bush's alley?

Good idea! Feed them, civilize them, build functional roads, teach them how to read and write, etc. Can we start with Texas?

Hank Chinaski · 02-01-2005, 10:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
My penis is the approved format.

Short and pointed?

Hank Chinaski · 02-01-2005, 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Gattigap
This hardly resembles the plaid-panted, ruffled-gayness, narcissistic Flower that we've all come to know and grudgingly tolerate. Either that bitch stole your log-in again, or despite your vehement protestations, you've returned to mainlining.

you see two nasty posters going in different directions. I have become sweetness and lite, while PLF has become progessively more nasty. With every extra step between us, I am nmore sure my way was the correct way.

02-01-2005, 10:16 PM

The newest member! Just please don't say "what happened in me stays in me". Its way past its sellby date. Consider the memo delivered.

Hank Chinaski · 02-01-2005, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by paigowprincess
The newest member! Just please don't say "what happened in me stays in me". Its way past its sellby date. Consider the memo delivered.

Better listen to her man. Last night she got the only vote for best newber 2005.

ltl/fb · 02-02-2005, 12:02 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Better listen to her man. Last night she got the only vote for best newber 2005.

Who is her man, and why do you refer to him as "her"?

Atticus Grinch · 02-02-2005, 12:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
My brother is looking for an Admissions Coordinator for his theraputic boarding school for obese kids. If anybody has a younger sibling or cousin or otherwise knows somebody who's young, a good writer and good on the phone, and would be willing to work for $35,000/year and move to central California (20 mins. south of Fresno), let me know.

I commend your brother on his ingenious business model. If I were dropped off 20 min. south of Fresno, I'd go on a hunger strike too. But I wouldn't send my wife or daughters there, no matter how fat. What profiteth it a man to lose the weight, but gain Central Valley hair?

Atticus Grinch · 02-02-2005, 01:39 AM

Wondering how "Romeo & Juliet" would play out in 2005, assuming diCaprio really brought out the latent sociopathic aspects of the Romeo character? Wonder no longer. {PDF.}

I post this so everyone other than Bilmore and Wonk can get warm fuzzies about the state of modern childrearing and/or their decision not to have kids. If my kid did any of this shit, best believe I wouldn't be getting him an appellate lawyer. If anything, I'd be getting him Neuticles (tm).