Fringey's taut-abbed painter

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Not Bob
Varies by state. Here in Podunk, employees will get it unless they quit voluntarily or are terminated for "misconduct" (which is a term of art for things like "caught in the act of killing the first-born child of a co-worker," and doesn't cover things like repeatedly refusing to proofread documents, resulting in letters being sent to "Dick Licker" instead of former clients named Dick Looper).

When firing someone, do you recommend an ice-breaker, like complimenting their hair-do?

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
Amber Frey's book to hit stores tomorrow.

http://www.sanluisobispo.com/mld/san...o/10550633.htm

"I sometimes wonder if he thinks about me," Amber Frey writes in the 214-page book with chapter titles such as "Oh My God! Laci's baby is due on my birthday!" and "Isn't that a little twisted, Scott?"


I'm not a fan of "celebrity trials" -- I even tried to avoid the OJ trial -- or even law shows, because if I'm going to think about law I want to bill the time. But the public interest in the Scott Peterson trial seemed particularly morbid and bizarre to me.

Who reads this kind of shit? I suppose the people who gathered outside the courtroom every day, apparently with nothing better to do.

I didn't watch that car wreck, but from the little I did, my sole conclusion was that it was a pity Gloria Allred and Frey could not also be executed.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Well I'm a modern kind of guy
Of course I've had it in the ear before

Seb- is this obscure enough?

Fuck no. Its a goddamned Carnival Cruise ad.

BTW, gimme a definition for "shcut". I can't get it from google.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I didn't watch that car wreck, but from the little I did, my sole conclusion was that it was a pity Gloria Allred and Frey could not also be executed.

It wasn't her choice to be dragged into the public eye in the way that she was, so if she can make a little money now on her own terms, good for her.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
BTW, gimme a definition for "shcut". I can't get it from google.

Foreskin.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
It wasn't her choice to be dragged into the public eye in the way that she was, so if she can make a little money now on her own terms, good for her.

Allright, just put Allred in the gas chamber with Scott. They deserve each other. I can't even stand listening to Allred speak. I keep thinking "Those lips would clean a urinal in Penn Station if the money was right and someone from a network would film it."

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

First - I concur with Slave that Chronicles of Riddick was rather better than I expected. And it had the electric chick from Angel in it, and I like her. Then again, I will watch anything with Vin Diesel in it just so I can drool, so YMMV. Incidentally - what a weird cast.

Second - Cleopatra Jones. This is an excellent movie, which I recommend highly if you haven't seen it before. The plot of the thing (super-hot spy-chick must defeat evil local crime-boss who is messing with her boyfriend's halfway house) and sophistication of dialogue is roughly like a cross between an episode of Starsky and Hutch and a porn movie, but it is all good silliness. Just when you are wondering what the fuck is going on with her wardrobe, she takes one piece of it off and suddenly is wearing something pretty cool. (Except for the red turban with the silver lame cone on top - I still can't figure that one out.) Also, it has one of my new favorite lines in all of moviedom: "Outa sight, sistah!" Said with such a refreshing total lack of irony, you forget people actually used such simple yet colorful phrases once upon a time, and they conveyed meaning.

Third - European Vacation. This is a totally stupid movie. And the world really does not need yet another totally stupid teen sex road movie. Nevertheless, the robot-mime fight scene would have been worth the price of admission. Everyone wants to see a French robot-mime get kicked in the balls, whether they admit it or not.

Fourth - Stepford Wives. Pretty amusing. They went for more broad comedy than the original, and in general it works, but the new ending is stupid. Nicole Kidman looks luscious with dark hair and dark, urban nut-crusher clothes in the first 1/3.

Fifth - Smallpox (FX made for TV thing). Faux-documentary about a smallpox outbreak in 2002. Really not badly done at all. Any tension lost by knowing who lives (based on their giving interviews in the documentary) is more than made up for by the realism of the form and mock-footage.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Allright, just put Allred in the gas chamber with Scott. They deserve each other. I can't even stand listening to Allred speak. I keep thinking "Those lips would clean a urinal in Penn Station if the money was right and someone from a network would film it."

What have you done with your life that you listen to Gloria Allred speak so much? She might bother me, too, but I wouldn't know, because she doesn't appear in my life enough for me to recognize her.

No, if you'll excuse me, Virgin is selling Y Tu Mama Tambien for $10, and it is calling to me, "buy me, buy me," which is strange, because you would think it would be speaking Spanish.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
What have you done with your life that you listen to Gloria Allred speak so much? She might bother me, too, but I wouldn't know, because she doesn't appear in my life enough for me to recognize her.

I don't hear her speak that often. As I said, I didn't follow the Peterson circus. But the few times I endured the coverage, Allred seemed to monopolize the program, and she made an impression. Not a good one.

[Replaced_Texan]

I blindsided by the crud at some point last week. It took my voice and my ability to sleep for more than two hours at a time without suffocating. I had to do the wedding ceremony on Saturday in a combination of interpretive dance, mime, sign language and an odd croaking, since my voice was (and still is) inoperable. I'm single handedly keeping the Nyquil and tissue people in business, and I think I may have to check in to rehab once this illness is over.

But today, I'm here to warn you of a symptom that others will not understand and therefore mock, until they, too, are stricken: eyeball pain. A dull, throbbing, persistant ache right behind both eyeballs that no rubbing, blinking or other manipulation will alleviate.

From time to time you'll croak, write out or otherwise communicate to those around you the following phrase: M-y e-y-e-b-a-l-l h-u-r-t-s. They will look at you oddly and then go on talking about something other than your eyeball pain. Then, perhaps exactly five and a half days later, one who previously ignored your eyeball pain will call and--through a combination of moaning and wheezing and the aforementioned croaking--will inquire how long the eyeball pain lasts. To this, I reply: until you too develop the Nyquil dependency.

[ABBAKiss]

I fucking love Nyquil.

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
When firing someone, do you recommend an ice-breaker, like complimenting their hair-do?

Depends upon how scary your wife is.

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Fourth - Stepford Wives. Nicole Kidman looks luscious with dark hair and dark, urban nut-crusher clothes in the first 1/3.

Indeed she does. (Apropos of nothing, I love your phrase "dark, urban nut-crusher clothes" -- it's a perfect description for her look.)

Clearly, Matthew Broderick's character was one of those surveyed in the "men prefer dumb, submissive women" polls mentioned earlier.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by ABBAKiss
I fucking love Nyquil.

Dayquil, on the other hand, is a tragic waste of an odd shade of orange.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
Be very, very matter of fact, and very, very cold. You don't have to be mean but you are not the firee's shoulder to cry on, either.

I was involved in a firing in which we gave a laundry list of deficiencies (all pretty well documented, thank god). At one point, the firee nearly broke down and said "it sounds like you're saying I don't know how to do my job." My first inclination was to be gentle and sympathetic and say something like "no, that's not really it, it's just not a good fit" or some such bullshit. That kind of back-pedalling would not have been good. Thankfully, my more experienced and cold-blooded colleague cut in and said "yeah, that's basically what we're saying." Which was the right message at the time.

Sidd, one does not fire a hooker, one simply changes contractors.