A frolic in Cambodia

[Jack Manfred]

At my current job, I wouldn't want to burn bridges. I might even leave parting gifts for a few. I'd at least sponsor a happy hour.

I've reached a sense of peace about my former employer, so I wouldn't need to do anything over there. I had spent much time fostering scenarios about certain people there, but I don't think it would be worth the money.

Having said that, if I decided to be a vengeful rich man, I would totally outsource that stuff. I'd hire a dream team comprising members of Marsellus Wallace's pipe-hitting crew, some Russian mafia, some Sicilian mafia, Schillinger from Oz, an abnormal psych professor with flexible morals in need of some cash, and a leader who is one-part Pat Riley, one-part John Doe (Kevin Spacey from Se7en, not the lead singer of X), and one-part Hannibal Lecter. Of course, I wouldn't hire them directly. You need a good Kobayashi-type middle man for that type of thing. They deliver the videotape to him, he delivers it to me, I watch it once and then destroy it. Maybe I don't even watch it at all.

Like I said, I don't think about it now, but I have thought about it before.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Maybe I'll come sit on your desk.

TM

Under, not on.

Anne, where was the poop found (other than under my desk)?

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I know of quite a few stories involving nocturnal and / or drunken urination in places that are not traditionally considered urinals, but not deliberate bed shitting.

99% of the world (at least) is a urinal. Is this better than a parking lot? Your sister's bed?

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by dtb
If Fringey's interpretation of the baffling (to me, anyway) post is correct, does this mean the mad pooper wrote about his/her pooping activities using a piece of turd as a "pen"?

You need to spell these things out for me (preferably with a writing utensil that is not made of poo).

Turd. Poo. "Pen."

You are just too adorable for words!

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Jack Manfred
At my current job, I wouldn't want to burn bridges. I might even leave parting gifts for a few. I'd at least sponsor a happy hour.

I've reached a sense of peace about my former employer, so I wouldn't need to do anything over there. I had spent much time fostering scenarios about certain people there, but I don't think it would be worth the money.

Having said that, if I decided to be a vengeful rich man, I would totally outsource that stuff. I'd hire a dream team comprising members of Marsellus Wallace's pipe-hitting crew, some Russian mafia, some Sicilian mafia, Schillinger from Oz, an abnormal psych professor with flexible morals in need of some cash, and a leader who is one-part Pat Riley, one-part John Doe (Kevin Spacey from Se7en, not the lead singer of X), and one-part Hannibal Lecter. Of course, I wouldn't hire them directly. You need a good Kobayashi-type middle man for that type of thing. They deliver the videotape to him, he delivers it to me, I watch it once and then destroy it. Maybe I don't even watch it at all.

Like I said, I don't think about it now, but I have thought about it before.

That sounds like a lot of work and energy. As soon as I boarded the plane for my around the world erotic adventures, I'd forget all about the backstabbing insecure simpering wimps I'd left behind.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Under, not on.

Anne, where was the poop found (other than under my desk)?

All over. Hallways, offices, walls.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
Have mercy on the oppressed.

Lure their spouse away and adopt the children.

Make love, not war.

First spouse? No way.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by barely_legal
The worst thing I could do to my firm if I won the lottery would be to leave without cleaning out my office.

You're supposed to shit in other people's offices.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
99% of the world (at least) is a urinal. Is this better than a parking lot? Your sister's bed?

Specifically, I was thinking of a dryer and someone's bookshelf.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Specifically, I was thinking of a dryer and someone's bookshelf.

Hot radiator? Closet?

The whole peeing not-in-the-toilet thing is just weird, unless there REALLY is no toilet available.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Wow. Just, wow.

One of my college roommates got really drunk and shat in my closet one night -- I think he thought he was in the bathroom -- but he did not work for me or sleep with me, and he was pretty embarrassed about it later.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Hot radiator? Closet?

The whole peeing not-in-the-toilet thing is just weird, unless there REALLY is no toilet available.

You have so much to learn.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
That sounds like a lot of work and energy. As soon as I boarded the plane for my around the world erotic adventures, I'd forget all about the backstabbing insecure simpering wimps I'd left behind.

I think you mean "around-the-world." Or you could rephrase to "As soon as I boarded the plane to pursue exotic erotic adventures around the world, I'd forget . . . "

[The Dryer Thread]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Specifically, I was thinking of a dryer.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
You have so much to learn.

No; I'm quite aware that I should just give up and be a lesbian.