Fashion Board 12-09-03 through 1-08-04

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
...and you'll never have to wear rented formal wear again.

That is, you won't have to wear rented formal wear again (Hi, B&B's inner coke whore!) until (i) you add 20 pounds, probably as sympathy weight when Sequels becomes bloated with child; (ii) some idiot decides to dress the groomsmen in morning coats; or (iii) the invitation says "creative formal".

I believe there is no such thing as optional. It's a way of saying, "You don't HAVE to wear a tuxedo, you can just look like some forlorn simpleton if you want."

That having been said, there are people who can pull off dressing BETTER than a tux at one of these things, and, even more impressive, those who can pull off dressing like a total bum, though that generally requires massive wealth to really work.

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I tried to find the answer on the Stalin board's archives, but I could not locate it. New Year's event is "black tie optional". I've attended "black tie" events before, and this "optional" thing always pisses me off. Sequels wants me to wear a tux.* I want to wear a black suit

If she's wearing a floor-length gown, pony up and buy the tux. If she's wearing a cocktail-length dress, fine to go with the black suit so long as you don't wear some lawyer-drone business tie.

Never, ever, rent a tux. You'd feel far more at home in your own. And if you look good in three-button, why not get it? What, worried Joan "one more round of plastic surgery and my eyes will be pulled around the sides of my head" or Melissa "Mr. Ed" Rivers are gonna ridicule your ass on E! ?

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
New Year's event is "black tie optional".

I'm going to a New Year's event that is "clothing optional." I may nevertheless wear a black tie, at least before midnight.

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
I believe there is no such thing as optional. It's a way of saying, "You don't HAVE to wear a tuxedo, you can just look like some forlorn simpleton if you want."

Any assclown who puts "black tie optional" on an invite deserves to have guests show up in a diaper and top hat as Baby New Year. If you want people to wear tuxes, just show some spine and spit it out.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
I believe there is no such thing as optional. It's a way of saying, "You don't HAVE to wear a tuxedo, you can just look like some forlorn simpleton if you want."

New Year's Eve is Wednesday. Coltrane is on Chicago time so its 10 to noon, Monday. Unless something fits him off the rack, he ain't wearing a tux he buys.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy
That is, you won't have to wear rented formal wear again (Hi, B&B's inner coke whore!) until (i) you add 20 pounds, probably as sympathy weight when Sequels becomes bloated with child; (ii) some idiot decides to dress the groomsmen in morning coats; or (iii) the invitation says "creative formal".

(i) My dear husband gained weight between our wedding (when he purchased his tux) and the wedding of a friend 2 years later. A good tailor was able to let out his tux pants and jacket to accomodate the 4 inch gain in waist size. The same tailor recently took in the same tux back to almost its original size as husband has now lost the weight.

(ii) Again, at a certain age, this almost never happens. That said, Gentlemen, when you get married it would be nice if your bride were to say, "the groomsmen should wear black tuxedos and black accessories", or, if she must, she could choose ties, vests, cumberbunds etc. but still allow the groomsmen to wear their own tuxedos;

(iii) creative formal to me means a tuxedo with a rakish vest or colorful tie, cumberbund or suspenders. My father has a bow tie with blinking lights and a battery pack.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
New Year's Eve is Wednesday. Coltrane is on Chicago time so its 10 to noon, Monday. Unless something fits him off the rack, he ain't wearing a tux he buys.

I disagree. Tailoring can be done in a hurry. It'll just cost money.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
(iii) creative formal to me means a tuxedo with a rakish vest or colorful tie, cumberbund or suspenders. My father has a bow tie with blinking lights and a battery pack.

I like the diaper and top hot idea better.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by purse junkie
Any assclown who puts "black tie optional" on an invite deserves to have guests show up in a diaper and top hat as Baby New Year. If you want people to wear tuxes, just show some spine and spit it out.

Yes yes. I hate it too. It's a shitty invitation. Hating it will only just make me angry and I'm too busy being angry at the fuckos at Nordstrom - get the fuck out of my way...

[Can you hear me now?]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I tried to find the answer on the Stalin board's archives, but I could not locate it. New Year's event is "black tie optional". I've attended "black tie" events before, and this "optional" thing always pisses me off. Sequels wants me to wear a tux.* I want to wear a black suit

*I don't own a tux. I've been thinking about buying one. Folks on the Stalin board said to not buy a 2 or 3-button coat, but I look damn good in the 3-button. Will it go out of style that quickly?

I would recommend purchasing as you can amortize the investment over many years and functions but you had better hurry if you want it for NewYear'sEve, unless you can do the alterations yourself.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
I disagree. Tailoring can be done in a hurry. It'll just cost money.

Right. I can easily get it tailored in 1.5 days. I just hope that doesn't cost me an arm and a leg...

Or whatever family gathering that may have involved you.

I say to sister in law who is this beautiful Dane who was always quite plump but apparently lost 42 pounds "you look great!". response? "(pause), you look (pause) pretty good". but sh e was always kind ofa tactless ass.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Right. I can easily get it tailored in 1.5 days. I just hope that doesn't cost me an arm and a leg...

Obviously, because then you would need it tailored yet again to fit your new physique.

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
cost me an arm and a leg...

See? You'll save a couple of bucks right there.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Right. I can easily get it tailored in 1.5 days. I just hope that doesn't cost me an arm and a leg...

It will. But you should do it anyway.