Fashion Board 5-7-04 to 6-9-04

[SlaveNoMore]

Shape Shifter
Digging your pool? You can hire people to do this for you, you know.

Speaking of hiring people. And pools. And Girls Gone Wild Slip-n-Slides...

why does my Memo smell like chlorine.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
You said all the stuff that was dug up could be sold by the landscaping company for $25/yard? If it is worth $25/yard, people will come dig it up to get it for free.

Seems logical until you realize the landscaping company has ads in the yellow pages which people read when they need to buy dirt. I'm fairly certain most people in the city who are in the market for dirt aren't driving around random neighborhoods looking for signs that say "FREE DIRT." I could be wrong, but I'm fairly certain I'm not.

Plus, you are overlooking the aesthetic reasons for getting rid of it. Any other isolated comments of mine you'd like to take out of context and criticize?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
why does my Memo smell like chlorine.

I told him to do that Slavwe. After his blood tests came back like they did, it just seemed like a prudent measure.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Embellish, please.

Well, see, I have these oleanders in my back yard, and about a week ago I moved all of the ferns from another part of my back yard to under the oleanders, because I thought they'd look good. And I was right, they do look good. Now, I have this big empty space where the ferns were, and I think a lily pond would look good there, especially now that they have those solar powered pumps for the ponds and the prefab molded pond kits at Home Depot. I thought about the work involved, looked at the spot for awhile, and then decided that it was too much effort. I decided to get drunk at a crawfish boil instead.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
However, I do appreciate that you are posting.

That's something, I guess.

At any rate, it's funny when people claim other people are not funny and that their stories suck. I'm pretty sure we're all guilty of that 99% of the time. Some of the "funnier" people may have a 90% sucky-post ratio, but I wouldn't go much higher than that.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
Seems logical until you realize the landscaping company has ads in the yellow pages which people read when they need to buy dirt. I'm fairly certain most people in the city who are in the market for dirt aren't driving around random neighborhoods looking for signs that say "FREE DIRT." I could be wrong, but I'm fairly certain I'm not.

Plus, you are overlooking the aesthetic reasons for getting rid of it. Any other isolated comments of mine you'd like to take out of context and criticize?

Yes, you are correct, no one shops in the newspaper. They all go straight to the yellow pages. For example, people looking for furniture or pets invariably look up the listings in the yellow pages and never look in the paper.

If someone other than you came and dug it up and hauled it away, how is that different from you doing it?

You are just bitter because you made up that the $25 figure applied to all the stuff you dug up. You should have made your later statements correspond with that, or said that they'd be selling a bunch of it for $25/yard, or something. This is part of the reason your stories suck.

I don't think I took the $25/yard out of context. Their profiting from your manual labor was the insult piled upon your injury, and was therefore an integral part of your story. Without that part, it would just have been a story about sucky manual labor.

Perhaps the local community college has a class you could take in storytelling.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by taxwonk
My main thought on Lindsay Lohan is that it's a real shame she's only 17. If she looks like she's 30 at 17, it doens't bode well for her at 25. I wonder if it's something about life as an actress that ages these girls so fast, or if the industry picks them so young because they look like ingenues, so they just naturally aim for the girls who bloom brightly early on, but burn out like a nova by the time they turn adult?

Word is, she has smoked since age 15. This explains a lot. Also, her dad is white trash --- did jail time for some kind of white collar crime; the studio refers to him as an "investment banker" which is a funny euphemism for a crook. There was recently some kind of fight at her mom's house involving her dad --- an uncle required stitches/staples when dear ol' dad was done with him. Classy.

As for the ingenue theory, I hope not. Her breakthrough role was as the twins in "The Parent Trap" remake, in which she did reasonably well. Somehow, at the end of that movie I wanted to bang both Natasha Richardson the chick who played Meredith, but neither of the Lindsay Lohans.



Mostly I'm posting this to fuck with the people who are talking about banging a 17-year-old. I just hope LL is of age when they make a live-action Kim Possible movie. Rowr.

etfs.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
You said all the stuff that was dug up could be sold by the landscaping company for $25/yard? If it is worth $25/yard, people will come dig it up to get it for free.

{Sniff.} Smells like market theory. Take it to the PB, assjack.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
It's being held up over his no-trade clause and his insistence on the rights to a Sock-to-be-named-later

I don't think it's appropriate to negotiate through the press, so I'm not going to do that. But the socks are not the issue. I just want some assurances that they won't turn around and trade me to the Big Board or the Tax Board. I want to play for a winner.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Speaking of hiring people. And pools. And Girls Gone Wild Slip-n-Slides...

why does my Memo smell like chlorine.

It went through the typing pool, silly.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
Close, but no cigar.

At any rate, stop being so elitist. Some people enjoy working on their own property.

Ah, who am I kidding? My wife is a cheapskate and won't pay to have others do suc h work, especially when her father, who owns a construction company, is always willing to help for free. The catch is that I also have to help for free. Ugh.

At least she's always willing to give me a couple nice massages after she forces me to engage in heavy physical labor.

There was an article a few months back in the WSJ that had a little chart to help you calculate when a project is worth doing yourself. Bottom line: generally, once you make $40,000 a year or more, it's worthwhile to hire someone to mow the lawn. As in, life is too f---ing short to spend what little free time you have on yard work.

My point: your story is depressing. Please, man, for the love of god, buy a motorcycle or get arrested or something. You're killing me.

[Atticus Grinch]

Slave:
why does my Memo smell like chlorine.

Shape Shifter:
It went through the typing pool, silly.

I don't even know who you are anymore.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
more mud-slinging

Of course I'm bitter that they made me pay them to take it and that they are going to sell it in addition to that. I thought that was clear.

What I meant by "context" was that there were other reasons for us getting rid of the dirt right away and that your assertions that I was stupid for not advertising and selling it on my own didn't take those factors into consideration, namely there was no way in hell I was going to leave a huge pile of dirt in my driveway while I waited 2 days for the $20 ad to appear in the paper and another week or longer for someone to respond to it, especially considering it's supposed to continue raining for the next week or two and I didn't really want a mud slick in my driveway for that long.

God, I didn't think this thread could get more boring than it initially was, but I was wrong.

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Speaking of hiring people. And pools. And Girls Gone Wild Slip-n-Slides...

why does my Memo smell like chlorine.

Apropos of nothing, do you really have such a hat? And do you actually wear it? And do women (other than Ann Coulter) ever talk to you when you wear it?



By the way, here's the shot that I took of you and prima before the game last night. Your Elvis sneer is looking good, but prima's could use some work.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
There was an article a few months back in the WSJ that had a little chart to help you calculate when a project is worth doing yourself. bottom line: generally, once you make $40,000 a year or more, it's worthwhile to hire someone to mow the lawn. As in, life is too f---ing short to spend what little free time you have on yard work.

Didn't see the article, but another observable phenomenon is that DIYers usually don't save money on the project they plan to undertake --- they take what would otherwise have been budgeted for labor and unwittingly plow it into impulse-purchase finish upgrades (granite instead of Corian; Corian instead of tile, etc.). A project expands to reach the homeowner's overall ability to pay.

{Sniff.} Smells like market theory. Off to the PB with me!

etfs. Motherfuck!