General discussion - Mom and Dad Esq.

[Icky Thump]

Originally posted by Antiquity


Anyway, an awful situation, all the way around. Don't ever get pancreatic cancer.

:cry:

The worst. My wife's boss was in his 40s when it struck him. His one wish was to see his kids graduate high school. He was a wonderful man. It never happens to the bad ones.

[Icky Thump]

child abuse. Don't go there unless you want your kid to look like Timmy.

[viet_mom]

Originally posted by Antiquity
Thank you all for the posts above. I would have replied earlier, but there were weird problems with this sock.

The advice to spend as much time there as possible sounds right to me, and I'll be there as much as I can, given work and family constraints.

I'm going to take my kids up in a week or two, and, I'm still struggling with what to tell them. I would be inclined to say that she's sick, and that we're very worried, and to leave it at that. I've read about kids with terminal illnesses and about how they deal with the fact much better than adults expect, but I think telling the kids that she's going to die soon would make it worse for them. But my mother is saying essentially this to friends and family alike. I can't really tell (or expect) her and others to hold their tongues while my kids are around, and if they're going to hear it maybe it would be better to hear it from me in a planned way instead of overhearing something and putting the pieces together themselves.

Anyway, an awful situation, all the way around. Don't ever get pancreatic cancer.

:cry:

I am so sorry for this awful thing to happen to you and your family!!! Great advice on here. I would just add this: you might want to observe hidden concerns of your kids about the same thing happening to you. A family member died a few weeks ago and Vietbabe started asking about other deaths - why did the cat die, why did Grandpa's mommy die (this happened well before Vietbabe was born). I told her b/c they were sick and also, old, yadda yadda. She was acting strange one day and I finally got her to say what was on her mind -- she was concerned that I would also get sick (she didn't say it, but obviously concerned that I would die). So I think you want to reassure your kids - who knows what on their minds if they don't tell us? They might think your poor Mom's cancer is some kind of plague that is going to snare you or your spouse. Or them.

[Antiquity]

Originally posted by viet_mom
I am so sorry for this awful thing to happen to you and your family!!! Great advice on here. I would just add this: you might want to observe hidden concerns of your kids about the same thing happening to you. A family member died a few weeks ago and Vietbabe started asking about other deaths - why did the cat die, why did Grandpa's mommy die (this happened well before Vietbabe was born). I told her b/c they were sick and also, old, yadda yadda. She was acting strange one day and I finally got her to say what was on her mind -- she was concerned that I would also get sick (she didn't say it, but obviously concerned that I would die). So I think you want to reassure your kids - who knows what on their minds if they don't tell us? They might think your poor Mom's cancer is some kind of plague that is going to snare you or your spouse. Or them.

This sounds like good advice.

We traveled to see my mom a few weeks ago. The morning after we got there, she was not feeling well at all, and we took her to the hospital. She's been there ever since, and she there's for the duration, which won't be long. I've been with her since then, spending my waking hours in the hospital room (and I'm sitting next to her bed now). My wife took the kids back to our place a while ago now, so I basically haven't seen them in a few weeks, save for one visit to the hospital room. I'm sure they are quite concerned, and will be even more so with the news that will bring me home, but for the moment it falls to my wife to help them.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Antiquity
This sounds like good advice.

We traveled to see my mom a few weeks ago. The morning after we got there, she was not feeling well at all, and we took her to the hospital. She's been there ever since, and she there's for the duration, which won't be long. I've been with her since then, spending my waking hours in the hospital room (and I'm sitting next to her bed now). My wife took the kids back to our place a while ago now, so I basically haven't seen them in a few weeks, save for one visit to the hospital room. I'm sure they are quite concerned, and will be even more so with the news that will bring me home, but for the moment it falls to my wife to help them.

okay, kids may be worried about your feeling. let them know you're sad, but that you have great memories of her. ask them their favorite memories of her. let them know how lucky they are to have known her and that some kids don't know their grandparents.

[Anon Parent]

Had an ultrasound today at 7 weeks. Anyone have advice on fraternal twins? Pregnancy, childhood, college investments?

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Anon Parent
Had an ultrasound today at 7 weeks. Anyone have advice on fraternal twins? Pregnancy, childhood, college investments?

Pick the one you like.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Anon Parent
Had an ultrasound today at 7 weeks. Anyone have advice on fraternal twins? Pregnancy, childhood, college investments?

There's a former poster with twin five year old girls that I can put you in touch with if you want to PM me.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by Anon Parent
Had an ultrasound today at 7 weeks. Anyone have advice on fraternal twins? Pregnancy, childhood, college investments?

If this is ABBA I am going to cry.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
If this is ABBA I am going to cry.

there goes my guess.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by taxwonk
there goes my guess.

Hell, no. If it was me, I'd do way more than cry.

[Atticus Grinch]

Sign that your children might be getting too much religious education: "Daddy, is there The Berenstain Bears Get Crucified?"

Sign, in the same conversation, that they might not be getting enough: "Daddy, is there The Berenstain Bears Get Into a Knife Fight?"

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by Anon Parent
Had an ultrasound today at 7 weeks. Anyone have advice on fraternal twins? Pregnancy, childhood, college investments?

Bill Simmons:

• That reminds me, somebody needs to launch a Web site for anyone thinking about having two or more kids. The Web site would be called "Why Didn't You Effing Tell Me?" and would include the following features:
  
  # The "Why Didn't You Effing Tell Me?" Blog, in which dads rip into their buddies for not warning them to stick with one kid.
  
  # A quote page of deranged things said by mothers melting down as both of their kids were crying at the same time; stuff like, "I swear to God, I'm going to stick this baby in the microwave soon and defrost him!" and "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU WANTED TWO, I WISH YOU WERE DEAD!!!!"
  
  # A detailed explanation of my buddy Sully's 12 Percent Theory, which can be described in one sentence like this: "Assuming women start out at 100 percent on the Sanity Scale, every time she passes a living being out of her body, she becomes 12 percent less sane." By the way, this is why Hillary Clinton can run for president -- she only had one kid, so she's operating at 88 percent capacity. Still much higher than George W. Bush.
  
  # Transcripts of incoherent shouting matches between sleep-deprived parents.
  
  # Live webcams featuring streaming video inside the living rooms of families with two or more kids. And before anyone decides to have a second kid, by federal law, they'd have to spend three hours surfing around this Web site.

[Secret_Agent_Man]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
Bill Simmons:

That reminds me, somebody needs to launch a Web site for anyone thinking about having two or more kids. The Web site would be called "Why Didn't You Effing Tell Me?" and would include the following features:

Funny. It was a big adjustment.

S_A_M

[viet_mom]

Originally posted by Antiquity
This sounds like good advice.

We traveled to see my mom a few weeks ago. The morning after we got there, she was not feeling well at all, and we took her to the hospital. She's been there ever since, and she there's for the duration, which won't be long. I've been with her since then, spending my waking hours in the hospital room (and I'm sitting next to her bed now). My wife took the kids back to our place a while ago now, so I basically haven't seen them in a few weeks, save for one visit to the hospital room. I'm sure they are quite concerned, and will be even more so with the news that will bring me home, but for the moment it falls to my wife to help them.

How are you doing over there?