Fashion Board 1-08-04 through 02-03-04

[bilmore]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I actually didn't mind the cold. In fact, I played naked. And wet. And when I was on the sidelines, I found some metal to lick.

Good lord. You are my progeny.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I actually didn't mind the cold. In fact, I played naked. And wet. And when I was on the sidelines, I found some metal to lick.

Originally posted by bilmore
Good lord. You are my progeny.

And the really bad news was that the metal was still attached to that cute twink from spin class.

[pretermitted_child]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Get a new avatar. Just a thought. I'm thinking, maybe with a Native American headdress?

Because we all know that ltl has impeccable taste in avatars, how about this one, Hank?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by pretermitted_child
Because we all know that ltl has impeccable taste in avatars, how about this one, Hank?

NO! Not funny. Mine.

[Atticus Grinch]

In further proof of the adage that there hasn't been an attractive Con Law plaintiff since Dred Scott, the guy who lost the informational stop DUI case before the Supreme Court last week got sentenced for another DUI he committed in the meantime. {Chicago Sun-Times.}

In other Supreme Court hilarity, the guy who couldn't remember Justice Ginsburg's name during oral argument gets his comeuppance. {NY Lawyer.}

Oh, and a Dewey Ballantine partner just embroiled his firm in an Asian racism scandal. Again. {NY Law Journal --- warning: contains Morrisettian use of term "ironic" by BIGLAW partner.}

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Get a new avatar. Just a thought. I'm thinking, maybe with a Native American headdress?

I know you like to tease, but sometimes I wonder if you realize how hurtful you can be. An avatar choice, at least a wise one, is a deeply thought out personal choice. There is typically alot of personal, and sometimes emotional committment to the choice. Your repeated attacks on my avatar hurt, this is not constructive criticism. Your's is simply unfounded criticism; I suppose you do it to give a laugh to the others, but realize that here you cause only bewilderment and insecurity. I am hurt.
And so you know, the image is of my grandfather, who passed recently.

[Alex_de_Large]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I don't see why you are so stressed out. Is the license plate on the car in AdL's thingy a Maryland plate?

Sure is... Was that you, Balta?

Originally posted by Fashionable But Anonymous
Yes, me. Probably the best orgasm ever.

clarification please. by two penises (penii?)?

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
That look is apparently VERY fashionable among wealthy 20-and 30-something women in the greater Philadelphia area who walk around shopping in velour tracksuits, carrying LV purses, and wearing really expensive sunglasses, even when it's fucking FREEZING outside. I am very glad that Mrs. dL finds this trend as imbecilic as I.

Have you ever been to Boca? There are swarms of decrepit old women in sweatsuits draped in huge jewelry roaming all over the place like locusts. The really gross thing about it is that those track suits are so unforgiving that only people who actually go to the gym - a lot - should wear them.

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Why is it that "fat people are disgusting and gross" and "ugly people should die" are on monthly, or even weekly, rotation, but double-penetration is only on once a year at most?

I think Sonny is our next american idol. he is rubenesque.

spoiler

















why was the fat chick dismissed as sweet but not good enough (the one who sang son of a preacher man) and the fat guy who was no better of a singer allowed to proceed? Now, I am as much of a fatist as the next thin spinster, but the buck stops when it is sexist fatism.

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I hear ya. Sometimes when I'm nailing the Mrs I think to myself "I wonder if she's phoning in this performance... I know I sometimes do..." and then there's other times when the sex is hot and I think "Shit, now I know why I married this chick." Everybody goes through the "Fuck, I can't bang this same person for the rest of my days" blues once in a while. Its part of the pain/pleasure tightrope of modern life. I think I'd have been much happier if I wer born a plant.

I wonder if Mrs. Fly ever gets tired of fucking Mr. Fly. Does Mr. Fly have a sellby date that forces Mrs. Fly to phone it in to keep her from spinsterhood?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I wonder if Mrs. Fly ever gets tired of fucking Mr. Fly. Does Mr. Fly have a sellby date that forces Mrs. Fly to phone it in to keep her from spinsterhood?

Paigow, quit agonizing over the future. Just pull the trigger on mailing the invitations, and go buy a dress. Sebastian also has problems being a lawyer, and you're able to not buy into that.

Originally posted by paigowprincess
clarification please. by two penises (penii?)?

Yes, two penises, attached to two separate men. I am a woman.

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by Dave
There you were, given carte blanche to lie your ass off -- isn't that the dictionary definition of "embellish"? -- thereby enhancing your FB reputation, and instead you took the high road.

I'm not sure whether I'm impressed or disappointed.

ETA: Given the most likely reasons to read this board, I'm going with disappointed. Details, even if fake, are good.

You feel I need to enhance my reputation on the FB? For what? Being stodgy and refusing to give any exact details on my sex life despite begging to the contrary?

Ok, lets see. Sometimes, lesbians, when they have sex, they use toys ok? And there are, in fact, lesbians who enjoy having anal sex (strange but true I know.) A dear friend of mine, who is, not surprisingly, a lesbian, decided to tell me recently about an experience she had that was new to her and I will, for your sick little minds, retell it here.

Leagl, she said to me, I had the most amazing sex last night with so and so (so and so being someone I know as well who has a reputation for bedding most everything that is female and moves.) Leagl, she said to me, I must have had 5 or 6 orgasms in the space of a few minutes, it was amazing. My curiosity peaked I inquired as to the technique that caused this result. (This is of course not a quote but a summary. There were many hand gestures involved, alas I cannot possibly reconstruct those here.)

Well, rather breathlessly, she said, we were in bed, and I had gone down on her and we were just sort of laying there catching our breath when she asked me if I was interested in trying something different. Of course, knowing her reputation for being amazing in bed, I was willing to try almost anything she could think of, so I said sure. She got up (Leagl you think her ass looks good in jeans? I have to tell you, naked - even better) and went to one of her drawers and pulled out two items. One it turned out, was a vibrator, the other was a dildo. She greased them both up, put one in my pussy (the vibrator) and the other one in my ass (the dildo.) She then proceeded to, at varying speeds, fuck me with both of them. OH MY GOD, it was amazing. You should try it. Really. No. Stop laughing at me Leagl. You are such a fucking bitch.

So there you go. Sebbie asked if we knew someone, I said I did, because, in fact, I did. Though I don't know if it counts as old school.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by leagleaze
Though I don't know if it counts as old school.

It counts as a hell of a lot better story than FbA's. So far, at least.