Drive fast, live hard, no regrets... Sorry Penske

[nononono]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Even if he uses lots of lube?

Eh, he was rude, so yeah. Besides, too much, and it's just overkill.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
I pulled it up, and it was the size and appearance of my beloved dachsund/pappillon. I wrestled with it, and it bit me, and I tried to choke it, but then decided that I was being stupid, and let it go.

***

So Joseph, what do you make of this dream?

Flinty beat (tee hee!) all of us to the joke here.

I had a dream a couple of weeks ago that I haven't gotten around to sharing with the Board. This one had no recently departed news anchors -- it was populated entirely of FB people.

I was riding on a bus with Sequels. Coltrane and Sebby had just died engaging in a heroic ocean rescue (although those rescuers perished, the victims survived), and Sequels was devastated. As we rode along toward our undetermined destination, I consoled her while she wept over her lost love and the wedding and the family that was never to be. As I was tut-tutting and telling Sequels how much Coltrane loved her (all the while holding back my tears over my lost internet love, out of deference to his beloved wife), the bus driver piped up and said, in a snarky tone, "Don't listen to her sentimental crap. Coltrane had cold feet, big time, and only proposed because you were both hitting thirty and he saw the ultimatum on the wall."

I turned to see that it was Piagow driving the bus. She had a cigarette hanging out of her mouth and was wearing a getup you might see on Stevie Nicks, if she were homeless. Lots of chiffon and whatnot. She had her left foot, which was shod in a high-heeled strappy sandal, up on the dash, which was curious because the bus had a manual transmission.

I turned my attention away from the driver and back to Sequels, to whom I said, "Don't listen to her, she's crazy, and bitter because Coltrane was never her internet boyfriend. Coltrane really loved you. He said that you were the only woman he'd ever dated whom he wanted to be with exclusively. If you don't believe me, ask Gwinky, DTB, and Fringey."

I think Sequels was consoled, but at that point my attention was again distracted, this time by the fact that the bus was headed straight for the river. At this point I noticed empty Shiraz bottles and wine-filled chocolate boxes on the bus floor, and I called out, "Who the fuck let Paigow drive the fucking bus?"

As the river drew ever closer, and I pondered how the newspaper headline would convey the painful irony of Sequels's perishing in a water-related accident so soon after losing her fiance to a water rescue (and how my love affair with Sebby would never be acknowledged) I realized, with great relief, that we were riding on one of those duck tour buses.

When I got off in front of the Lincoln Memorial, Thurgreed was there to meet me, and the first thing he said was, "Who the fuck let Paigow drive the fucking bus?"

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by nononono
Hey, don't besmirch my name like that. I'm not confused and I've no hope PLF knows, but he did imply he did, so, trying to be accommodating, I asked.

Hank, your Beefeaters is showing.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by nononono
Eh, he was rude, so yeah. Besides, too much, and it's just overkill.

I would think better overkill than underkill.

[nononono]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Hank, your Beefeaters is showing.

Shit, you got me.

Holy hell, so much paranoia.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
When would one wear the camo -type battle gear as opposed to whatever other type of battle gear there is?

Why don't you consult the Military Regulations on Uniforms?

There's different colored camo for different environments, and you presumably want to wear the right one. And then there are snow suits and stuff like that.

Since it's fashion week, do you have a battle uniform proposal that you want evaluated?

In the end, though, I assume your commanding officer will tell you. That, or whatever you're issued. Do you think I'm in the military? Don't you know some ex-mil. guys? It might be a good pick up line: "So what do you wear under your camo?"

[nononono]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I would think better overkill than underkill.

Maybe if it's the warming kind.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Why don't you consult the Military Regulations on Uniforms?

There's different colored camo for different environments, and you presumably want to wear the right one. And then there are snow suits and stuff like that.

Since it's fashion week, do you have a battle uniform proposal that you want evaluated?

In the end, though, I assume your commanding officer will tell you. That, or whatever you're issued. Do you think I'm in the military? Don't you know some ex-mil. guys? It might be a good pick up line: "So what do you wear under your camo?"

My original comment stemmed from the mixing of the jungle-looking camo with the desert-looking camo. It would seem to undermine the whole point of camo, which I think is to provide camoflage. And it was meant to be funny. Geez. Cranky.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Why don't you consult the Military Regulations on Uniforms?

There's different colored camo for different environments, and you presumably want to wear the right one. And then there are snow suits and stuff like that.

Since it's fashion week, do you have a battle uniform proposal that you want evaluated?

In the end, though, I assume your commanding officer will tell you. That, or whatever you're issued. Do you think I'm in the military? Don't you know some ex-mil. guys? It might be a good pick up line: "So what do you wear under your camo?"

Do you know where I can get a Lieutenant's dress uniform?

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Why don't you consult the Military Regulations on Uniforms?

There's different colored camo for different environments, and you presumably want to wear the right one. And then there are snow suits and stuff like that.

Since it's fashion week, do you have a battle uniform proposal that you want evaluated?

In the end, though, I assume your commanding officer will tell you. That, or whatever you're issued. Do you think I'm in the military? Don't you know some ex-mil. guys? It might be a good pick up line: "So what do you wear under your camo?"

I thought we went over this. It's commando and if you have to ask, they'll probably laugh her out of the bar.
If you're out on the field, it's camo. Beige or green depending on jungle or desert. I think the snow gear is just outer wear.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Nobody told me this kid is a newber! I tend to reserve my particular brand of bitchy hate for the washed-up old skool hacks, while at the same time welcoming the newbers with my particular brand of tender love and loving tenderness.

Welcome aboard, newber! As I'm sure you will soon see, this place is much like a cocktail party, albeit a cocktail party that lasts several years with exactly the same guests (most of whom are turn-your-face-away-in-horror drunk) and exactly the same conversations (which comfortingly occur in a prescribed order). Anyhoo, my point being that, as with any cocktail party, it is best to mingle a bit and listen in on the conversations before jumping in with your own contributions. It is no coincidence that some of the most popular and successful first-time posters have also been long-time lurkers.

With respect to your camouflage comment . . . well, you caught me! I am forced to admit that camouflage does indeed have as at least one of its purposes the camouflage function. Although that is not actually how it got its name . . . .

You've already shown your true colors and blown it, kityy-boy. She's not going to fall for the nicey-nice act now. Crawl back to your sandbox and try to rub out the dingleberries.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Flinty beat (tee hee!) all of us to the joke here.

I had a dream a couple of weeks ago that I haven't gotten around to sharing with the Board. This one had no recently departed news anchors -- it was populated entirely of FB people.

I was riding on a bus with Sequels. Coltrane and Sebby had just died engaging in a heroic ocean rescue (although those rescuers perished, the victims survived), and Sequels was devastated. As we rode along toward our undetermined destination, I consoled her while she wept over her lost love and the wedding and the family that was never to be. As I was tut-tutting and telling Sequels how much Coltrane loved her (all the while holding back my tears over my lost internet love, out of deference to his beloved wife), the bus driver piped up and said, in a snarky tone, "Don't listen to her sentimental crap. Coltrane had cold feet, big time, and only proposed because you were both hitting thirty and he saw the ultimatum on the wall."

I turned to see that it was Piagow driving the bus. She had a cigarette hanging out of her mouth and was wearing a getup you might see on Stevie Nicks, if she were homeless. Lots of chiffon and whatnot. She had her left foot, which was shod in a high-heeled strappy sandal, up on the dash, which was curious because the bus had a manual transmission.

I turned my attention away from the driver and back to Sequels, to whom I said, "Don't listen to her, she's crazy, and bitter because Coltrane was never her internet boyfriend. Coltrane really loved you. He said that you were the only woman he'd ever dated whom he wanted to be with exclusively. If you don't believe me, ask Gwinky, DTB, and Fringey."

I think Sequels was consoled, but at that point my attention was again distracted, this time by the fact that the bus was headed straight for the river. At this point I noticed empty Shiraz bottles and wine-filled chocolate boxes on the bus floor, and I called out, "Who the fuck let Paigow drive the fucking bus?"

As the river drew ever closer, and I pondered how the newspaper headline would convey the painful irony of Sequels's perishing in a water-related accident so soon after losing her fiance to a water rescue (and how my love affair with Sebby would never be acknowledged) I realized, with great relief, that we were riding on one of those duck tour buses.

When I got off in front of the Lincoln Memorial, Thurgreed was there to meet me, and the first thing he said was, "Who the fuck let Paigow drive the fucking bus?"

Owning a dachsund usually means repressed homosexuality, unless he owns one IRL.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Do you know where I can get a Lieutenant's dress uniform?

You'd look good in this.


Or are you talking old skool?

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Was it str8 on Pyramid or Hank on Cops?

It was actually me declining to walk away with the $100,000 my four-person team had already won on Greed, risking it in an attempt to answer the $200,000 question, despite the fact that we were told the question was going to be in a category that could not have been worse for me --- ballroom dancing.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Don't count on Wilde and Parker any time soon. But soon enough we should get a Guernica post.

Wilde and Parker caught the last train to Clarksville long ago. If you're lucky, though, every once in a while, someone will pull an Alexander Wollcott or a Henry Kauffman out of em's ass.