Fashion Board 3-5-04 to 4-6-04

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Which reminds me of a story. We were out one day looking for chlorine and pH test kit for the hot tub. We had just left Rich's spa and stove and husband sees "Crystal Spa" across the street. We walk into the place and all there is is a front counter with a large one way mirror behind it and a locked door next to it. I say "I don't think they have chlorine here." This very polite asian lady in a silk robe walks out. Husband (foolish man) asks her if she has any chlorine. She giggles, says "no we don't sell anything here."

Your story lacks an ending.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Your story lacks an ending.

I doubt it was a happy one.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I doubt it was a happy one.

Yeah, that's extra...

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Every BP should be full service and have an oriental spa attached to it. Happy Endings indeed. It would bring a whole new meaning to "two-pump chump"...

The new BP Connect platform has the spa feature as an option. It's being test-marketed in Bangkok. More details to follow as necessary.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Your story lacks an ending.

Ending A) We say thanks, leave the premises, call the police, watch the news later that night to see Mel Gibson, who had been missing for days, being led out of the building after having been kidnapped and held for ransom.

Ending B) We say "you're lying. We know you're selling something here and it's not just massages. So how much for the group tongue massage?"

Ending C) We bust through the door, Charlies Angels style. High kicking and karate chopping our way through the masked employees of the world's biggest X lab. We see Zorin getting ready to take off in his blimp. We fire, shoot down the blimp. 007 slides down the satellite dish with his hot russian spy. We capture Zorin and humanity is safe again.

[leagleaze]

I know you were all very concerned about my hunt for a media cabinet. I purchased the below, hopefully it will look ok. If not, well, I will continue the hunt.

[NotFromHere]

Ack. A woman in Mexico gave birth to a healthy baby boy after performing a Caesarean section on herself with a kitchen knife.

She took three small glasses of hard liquor and, using a kitchen knife, sliced her abdomen in three attempts ... and delivered a male infant that breathed immediately and cried.

I'm sure that it's not in me to cut myself open regardless of how many shots of alcohol I've had. Plus the knives in my kitchen are so freakin dull I'd probably bleed to death and get salmonella.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4677630/

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Plus the knives in my kitchen are so freakin dull I'd probably bleed to death and get salmonella.

Even your kitchen knives are dull. Heh.

[SlaveNoMore]

From an idiot selling on Ebay

Hi your looking at an Authentic BOSTON RED SOX home jersey #42 w/ Mo VAUGHN name on it. It has the RUSSELL ATHLETIC logo on the right sleeve also bottom left and of course the neck. Size 52 (XL-XXL)This is quite a few years old but it is in GREAT condition very clean and WHITE and all the stitching is still tight. This is USED jersey only worned by myself,only a few times in the summers that have gone by. I wore it last maybe three years ago sent to cleaners and kept in a bag along with others. It has been stored in a SMOKE-FREE Home. I'm a huge baseball fan and even though I'm a Boston native I have a few dozen jersey's by different teams. I dont were them any longer so my lost is your gain. Now if your wandering with the prices My fellow ebay'ers that have similar listing stating Authentic they are but are not selling what the players in the league ACTUALLY were when there in the field. Watch carefully a couple of games and you will see.The Sox the Have only worn RUSSELL as there major apparel for many years.The exceptions are the Mariners and White Sox wich now use MAJESTIC as a brand all year around and the PRE SEASON Jersey's wich all teams use by Majestic also.Now the prices of these jersey BRAND NEW retail for without name and number $110.00-$130.00 and WITH name and number $150.00-$175.00.Now of course these like stated are PRE-WORNED so bidding will start low but don't forget they are very COLLECTIBLE items and sought after

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by leagleaze
I know you were all very concerned about my hunt for a media cabinet. I purchased the below, hopefully it will look ok. If not, well, I will continue the hunt.

I think that rather than the greek vase on top, you should buy one of these. Class it up, if you will:

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Ending A) We say thanks, leave the premises, call the police, watch the news later that night to see Mel Gibson, who had been missing for days, being led out of the building after having been kidnapped and held for ransom.

Ending B) We say "you're lying. We know you're selling something here and it's not just massages. So how much for the group tongue massage?"

Ending C) We bust through the door, Charlies Angels style. High kicking and karate chopping our way through the masked employees of the world's biggest X lab. We see Zorin getting ready to take off in his blimp. We fire, shoot down the blimp. 007 slides down the satellite dish with his hot russian spy. We capture Zorin and humanity is safe again.

What is sad is that none of those are even good endings.

[Oliver_Wendell_Ramone]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Plus the knives in my kitchen are so freakin dull I'd probably bleed to death and get salmonella.

See, now that's a happy ending.

[sunnybunny]

Originally posted by leagleaze
I know you were all very concerned about my hunt for a media cabinet. I purchased the below, hopefully it will look ok. If not, well, I will continue the hunt.

Good find Leagle...where did you get it?

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
From an idiot selling on Ebay [drivel from Red Sox fan deleted]

Right. Because a search of Yankee items for sale on Ebay won't reveal any similar idiocy.

But I digress. It's baseball season, and time for Yankee Schadenfreude Haiku once again!

Moose has do-over
0 and 1 versus Tampa?
You know Boss is pissed.

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

For various reasons not worth going into, I was hunting about the internet for amusing T-shirts. I found this, which could well be the board's official T-shirt.



http://tshirtsthatbite.home.comcast.net/gay.htm