Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03 - Page 1013

ms. naughty diplomat · 07-25-2003, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Yeah, kill the guy with the ball. I've discerned a few more, too. 1) The guy running with the ball has to bounce it off the ground (dribble it) ever 5 meters or so.
2) If he gets tackled, he has to give it up (which is why you throw it)
3) throw backwards only, but kick in any direction
4) if you catch a kick inside the 25m(?) box, you get a free kick on goal
5) six points between the two middle uprights; one point if it goes between the middle and side upright on either side
6) if you get a 6-pt goal, they bounce it up at midfield. A 1-pt goal means the team that gave up the goal gets the ball at its own goal.
7) they also bounce it up if the ball goes out of bounds.

But the rules really don't matter, because it's such a damn entertaining game.

if you really want to know: GUIDE TO AUSTRALIAN FOOTBALL

they actually officially call the rules, "the laws of the game." how cool is that?

str8outavannuys · 07-25-2003, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
I played some in college, of the intramural variety. It was moderately fun, and a really good workout. You pretty much run the whole time, unlike soccer, where the strikers usually dog it when the ball's in their own half of the field. But I never really saw much in the way of strategy (other than score more than the other team), which there is in soccer, football, and other sports (of course, IM sports aren't usually highly strategic).

Beyond that, I've never understood the culture of ultimate. (although maybe if I needed to do something between bong hits I would.) Like anything in college, there's one group of people who are really into it; that wasn't me. And I personally didn't get why people were--it's one of those games that's fun to play once in a while, but I'd never watch it on television or pay to see it in person, or support my child to become a world-champion ultimate player. Of course, I don't get beach volleyball, but that was huge for a period of years too. And I always wished (european) handball was played more regularly in the US.

European Handball is unplayable and unwatchable. But this is from a long time Ultimate player, so it just goes to show you.

POLL: What's the least essential sport (defined for these purposes as competition requiring physical exertion (card games/board games do not count) in which a winner is decided by either objective or subjective criteria (most points, who looks best jumping around on skates)?

I'll take the first shot and say field hockey. Far too many whistles for no apparent reason. European handball comes a close second. Pass, pass, pass, pass, hurl self at goalie and fling ball. Repeat * infinity. Third choice is ringette, which would be far and away the winner if anybody played it anymore.

Ultimate has the virtues of a) lots and lots of running, b) it requires development of unique skills that are fun and challenging to master, c) it's cool to see people abusing their own bodies to such an extent, d) the no-refs/spirit of the game element, e) it's very often played co-ed, and f) the people who play it are generally very nice people.

str8

ThrashersFan · 07-25-2003, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ms. naughty diplomat
if you really want to know: GUIDE TO AUSTRALIAN FOOTBALL

they actually officially call the rules, "the laws of the game." how cool is that?

Outstanding. They have club songs -- I thought I was imagining that opposing fans were trying to outsing each other. That is so cool ---

Sidd Finch · 07-25-2003, 02:07 PM

So you assume that most fat people follow the paradigm of your fucked up family, instead of the paradigm of your happy-to-be -fat secretary?

Perhaps you watch too much Oprah. Most people I know are fully aware of the reasons they are fat.

leagleaze · 07-25-2003, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Translation: I'm hungry.

TM

Sure am, want to share my yogurt and pineapple lunch?

Mmmm.

Replaced_Texan · 07-25-2003, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Here are the rules. Bunch of guys play a game on what looks like a football field. Try to kill the guy carrying the ball, or at least kick his ass. You can throw or kick the ball to some other schmuck if it looks like you are going to be killed. If that schmuck gets it over the line, you pick a number between 1 and 20 and that's your score. Then you kick the ball and whoever gets it starts running and the fun resumes. In other words, I have watched this thing many times and have tried to figure it out, but sadly I don't get the scoring or the strategy. Much like cricket.

No no. Not like cricket. Cricket is the most mindnumbingly boring sport ever invented. The only thing that makes cricket bearable is if they bribe you with Pimms to stay out there for three hours straight waiting for something to happen. At least something of interest is happening in Australian Rules. Cricket? Nada.

Sidd Finch · 07-25-2003, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
European Handball is unplayable and unwatchable. But this is from a long time Ultimate player, so it just goes to show you.

I like Ultimate and used to play a lot in college. I think playing after you're 25 is fundamentally wrong, for reasons I can't explain.

But Euro Handball is a cool sport. Very fast paced, very intensely physical. Sort of like basketball, but you don't have to be freakishly tall to be good.

I did have the advantage of learning the sport from a camp counselor who was an international star in the sport -- it always helps to see and learn from the best.

Replaced_Texan · 07-25-2003, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Yeah, kill the guy with the ball. I've discerned a few more, too. 2) If he gets tackled, he has to give it up (which is why you throw it)
3) throw backwards only, but kick in any direction

Hmm. these three items are rugby princples too. I'm seeing a pattern.

I think, without a doubt, the best part of Aussie Rules football is the umpire guys indicating that there's a score.

Who's Your Puft Daddy? · 07-25-2003, 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by leagleaze
yogurt and pineapple lunch?

fat person response: what are you, nuts?

Go get a Big Mac value meal, and tell 'em to SUPERSIZE that muhfudder.

NotFromHere · 07-25-2003, 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
No no. Not like cricket. Cricket is the most mindnumbingly boring sport ever invented. The only thing that makes cricket bearable is if they bribe you with Pimms to stay out there for three hours straight waiting for something to happen. At least something of interest is happening in Australian Rules. Cricket? Nada.

I'm just saying...I have watched Cricket, had it explained to me, I still don't get it. Same with AR Football, watched it, had it explained, don't get it. However, total agreement as to which one is fun to watch regardless of knowing the rules.

Replaced_Texan · 07-25-2003, 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys

POLL: What's the least essential sport (defined for these purposes as competition requiring physical exertion (card games/board games do not count) in which a winner is decided by either objective or subjective criteria (most points, who looks best jumping around on skates)?

See above, Cricket.

leagleaze · 07-25-2003, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Who's Your Puft Daddy?
Go get a Big Mac value meal, and tell 'em to SUPERSIZE that muhfudder.

Ugh. I have to admit, no clue how anyone can eat that stuff. It makes me feel sick.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) · 07-25-2003, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
. . .
4) if you catch a kick inside the 25m(?) box, you get a free kick on goal
. . . .

After a quick look at the Laws, it appears I have this wrong. You get a free kick if a defender manhandles you anywhere. Apparently never in the history of the game (well, with me watching) has a player caught a ball within this area and not been manhandled, thus entitling him to a free kick.

Greedy,Greedy,Greedy · 07-25-2003, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys

POLL: What's the least essential sport (defined for these purposes as competition requiring physical exertion (card games/board games do not count) in which a winner is decided by either objective or subjective criteria (most points, who looks best jumping around on skates)?

I've been trying to get Gwinky to go curling with me, but no interest. How 'bout you, st8?

str8outavannuys · 07-25-2003, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by W.W.L.D.
Without fatties, there would be no
fat chicks in party hats

The name says it all, you smug fat fucker.

Well now we know what Cliff Yablonski has been up to.

For those confused, http://www.somethingawful.com/cliff/ihateyou/

(Pictures and snide remarks purportedly written by a crusty old vet about how much he hates everyone he knows)

That also reminds me of the most inexplicable thing I've ever seen on the net. The Loser Living Upstairs.

http://www.geocities.com/SouthBeach/...427/loser.html

Warning: it's Geocities. Another warning: it's long and there's no earthly reason why anyone would have written this. But it's strangely addictive.

These classic links brought to you by Str8