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Old 08-01-2003, 11:47 AM   #16261
Did you just call me Coltrane?
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Hey Tour Freaks

Quote:
Originally posted by purse junkie
The Tour is by far the most difficult sporting event on earth and the most demanding in terms of pure athleticism, stamina and strength. I cannot think of any other sport than remotely comes close.
I'll give you stamina. That's about it.

Running takes more athleticism than cycling, and you can have no athletic ability whatsoever and be a good runner...
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Old 08-01-2003, 11:48 AM   #16262
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Hey Tour Freaks

Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
From EVERY single (unverified) source that I have, from people who have met him to just plain rumours, all have said that Lance is a fucking prick...
A friend of mine went to a children's cancer charity/Armstrong tribute event, where Lance was to be presented with an award. He showed up late, signed no autographs for any of the kids, spoke to essentially no one, and didn't say a word at the podium after being presented with his award. He just said something like, "Thank you," and left. She said everyone was completely floored.

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Old 08-01-2003, 11:49 AM   #16263
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Hey Tour Freaks

Quote:
Originally posted by purse junkie
The Tour is by far the most difficult sporting event on earth and the most demanding in terms of pure athleticism, stamina and strength. I cannot think of any other sport than remotely comes close.
Concur.
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Old 08-01-2003, 11:49 AM   #16264
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Hey Tour Freaks

Quote:
Originally posted by purse junkie
The Tour is by far the most difficult sporting event on earth and the most demanding in terms of pure athleticism, stamina and strength. I cannot think of any other sport than remotely comes close.
Seriously, I always thought it was the caber toss.
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Old 08-01-2003, 11:51 AM   #16265
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Hey Tour Freaks

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Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
What top athlete isn't a bit cocky?
Depends what you mean by "top athlete". Wayne Gretzky is pretty shy in person. Not at all cocky. I've probably met about 50 or so NHL players (not all stars, mind you) and I would only describe one or two of them as cocky. And people literally worship these guys.
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Old 08-01-2003, 11:52 AM   #16266
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Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
and you can have no athletic ability whatsoever and be a good runner...
So where the fuck's my gold medal then?
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Old 08-01-2003, 11:59 AM   #16267
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Hey Tour Freaks

Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
From EVERY single (unverified) source that I have, from people who have met him to just plain rumours, all have said that Lance is a fucking prick...
He's an incredibly obsessive athlete, so a measure of dickishness is de rigeuer. However, "a fucking prick"? I guess it depends on who is describing him.

I don't know him personally, but as an Austinite, I do know his representatives, foundation guys, and friends and I have never heard him described as any worse than any other athlete -- in fact he's far better than basketball and some pitchers who live around here.
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:01 PM   #16268
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Coltrane on Running

Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Running takes more athleticism than cycling
How?
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:04 PM   #16269
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Hey Tour Freaks

Quote:
Originally posted by purse junkie
So where the fuck's my gold medal then?

If you trained SERIOUSLY for five years, you could get really really good. I know a guy who can't dribble a basketball, throws a baseball like a girl, and trips over his own feet playing soccer.

But he runs sub-2:30 marathons.

Endurance sports are much more about hard work than god-given talent. Granted, the very best are genetically superior, but not in an athletic way. For example, Khalid Khanoucchi (world record holder in the marathon) weighs 125 lbs and has a tiny chest. However, he can expand his chest to well over 50 inches, which is completely absurd. His lung capacity is off the charts. Hence the world record.
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:11 PM   #16270
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Coltrane on Running

Quote:
Originally posted by evenodds
How?
You're not using a $5k piece of equipment to propel you. Just your own body.

Granted, neither sport is high on the "athletic" scale.


Let me say that I have the utmost respect for endurance athletes. Running is one of my passions. But I'm never going to claim that it takes too much "athleticism" to be somewhat successful. It takes hard fucking work. With this hard fucking work, almost anyone can be relatively successful. That can't be said about most skill sports. In the latter, either you have it or you don't.
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:11 PM   #16271
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My favorite reviews since Battlefield Earth

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

"'Gigli' makes 'Hudson Hawk' look like a hiccup, 'Ishtar' like a minor misstep. It’s the stuff 'Mystery Science Theater 3000s' are made of. . . . Watching him try to distract her sexually while she's reading a book is embarrassing. Think: Winnie the Pooh coming on to Catherine Zeta-Jones. . . .One recurring metaphor Gigli employs for the battle of the sexes, gay or straight, is that it all comes down to bulls (him) and cows (her). Maybe that explains why 'Gigli' is such a pile of manure."

Chicago Tribune

"Put together enough pointless, random details, and you get "Gigli," a movie that's less incompetent than bewildering. How on earth did writer-director Martin Brest ("Meet Joe Black," "Scent of a Woman") envision this movie? As "Chasing Amy" meets "Rain Man" meets "Pulp Fiction"? Did someone think that sounded like a winning combination?"

The Cincinnati Enquirer

"There are so many things wrong with Gigli that you might be surprised to hear its worst fault is sheer tedium. ... Whatever the reason, Gigli stutters and flops and flounders around in a sludge of would-be comedy, action and pathos. Tone, pacing and character devlopment are flat out inept. The mood is about as thrilling as the waiting line in an unemployment office. And the dialogue - sweet, screaming Jehosephat, it's awful. "

filmcritic.com

"Together, Affleck and Lopez have approximately six good movies to their names. Gigli isn’t one of them. Vulgar, insensitive and unaware of its direction, the split-personality character study wavers from mob drama to romantic comedy when it should’ve picked one and stuck with it."

Los Angeles Times

"So forget the hype — this movie would stink even without its big-ticket stars, which isn't to say that either is entirely blameless."

New York Times

"But Larry's name is pronounced ZHEE-lee, or as he likes to say, 'rhymes with really.' As in really, really silly, which is the kindest way to describe this hopelessly misconceived exercise in celebrity self-worship, which opens to nationwide ridicule today. . . . In one scene Ricki takes on a group of ill-mannered ruffians who are making noise at a taco stand. Larry wants to beat them up, but she takes a more refined approach, sauntering over in her short denim skirt and lecturing them on their "people skills." She also threatens the apparent ringleader with a baroque martial-arts torture, which involves gouging out the eyes and also removing that part of the brain that stores visual information, so that the victim will not only be blind, but will also lose all memory of what he has seen. Having seen "Gigli," I must say that the idea has a certain appeal."

San Francisco Chronicle

"Gigli" doesn't need a review; it needs an inquest. The movie is dead on arrival. Who or what killed it? There are multiple suspects: Was it the endless prattle? The ludicrously inappropriate soundtrack? The funereal pacing? The uneasy mix of vulgarity and cheap sentiment? The almost nonexistent story? The resounding miscasting of Ben Affleck as a tough guy and Jennifer Lopez as a woman who'd actually speak to him? Or the bad, bad, bad, bad writing? The answer: This is one of those "Murder on the Orient Express" situations, in which all the suspects are guilty. The result is the most thoroughly joyless and inept film of the year, and one of the worst of the decade."

Houston Chronicle

"To readers of People magazine and tawdrier purveyors of celebrity gossip, Gigli is known as the movie that brought Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez together as a couple. For the rest of us, that isn't much of a recommendation. Separately, Affleck and Lopez have rarely given better than passable performances. (This is especially true of Lopez, who acts about as well as she sings.) Together, they present an insurmountable challenge for a film that was saddled with a bum script from the beginning. . . . "

Salon.com

"As is often the case with movies that have poisonous advance word of mouth, "Gigli" turns out to be merely bad -- not a train wreck, not the crime against humanity it's been rumored to be."
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:12 PM   #16272
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Coltrane on Running

Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
You're not using a $5k piece of equipment to propel you. Just your own body.
This is the stupidest thing you've ever written.
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:15 PM   #16273
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Tour d Afrique

For something most of us could physically accomplish there is the Tour d Afrique to be held next year. But, $8k and at least 100 days is certainly out of the question.
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:15 PM   #16274
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Coltrane on Running

Quote:
Originally posted by evenodds
This is the stupidest thing you've ever written.
Hey, don't sell me so short. I've written some pretty stupid things.

And your bias is so blatant is disgusting. It's obvious you worship the sport of cycling and it's athletes. I have no problem with that. But, I'm trying to be a little bit more objective here.
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Last edited by Did you just call me Coltrane?; 08-01-2003 at 12:20 PM..
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Old 08-01-2003, 12:17 PM   #16275
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Coltrane on Running

Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Hey, don't sell me so short. I've written some pretty stupid things.

No shit. I was gonna say, that it is impressive that was the stupidest thing you have ever written.

You write stupid things a lot.



(Happy Friday!)


I like this Gigli review:

I ordinarily don't like to go after an easy target. It used to be a blast to mock the French, but then everyone started doing it after that country didn't back efforts to root out nonexistent weapons of mass destruction in Iraq (how could they, les bastards!). I tried applying the same logic to Gigli, at least before I saw it. Since the buzz was unbelievably bad, and the few critics who screened the film before me had such a great time bashing it with all of their might, I thought it might be fun to approach the film in a positive manner. "Even if it's bad," I reasoned, "it might be so bad it's good."

So much for my optimism. Gigli is a gargantuan piece of shit and deserves a place in the Bad Movie Hall of Shame. Put it higher than Showgirls (because that had the balls to push the nudity envelope) and the unholy trinity of Glitter, Battlefield Earth and Gods and Generals (because those were vanity projects forced through the system). Gigli, which was originally slated for release last November, is the biggest waste of talent since Full Frontal. Or maybe even Ishtar.

For the rest see http://www.rottentomatoes.com/click/...=3&rid=1180471
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