Drive fast, live hard, no regrets... Sorry Penske

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by dtb
Am I the only one who kept trying to click on "combination" to find out what to do with the gin?

Pour it on him and set him aflame. The flambe will sear the malodorous bacteria and give him a nice tan to boot.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Thats still no excuse to vomit on her during missionary.

SS has problems, but that isn't one of them. He ordered her from a website that let him personalize her, and wanting that was part of the "bio" that he created.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Oliver_Wendell_Ramone
Dude, you and your "buddies" share way to fucking much.

I clerked for the state in law school. There was a paralegal there who dealt with lots of prison issues. When an inmate acted up and got shipped off to some wherever misbehaving prisoners got sent, their stuff would be inventoried. The para kept seeing a woman's name (betty or something) on the inventories. She finally asked a guard what it meant. It was, apparently, the inmate's vaseline-filled sock. Maybe your buddy had done time.

One friend of mine kept a hammer in the freezer. He claimed that placing the cold hammer beneath his balls as he masturbated was a great feeling. I never understood that one.

[dtb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Pour it on him and set him aflame. The flambe will sear the malodorous bacteria and give him a nice tan to boot.

Is that what you did? I don't want to repeat.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
SS has problems, but that isn't one of them. He ordered her from a website that let him personalize her, and wanting that was part of the "bio" that he created.

Is that called a reverse Cleveland Steamer?

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by dtb
Is that what you did? I don't want to repeat.

No. I lost my eyebrows that way in College. I have done the “Gin Torch” since. My Italian friends tell me its an excellent way to rid yourself of back hair.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Why not just keep your work slacks out of the hamper until after the evening session?

Funny you should say that. I was at a luncheon in lime green pants last week. The waitress asked me if I was a doctor. I was baffled. In front of the whole table, she said “Those are scrubs, aren’t they?”

I tipped her in Canadian coins and subway tokens.

[dtb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
No. I lost my eyebrows that way in College. I have done the “Gin Torch” since. My Italian friends tell me its an excellent way to rid yourself of back hair.

On what other occasions have you used the Gin Torch after the unfortunate eyebrow incident?

[baltassoc]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Funny you should say that. I was at a luncheon in lime green pants last week. The waitress asked me if I was a doctor. I was baffled. In front of the whole table, she said “Those are scrubs, aren’t they?”

I tipped her in Canadian coins and subway tokens.

You got what you deserved. Lime green? That may play in Minneapolis [hi, PLF!], but Philly?

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by baltassoc
You got what you deserved. Lime green? That may play in Minneapolis [hi, PLF!], but Philly?

Aren't those the Eagles colors?

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Not Bob

Speaking of, he has to be one of ESPN's most prized assets. One of the best. I could watch him, Gammons and Bob Ley over and over again. What happened to Dan Patrick? Banished to radio?

TM

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by dtb
On what other occasions have you used the Gin Torch after the unfortunate eyebrow incident?

None. I’d sooner ingest paint thinner than gin. I won’t get withing sniffing distance of gin, eggplant, kiwi fruit or menthol cigarettes. I have this strong aversion to certain substances. Perhaps an allergy to juniper berries used in Gin. Who knows? Probably genetic. My father can’t tolerate gin either. I grew up believing until I was 15 or so that a true martini was a vodka drink.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by dtb
Ha! I wish I'd had a sweater tied around my neck. It is freakin' freezing indoors! When I bought my snazzy new jeans, I had to wear a sweater while waiting for the fitting person, because I was so damned cold. The saleslady tried to get me to buy it, but I told her I was wearing only so I wouldn't freeze to death. She was disappointed, but she understood. At least she did when she lowered the hood of her parka and I didn't have to communicate with sign language.

Those salesladies have so many different words for "sweater."

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
None. I’d sooner ingest paint thinner than gin. I won’t get withing sniffing distance of gin, eggplant, kiwi fruit or menthol cigarettes.

Grilled eggplant? Good stuff.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by baltassoc
You got what you deserved. Lime green? That may play in Minneapolis [hi, PLF!], but Philly?

True. This town dresses in the dark.

Pleated dockers and Lands End button downs. Hot... if you’re looking to score at a postal worker’s convention. But I guess its better than when people here actually try to look stylish. There’s something really nauseating about 50ish yentas and “Denises” dressing like Britney. And the massive sets of double D fake tits and bad facelifts are a crime against humanity.