Fashion Board 5-7-04 to 6-9-04

[AnotherSarcasticSock]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I have decided to replace Bruce Springsteen with Katie Couric as number one on my list of "History's Greatest Monsters." If I have to hear about colonoscopies or post-partum disorder from her one more time, I'm going to catch a train to the City and stand behind the glass with a sign that says "Katie whips her children with extension cords".

You don't have to hear from Katie. Just change out of your nightgown into your clothes a little earlier and go to work. I wasn't aware that there were any men who watch that morning pablum crap which is designed for housewives and old people.

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
Please remove the buttplug before going to work. it makes you cranky.

My bad, Alex.

[Alex_de_Large]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
My bad, Alex.

No problem, Paigow. I am just looking out for you.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by purse junkie


Very few men can wear a sports jacket without looking like someone's awkward football coach forced by his wife to dress up for once, or a country club khaki gin-and-tonic drone. But done right, they are very sexy.

I see people getting away with wearing a sport coat all the time. It looks fine on most.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I don't know. He is infinitely less funny than Horatio Sanz. He's based out of Chicago and I DON'T KNOW A SINGLE PERSON WHO LISTENS TO HIM. Not one. If people want shock jockage, they turn to Stern.

I listen to ESPN's Mike and Mike in the morning.

Actually, WGN TV's morning news can be hilarious at times.

If that Mankow idiot can have a morning program, so can I. My talents are going to waste here. In fact, so are the talents of everyone on this board. Just about any one of us could spew funnier shit than Mankow off the top of our heads, cold. I'm not even sure the man tells jokes or offers anecdotes. All I hear is a lot of heated yelling, like somebody who's just just had a pile of blow for the first time. Its non-sequitur gibberish, and then the Fox talking heads laugh and nod in agreement as though they were listening to Gore Vidal and George Carlin trade quips.

I think I understand - Mankow is Sean Hannity's step-brother who has a Red Bull problem.

As to why I watch Today, I turn it on because it has the local weather. I want to know whether I'll need to carry a parisole to the office.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Jack,

Pleated pants are NOT coming back for anyone under 70. Pleated pants or shorts are just shy of being as verboten as jeans shorts, or "jorts" as they're called here in pennsylvania, where colorful locals still wear them.

Pleated pants are ONLY acceptable with suits, and really only because many traditional suitmakers do not offer non-pleated versions. Many portly store clerks who like pleated pants will tell you they are more traditional" or more formal. Those Costanzas are wrong; non-pleated pants are in fact the more classic look. By way of conspicuous example, Sean Connery did not wear pleated pants in Dr. No, nor did JFK. Pleated pants are an invention of the 80s, and geared toward buyers who think they're "slimming." In fact, they actually make people look fatter than they are. For those of us without below-the-belt-stomachs, they leave a strange pouch of fabric which does not go away, no matter how much you have the pants tapered.

When buying pants, consider how pleated pants look on women. You will not see a young, with-it woman wearing pleated pants, because they'll make her look like a marsupial. You'll only see women who've let themselves go to pot wearin "mom pants." This should be an indicator to you to avoid pleated pants.

Hope it helps,
SD

I still have some pleated business casual pants, and they don't look terrible. Granted, flat-front pants look better and always will, but you must have owned some grandpa-pleated pants that truly poofed out at the waist, b/c they all don't do that.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
If that Mankow idiot can have a morning program, so can I. My talents are going to waste here. In fact, so are the talents of everyone on this board. Just about any one of us could spew funnier shit than Mankow off the top of our heads, cold. I'm not even sure the man tells jokes or offers anecdotes. All I hear is a lot of heated yelling, like somebody who's just just had a pile of blow for the first time. Its non-sequitur gibberish, and then the Fox talking heads laugh and nod in agreement as though they were listening to Gore Vidal and George Carlin trade quips.

I think I understand - Mankow is Sean Hannity's step-brother who has a Red Bull problem.

As to why I watch Today, I turn it on because it has the local weather. I want to know whether I'll need to carry a parisole to the office.

I've always been pretty "meh" when it comes to Stern. He can be funny at times, but he's usually just painfully repetitive. Mankow is a louder, dumber and much less funny version of Stern, and he lacks that humility that Stern sometimes displays.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I see people getting away with wearing a sport coat all the time. It looks fine on most.

Fuck the sport coat. Wear a suit or go casual.

I had to wear a sport coat in a wedding a few months ago. Annoying as hell. I dusted off one of the five or so beer and ketchup stained (See: Fraternity Formals) blue blazers I've accumulated over the years, had it cleaned and wore the "Cape Cod" outfit (white point collar, khaki pleated pants and some silly patterned hermes tie). I never felt so uncomfortable. I felt like an Angus Young impersonator. I can't imagine dressing like that for work. You look half dressed. And I don't buy anything khaki anymore. I've worn enough khaki pants for four lifetimes.

Gimme surf shorts and t-shirts and flip flops (summer) or jeans and whetever or cotton pants and a shirt (winter/fall) or a suit, but fuck the "sportcoat look". Its a goddamned abomination.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
Which is probably why SNL is bypassing the inevitable "Best of Horatio Sanz" DVD and going directly to "Best of Christopher Walken" this Saturday.

Holy crap. I need to break out my cowbell and crack open a bottle of fine champanya for this occasion.

TM

PS - I will never know how to spell occasion. That never looks right to me. But neither does "occassion" and "ocassion." It's a fucked up word.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I still have some pleated business casual pants, and they don't look terrible. Granted, flat-front pants look better and always will, but you must have owned some grandpa-pleated pants that truly poofed out at the waist, b/c they all don't do that.

Mostly agree with Coltrane. I own pleated pants. I am 6'4" and around 190. I am pretty sure I do not look fat wearing them. In fact, I am wearing pleated pants today. I do not even think that flat front pants always look better. Dissenting from PJ, I am also wearing a sport jacket today. I am hoping I do not look like someone forced me to wear it to dress up for my kid's piano recital, or whatever. I suppose, if I had the cojones, I would post a pic of my current outfit and let the FB stand in judgment.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I've always been pretty "meh" when it comes to Stern. He can be funny at times, but he's usually just painfully repetitive. Mankow is a louder, dumber and much less funny version of Stern, and he lacks that humility that Stern sometimes displays.

I'll paraphrase Lewis Black's musing about why Leni Reifenstahl lived to 900 while John Ritter died young - "Why, God, does the Nazi make the century mark, but you take mensch like John Ritter in his fifties?"

I think that applies to a world where Mankow gets a morning television spot. There is a cosmic imbalance in the world favoring the lowest common denominator. I'm no Howard nut, but Mankow isn't worthy to wash Howard's jockstrap. And it ain't about humility. Howard's just funnier, but that ain't hard, since Mankow appears to exist in a humor-free vacuum.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I am pretty sure I do not look fat wearing them.

Actually, that's why we are snickering at you, Plumpy O'Beserson.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
I am hoping I do not look like someone forced me to wear it to dress up for my kid's piano recital, or whatever. I suppose, if I had the cojones, I would post a pic of my current outfit and let the FB stand in judgment.

I have no doubt that you look just lovely.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Gas them: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...nwanted_guests
(Spree: Woman Tries to Gas Unwanted Houseguests)

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Mostly agree with Coltrane. I own pleated pants. I am 6'4" and around 190. I am pretty sure I do not look fat wearing them. In fact, I am wearing pleated pants today. I do not even think that flat front pants always look better. Dissenting from PJ, I am also wearing a sport jacket today. I am hoping I do not look like someone forced me to wear it to dress up for my kid's piano recital, or whatever. I suppose, if I had the cojones, I would post a pic of my current outfit and let the FB stand in judgment.

Pleated pants made with really good fabric (suits, expensive pants) will drape nicely, but pleated Dockers/Gap khakis type pleated pants will balloon.

My favorite is pleated jean shorts on women with double asses (one in front, one in back). Its just so fucking wrong.

Is there a shortage of mirrors in society?