Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03 - Page 1169

Aloha Mr. Learned Hand · 08-07-2003, 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore

speaking of porn cliches, I've yet to meet a woman who owned up to wanting to do a DP

Looks like the guy who won the BassMasters Classic last week has met his match. Nice angling, Slave.

SlaveNoMore · 08-07-2003, 05:36 PM

Quote:

paigowprincess
*Getting on the assterick bandwagon. I assume that a woman eating Slave's ass out would not face a nasty sweaty hairy ass but would have a serious case of razor burn.

What do you mean assume?

This sounds like one of those "I have this friend who..."

not7ySmooth

sebastian_dangerfield · 08-07-2003, 05:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Why is it uncomfortalbe/ Does she have scales on her tongue or are you just empathetic to how gross it must be to stick one's tongue into the nasty sweaty hairy ass of a man?*

*Getting on the assterick bandwagon. I assume that a woman eating Slave's ass out would not face a nasty sweaty hairy ass but would have a serious case of razor burn.

Why is it not uncomfortable?

You're out drinking in a sweaty bar and you come home and start messing around with a girl and you're fucking for a while and switching positions back and forth and suddenly she goes from being on top to spreading your legs like you're in stirrups and eating out your ass. "Hey baby... gimme a little hint before you go for that kind of action...." The first thoughts that come to mind are "Fuck, I hope I didn't take a beer shit at that last bar?" Then you start thinking "Fuck... this chicks is eye to eye with my asshole - I've tried to look at my asshole in a mirrior before and didn't like what I saw... What the hell must she be thinking?" And finally... "NOTE TO SELF - DO NOT KISS THIS CHICK."

Yeh, its fucking really uncomfortable. I don't have to do the gyno visit once a year. I ain't used to stirrups...

S(and no, I did not repay the favor - she can eat her own starfish out if she likes)D

08-07-2003, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Why is it not uncomfortable?

You're out drinking in a sweaty bar and you come home and start messing around with a girl and you're fucking for a while and switching positions back and forth and suddenly she goes from being on top to spreading your legs like you're in stirrups and eating out your ass. "Hey baby... gimme a little hint before you go for that kind of action...." The first thoughts that come to mind are "Fuck, I hope I didn't take a beer shit at that last bar?" Then you start thinking "Fuck... this chicks is eye to eye with my asshole - I've tried to look at my asshole in a mirrior before and didn't like what I saw... What the hell must she be thinking?" And finally... "NOTE TO SELF - DO NOT KISS THIS CHICK."

Yeh, its fucking really uncomfortable. I don't have to do the gyno visit once a year. I ain't used to stirrups...

S(and no, I did not repay the favor - she can eat her own starfish out if she likes)D

This would be a great stand up bit for Palphie May. You should write comedy bc I am still LOLing. Leagl, can we start a greatest hits library and put this one in there?

ThrashersFan · 08-07-2003, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I had a first date with a hot tex ask me if he could go down on me. I thought that was inappropriate first date behavior, certinaly not for a classy lady like me, so I just fucked him.

This only serves to increase my internet-based respect for you. Any gal is remiss to equate semi-anonymous sex with reason to forget her classy upbringing.

Shape Shifter · 08-07-2003, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Would such gaping not cause problems? This aspect now makes it seem like a very, very bad idea.

Like other body parts, it can expand and contract. Another poster alluded earlier to transition/preparation time. This segment is often neglected in porn, which is probably where Kobe went wrong.

Relax.

leagleaze · 08-07-2003, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
I did not get to eat the cake at my first wedding because I stopped at a bar for shots of Goldschlager (ugh) on the way from the ceremony to the reception and then drank a bottle of tequila with the only person at the reception that I liked (a college friend who also had shown up late to my shower with a gift of crotchless panties and a peek-a-boo bra which almost gave my soon to be mother-in-law (fucking cunt) a heart attack). For my second marriage we went down to the courthouse one day and got married by a judge -- no cake but I had to go back to work anyway. I did not eat cake at my sister's wedding because I was outside getting into a "shoving match that almost turned into a fistfight" with some piece of shit kid who I once babysat for -- luckily I had chosen my own maid of honor dress which permitted such activities. I hate weddings so I normally just send a check.

When I have a wedding, do me a favor, just send a check...thanks.

The rest of you are welcome to attend though.

And sure paigow, we can have a library, as long as you run it.

ThrashersFan · 08-07-2003, 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Why is [having your bummy tongued] not uncomfortable?
[Detailed explanation]

I would not ever have been able to innocently explain why I was laughing like that had anyone walked into my office. Thank you for the best laugh I have had all week.

ltl/fb · 08-07-2003, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Like other body parts, it can expand and contract. Another poster alluded earlier to transition/preparation time. This segment is often neglected in porn, which is probably where Kobe went wrong.

Relax.

funny (on the relax).

If there is a lot of preparation (including time) involved in the expansion, how quickly after removal does one return to completely contracted? If eye dilation at the eye doctor is any guide, I would not want my anus gaping that long.

Bad_Rich_Chic · 08-07-2003, 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I was addressing your joke in conjunction with your earlier PC rant about. I assumed the joke was an extension of your earlier argument.

TM

Can't a girl get off a nice crack at the expense of PCers, anti-PCer straw-men, and Bilmore all at the same time around here anymore?

You never used to take me seriously ... methinks you may need a good taunting.

SlaveNoMore · 08-07-2003, 06:00 PM

Quote:

leagleaze
When I have a wedding...

You moving to Canada soon or you have some political insight we aren't privvy to.

not7yS

ThrashersFan · 08-07-2003, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
funny (on the relax).

If there is a lot of preparation (including time) involved in the expansion, how quickly after removal does one return to completely contracted? If eye dilation at the eye doctor is any guide, I would not want my anus gaping that long.

So would it go something like this?

"Well, I gotta skee-daddle. Yeah, um, I would love to spend the night after that great sex but I can't sleep when I am being watched. Oh, sure, I know that your eyes are closed."

leagleaze · 08-07-2003, 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
You moving to Canada soon or you have some political insight we aren't privvy to.

not7yS

Guess what we still call them weddings. And when I marry I'll be a wife, and she'll be a wife. And we'll be married. It is besides the point whether the state recognizes it.

robustpuppy · 08-07-2003, 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
nice crack

Intentional?

str8outavannuys · 08-07-2003, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by blueballs
Hey punk from nowhere, when did it stop being funny is the real question? The answer is never! Vive le revoluccion!

I've never understood why people care where other people's coffee (or t-shirt, or CD) buying dollars go: to some local rich guy, or some corporation? You spend your money how you want, let everyone else spend their money however they want. Anything else smacks of paternalism.

str(ok anti-globalization folks, let me have it)8