Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
It's all Greek to me.

Too bad we don't have audio effects, Shecky -- this joke calls for, dare I say it, a rim shot.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by Seven of Nine

(Various items found in people's bums)

But my favorite had to be an entire jar of Peanut Butter! I kid you not. Although the X-ray was downright hilarious (and seemingly anatomically impossible) the story was better. If I remember correctly, when the guy was interviewed by the attending physician, he claimed that he was snacking on some peanut butter as he stepped, naked, into the shower. He then finished snacking and put the jar on the floor. Thereafter, he turned around and, slipping on a bar of soap, landed ass-first on the jar which -- POOF -- popped right into his ass! I have never laughed so hard in all my life...

Talk about your gaping holes...

Was it smooth or crunchy?

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Whoa there. You're getting married on a holiday weekend? I know it's not Labor Day, but still, what a controversial move! Now you've really given us something to talk about!!

Is Columbus day a holiday anywhere west of DC?

[idle acts]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
I have been told by GFs that spending the night partying with strippers creates a presumption - rebuttable, of course - that you had sex with the stripper(s). I am not sure what the standard of proof is to rebut the presumption, but I have never met it.

Depends how much glitter you are wearing ( and where) upon your return home. Oh, and how much "stripper scented perfume" rubbed off on you. (Why must they all wear that perfume?)

A day of talk of assplay including rimming, yet the King himself isn't in the building.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Too bad we don't have audio effects, Shecky -- this joke calls for, dare I say it, a rim shot.

LOL!

(I'm not proud)

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
funny (on the relax).

If there is a lot of preparation (including time) involved in the expansion, how quickly after removal does one return to completely contracted? If eye dilation at the eye doctor is any guide, I would not want my anus gaping that long.

I think that preparation depends on the particular slot, as do gaping and contraction. From my experience (and I appreciate in advance that this is going to elicit small penis cracks from the peanut gallery, and especially you), gaping doesn't happen if you're having normal anal sex, instead of the brutal force and depth you see in a lot of porn. What's more, I don't think everyone gapes, even if done that roughly. I think the women who do it in porn might be, for lack of a better term, gaping specialists.

Most of preparation is lubrication and using not much force or depth in the beginning.

[Seven of Nine]

Originally posted by Anne Elk
Was it smooth or crunchy?

Extra crunchy. Definately.
Come to think of it, em's bum looked a little like this:
:eek2:

[LessinSF]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
this joke calls for, dare I say it, a rim shot.

Take a seat.

Less (Tooling for anus… THAT'S YOU!
Tooling for anus… HIM TOO!
Tooling for anus… HER TOO!
Tooling for anus… THEM TOO!)inSF

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Is Columbus day a holiday anywhere west of DC?

I was mocking the notion that one's wedding date could be controversial. Note the overuse of exclamation points.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by Seven of Nine


But my favorite had to be an entire jar of Peanut Butter! I kid you not. Although the X-ray was downright hilarious (and seemingly anatomically impossible) the story was better. If I remember correctly, when the guy was interviewed by the attending physician, he claimed that he was snacking on some peanut butter as he stepped, naked, into the shower. He then finished snacking and put the jar on the floor. Thereafter, he turned around and, slipping on a bar of soap, landed ass-first on the jar which -- POOF -- popped right into his ass! I have never laughed so hard in all my life...

Talk about your gaping holes...

AWFUL PUN WARNING

Doctor: Is that reeeallly what happened?

Patient: Damn Skippy.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by mmm3587
I think that preparation depends on the particular slot, as do gaping and contraction. From my experience (and I appreciate in advance that this is going to elicit small penis cracks from the peanut gallery, and especially you), gaping doesn't happen if you're having normal anal sex, instead of the brutal force and depth you see in a lot of porn. What's more, I don't think everyone gapes, even if done that roughly. I think the women who do it in porn might be, for lack of a better term, gaping specialists.

Most of preparation is lubrication and using not much force or depth in the beginning.

And remember never to have any slot C action with a girl who's eaten corn within 24 hours...

S(the kernels fall all over the carpet before you can run from the bedroom to the shower)D

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
And remember never to have any slot C action with a girl who's eaten corn within 24 hours...

S(the kernels fall all over the carpet before you can run from the bedroom to the shower)D

Didn't she wash the corn? I'm assuming it was corn on the cob.

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
And remember never to have any slot C action with a girl who's eaten corn within 24 hours...

S(the kernels fall all over the carpet before you can run from the bedroom to the shower)D

That's disgusting! Why would anyone in their right mind knowingly ingest corn?

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
And remember never to have any slot C action with a girl who's eaten corn within 24 hours...

S(the kernels fall all over the carpet before you can run from the bedroom to the shower)D

Ew - corn on the knob.