Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[SlaveNoMore]

1) If you go to the airport, carry over $100 on you lest the FUCKING POWER GRID goes out and you have no money:

2) See 1, repeat;

3) Call local hotels immediately, even if they don't cancel flight, so you don't end up sleeping on either (a) floor of conference room of (b) cot for $50 with shared group of wierdos;

4) Do not trust Airline 1-800 numbers to do jack shit in a crisis, as they will (a) tell you to go to airport for flight in one hour and (b) arrive at airport and be told (i) all flights are still cancelled and (ii) call said 1-800 number for info. [Telling clerk that said number is giving contradictory information, following argument, and the predictable "you are a fucking asshole" proves not productive];

5) Cops will still bust your stones, even in blackout, for no reason - fuck em';

6) Don't go up 29 flights of stairs with a waxy candle.

not7y(battered, broken, and missed his beach vacay dammit)S

Originally posted by NotFromHere
I'll preface this by saying I've never been to Texas, but I was told by a person who travelled to the Houston area that they paint the tunnels green to simulate plant-life. Is that part of the recreation effort of which you speak?

Sorry to dredge up Friday, but Houston is less than 30' above sea level, has a subsidence problem, and floods not uncommonly. Even if tunnels were part of our highway system, one would need to take out extra life insurance to drive through them.

-TL

[evenodds]

I care.

That sucks, big time.

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by evenodds
I care.

That sucks, big time.

Yes, it does. And I too care.

Poor Slave

[Jack Manfred]

First, I decree that all of the "gay men are influencing straight men" articles have reached their apex (and thus begin their precipitous downfall/backlash) with the inexplicably rave reviews for Junior Senior's D-D-Don't Stop The Beat, a Danish outfit featuring a young, handsome straight guy and an older, flabby gay man. I had hear the rave reviews declare it "A most pleasurable guilty pleasure," so when I went to Tower Records this weekend, I listened to it. It's just crap. Just because a gay man is involved in the production of something, doesn't mean it's good. See Elton John's output for the past twenty years. (Although I do wonder if the gay angle influenced the Village Voice critic to write "It's like each song on the album has the dynamics and reach of a DJ set, ramming David Bowie and Fats Domino into K.C. and the Sunshine Band.")

Second, if you want to buy a Cowboy Junkies album made by a band that is not the Cowboy Junkiies, then you want to buy Rabbit Songs by Hem. I remember hearing the song "When I Was Drinking" a good year and a half ago on KCRW, but Dreamworks picked up the band, re-released the album, and put it into Tower Records stores so people could actually buy the record. By the way, Hem is not to be confused with either the band Hum or the band Venus Hum. Perhaps we're running out of band names.

Third, has anyone else seen the new commercial for the Hummer H2? The Who's "Happy Jack" plays while a boy drives a soapbox H2 down a mountain race. It's a clever commerical, but I don't want anyone else on the road with a Hummer. I'm conflicted.

[Replaced_Texan]

Obscene Interiors
(spree: (from the site) Amateur porn photography is one of the rare instances where everyday people expose their naked bodies to the public. Seeing your neighbors nude my be shocking, I, however, am more frequently disturbed by the gross display of amateur interior design found in these photos.

"Oh my God! How could they do that? Those curtains are so wrong, I can't believe this stuff is allowed on the net." It can be pretty hardcore. I've gathered a random selection of male amateur porn and personal ad photographs and asked professional designers to join me in a lively critique of these truly obscene Interiors. (No need to shield your virginal eyes, the nude figures have been laboriously obscured.) )

[evenodds]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Obscene Interiors
(spree: (from the site) Amateur porn photography is one of the rare instances where everyday people expose their naked bodies to the public. Seeing your neighbors nude my be shocking, I, however, am more frequently disturbed by the gross display of amateur interior design found in these photos.

"Oh my God! How could they do that? Those curtains are so wrong, I can't believe this stuff is allowed on the net." It can be pretty hardcore. I've gathered a random selection of male amateur porn and personal ad photographs and asked professional designers to join me in a lively critique of these truly obscene Interiors. (No need to shield your virginal eyes, the nude figures have been laboriously obscured.) )

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

That website reminds me of brunch with my parents when they would discuss deconstruct the host's rooms the morning after a party.

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Thought y'all might find this amusing, or not:

"Dear Miss Manners:

I've been married to my lovely wife for eight years. We have always celebrated our anniversary in grand style. I have commemorated significant years with jewels and always with a romantic dinner.

We are both working professionals, and I was wondering if it is appropriate for me to receive anything in return (non-physical).

Did you really have to add that at the end?

Miss Manners was about to give you a stirring yet touching speech about reciprocity in marriage, in the hope of persuading your wife to see if the jeweler also carries cuff links. But after you mentioned the notion of physical acts as reciprocation for jewels, she was no longer in the mood. "

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...2003Aug16.html (free registry)

Also, anyone else find the SATC pretty amusing last night? I did on two levels - 1, anything about shoes and shoe-related revenge is interesting, and 2, I realized why I like the Charlotte/Harry story line so much: it reminds me of me and the Mr. Except I'm Harry.

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by evenodds
Thank you, thank you, thank you.

That website reminds me of brunch with my parents when they would discuss deconstruct the host's rooms the morning after a party.

"Something wicker this way comes."

That is a classic line. And also, more proof, just because they are gay (if they are gay) it doesn't mean they have an iota of taste.

Speaking of nightmares, and here's a good poll(pole) for the day. What is the absolute worst thing you have seen in a house/apartment in the way of decoration? It can be a residence into which you moved or just something you saw.

When I was in 4th grade my folks bought a 200 year old house which had been left by the owners for about 9 months. They left everything in it, including food.

The neighborhood kids used it for trysts and drugs. It was a wreck. That is not the worst thing I have ever seen.

The worst thing was in the next house we purchased, in 86 or so. This house, which was owned by two gay men, was the biggest mess I have ever seen in my life. It was worse than the house that had been left empty and used for drugs and sex by teenagers. And, the worst thing about it? They took soup can and alcohol bottle labels, glued them to the kitchen wall, and just to make sure it was protected, put a coat of varnish over those suckers.

I will never forget scraping those things off.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by leagleaze
Speaking of nightmares, and here's a good poll(pole) for the day. What is the absolute worst thing you have seen in a house/apartment in the way of decoration? It can be a residence into which you moved or just something you saw.

Not absolutely shocking like your stories, but when I was househunting a few years ago (mid 90s), I looked at a townhouse that had a purple living room, with parquet wood floor, a disco ball and a mirror mounted to the wall over the fireplace. Now maybe this look all worked with the decor when there was furniture in the place (doubt it), but it was tacky (not in a good way) when devoid of furnishings.

Maybe Prince lived there?

[notcasesensitive]

from reality blurred -

Wondering how much a Queer Eye for the Straight Guy makeover costs? Not as much as it appears, according to Time magazine, which reports that "[s]tores pay nothing for being featured on the show; they simply agree to let cameras in and provide merchandise for free." Stores are selling a lot of the products featured on the Bravo show, and housewares store Domain is even renaming a sofa after Fab Five member Thom Filicia called it a "chofa" on the show. A producer for the show says they won't charge companies for the air time: "They're giving me a location, and they're giving us product. Why would I charge them? That would be horrible."


Product placement, I'm sure, is another matter...

[Gattigap]

A 52 Year-old Retired Ann Arbor City Employee Invents Revolutionary New Condom. Look out, girls.

From the article (Ann Arbor News): ""I was thinking, 'The only way to make something that won't come off is to tie it on, and then it just popped in my mind - go around the testicles," McCoy said.

"If you think about who really controls sex, it's women," McCoy said. "And every woman I've showed this to has said once this is out they'll never let a man touch them with the old kind. This absolutely will not come off until you take it off... There's absolutely nothing getting out of that baby, and absolutely nothing getting in."

Gatti(No images accompanying the article. All things said, probably for the best)gap

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

For those of you who also love the strange literature of the 419 scam, attached is a correspondence between one such scammer and Mr. Randolph Carter, the well known anthropologist with Miskatonic University in Arkham MA.

If you know what that means, you will find this correspondence very, very amusing indeed. There is also some correspondence with Dr. Herbert West.

http://www.geocities.com/steerp1ke/David_Ehi.html

[ThrashersFan]

I finally rented it this weekend and was pleasantly surprised. I laughed my ass off as did my husband who had to be forgiven for forgetting two-thirds of his curling lessons from the Olympics. Anyway, there is a lot of funny shit, a few great back stories and some pretty decent curling footage. Two thumbs up -- even if you are not a curling fanatic. :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

Gwinky????

[bilmore]

You knew it was coming.

An excerpt:

"HOME DECOR.
The basics: Don't buy so much breakable crap. If it's delicate, it's a threat. Straight guys like stuff that can take an errant basketball and all you have to do is pick it up and put it back. Extra points if it's stain resistant. Or just colored so you can't tell.

Other than that, forget all the stereotypes you have heard about straight guys' decor. It does not consist of poker-playing dogs, neon bar signs and girly pictures. The truth is, the typical straight guys' home decor is no decor at all. Why put stuff on the walls you can't just paint over when spills and sprays get too thick? And if you put something on a wall, it's like an admission of defeat that you will never put a home theater there. Straight guys decorate with electronics.

So keep it simple. You don't have to dust walls.

Hot tip. Track lighting looks really cool. You guys ought to try it. "


http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...postid=3710523