Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
Here we go again folks. Yesterday I walked into the breakroom and there sits the catalog with obligatory note "help me raise funds for my school and win the 'limo to lunch' prize." School started last Monday for fuck's sake. Then I go home only to discover that my son had been tapped by the "crappy Christmas wrap" fairie. He is only 5 years old. What the fuck.

Preach it. Our neighborhood is swarming with junior high and H.S. kids who are paying for school trips and summer basketball camps by selling magazine and newspaper subscriptions door to door. It's practically slave labor for the companies selling this shit, and you're guilted into an essentially consumer transaction where the "product" is irrelevant. I don't want the fucking local paper because it fucking sucks. Why are you making me say this to a 13 year old black kid, instead of your marketing department? Oh, right, because there's a chance I'll say yes even though I don't want your fucking paper, and it's no skin off your nose because the kid only gets paid a small fraction of his sales. Why is this legal, again?

I volunteered for Christmas in April a couple of years ago, in the hopes that I could help a less advantaged person. Instead, we would up painting a public school. What the fuck are we doing in this country, that charities are performing routine maintenance on our public schools? I stayed all day and got a sunburn for it, but I was seething. Our public education system is subsidized by lotteries and bake sales. No wonder we're a fucking joke.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
Long story short, I ripped the catalog from his hands, quickly scanned the instructions for what I was looking for and wrote the $40 blackmail check that allows you to "opt out" and still meet your "voluntary commitment." Fuckers.

At least your kid is selling something tangible. My catholic elementary / middle school used to force us to sell a shitload of raffle tickets for the annual bazzar. Never, not once, after my mom bought whatever our quota was so we didn't have to bug anyone about it, did she win anything. The parish was able to rebuild the whole school off of the income of those bazzars.

There's been a "help raise money for my kid's cheerleading squad" form in the kitchen for a few days now. Fortunately, no one has signed up.

Most of the girl scout troops I know wised up, bought the cookies themselves and sold them outside of grocery stores. Much much easier way to make money than hitting up their parents' friends and colleagues.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by taxwonk
Like I'm going to take style advice from a fucking moose.

HEY, at least I'm a fucking moose with good hair, baldy.

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
(please review numerous ranting posts about the sale of girl scout cookies in my office). ... Fuckers.

While I agree with your sentiments in general, I must object that I cannot get girl scout cookies even IN the office, and the girls in green don't seem to make the rounds in my neighborhood (probaby because their parents are the only ones buying). As a rabid adict of Samoas, this is a real problem.

I would encourage anyone who has a kid who wants to sell girl scout cookies to post a notice prominently in your workplace as to their availability. If I don't find out, I can't order the 200 boxes required to tide me over until next year.

BR(but if you come by my office in person all sad-eyed asking me to enter your church raffle or sponsor your kid in a walk-a-thon, I will slap you)C

[MisterEbola]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan


Most of the girl scout troops I know wised up, bought the cookies themselves and sold them outside of grocery stores. Much much easier way to make money than hitting up their parents friends and colleagues.

I can actually deal with the girl scout cookies. Buy about 4 boxes of em a year. The spouse and I eat a box. Give one box worth away after placing it on the secretary's alcove.

The other two go into the freezer (at the office) for those all-nighters when I'm so pissed off and sucrose deprived that I'll eat about 1/2 a sleeve at once.

[W.W.L.D.]

Fresh out of the beast belly, Russell Jones (aka Dirt McGirt, fka Wu-Tang alumni Ol' Dirty Bastard) is ruling the clubs once again. With his familiar production team, The Neptunes (little known fact: they produced half of his 1999 sophomore album, Nigga Please, before anyone had heard of them), Dirty rides a hard, bouncy beat consisting of his own voice, trademark 'Tunes beats, a synthetic guitar loop, and during the chorus, bells and police sirens that ultimately wind up sounding like the soundtrack for a cartoon chase scene.

People don't really consider Dirty a lyrical monster but he surprises here with stuff like, "I was checking out My Melody before The Blueprint," and, "Twisting up the haze, black/ In back wood, I'm that good at rap when I stay strapped." As the final arrow in the heart of commercial hip-hop, the chorus contains Pharrell's falsetto singing, "Pop shit, bitch, what's up?/ Pop shit, Nigga, what's up?" It'll be in your head after two listens. This song looks to be the surprise hit off the new Neptunes compilation Clones, and the aural phoenix McGirt has been waiting for.

"beast belly?"

I only donate $ and time to left-wing extremists and my local indy radio station.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Well, based on my non-scientific sampling of your collective posts and some random e-mails I have lying around:

ncs: goes both ways

Oohh, I go both ways?!? I'm pretty excited to learn that info. Thanks!

PS. Leagl PM me please.

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
(please review numerous ranting posts about the sale of girl scout cookies in my office

Thou Shalt Not Slag Girl Scout Cookies. I don't give a crap that it's clearly parental extortion of vulnerable co-workers and death-inducing artificial crap that could clog the arteries of a rhino in one bite. Have you never had a Samoa?

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
Our public education system is subsidized by lotteries and bake sales. No wonder we're a fucking joke.

Go easy on the lotteries and bake sales; you're forgetting coke or pepsi, and their exclusive distribution agreements with schools.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Go easy on the lotteries and bake sales; you're forgetting coke or pepsi, and their exclusive distribution agreements with schools.

Isn't there advertising on the walls of schools and also piped in via TV during homeroom? Or was this a short-lived thing that lasted not long after I finished high school?

Edited to add, I think that Coke and Pepsi are "traditional family values" and may somehow be involved with abstinence. So how dare you protest their roles in the education of our children? What kind of communist are you????

[ABBAKiss]

Stupid and Irritating Fund Raisers

When we were younger we would always go through whatever fundraising FREE CAR WASH!!!! was around and take them at their word.

ABBA(Girl Scout who never sold cookies)Kiss

[bilmore]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
When I put one of my posts about transmissions in, it thinks I'm male. When I put in my post about second-time bridal showers, it thinks I'm female.

So, this test mirrors . . . . me?

(You DO know lots of things that I would never expect to hear about from Sven the Gargantuan down at the club, or from Dog Pisser, my tattoo'ed 'n burly biker car mechanic.)

[c2ed]

Originally posted by ltl/fb Edited to add, I think that Coke and Pepsi are "traditional family values" and may somehow be involved with abstinence. So how dare you protest their roles in the education of our children? What kind of communist are you????

You may soon hear this debate in a state near you. California (where all dubious trends start) is laying down the law, and banning soda in elementary and middle schools:

(08-22) 02:37 PDT SACRAMENTO (AP) --

Worrying about the health of California children, the state Assembly voted to ban soda sales to elementary school students and restrict sales of the drinks at junior high schools.

If passed by the Senate and signed by the governor, the bill would make California the first state to adopt a soda ban, said Harold Goldstein, executive director of the California Center for Public Health Advocacy, a nonprofit organization that supports the bill.

The bill by Democratic state Sen. Deborah Ortiz would allow elementary schools to serve students only milk, water and juice drinks that are at least half fruit and have no added sweeteners. Junior highs and middle schools could offer those beverages and electrolyte-replacing sports drinks during school hours.

C(less caffeine and sugar, more ritalin?)deuced

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by W.W.L.D.
"beast belly?"

I'm guessing either rehab, or more likely, as coined by the movie Office Space, Federal "Pound [Him] in the Ass" prison...

[bilmore]

Originally posted by c2ed
You may soon hear this debate in a state near you. California (where all dubious trends start) is laying down the law, and banning soda in elementary and middle schools:

I understand that a recently-added amendment bans red juice drinks, and subsidizes blue drinks.

(Sheesh. They can't sell plain old corn-syrup-in-a-can, yet they can cram the kids full of carbs and sugars in their school lunch and launch them well on their way to FatAmerica. Makes sense to me. I mean, to the extent simplistic jingoism CAN make sense.)