General discussion - Mom and Dad Esq.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
I worked on a case in which four or five children burned to death because the bars on the windows couldn't be opened. She couldn't reach their room through the fire, and they couldn't get out the window. (This isn't the East Palo Alto fire that AG referenced; this was in Oakland.)

So, bars that won't open seem to me to be incredibly dangerous.

"Four or five"?!?! Sounds like you needed some interrogatories, bro.

[viet_mom]

Originally posted by Trepidation_Mom
So, what's the take on window guards for apartments? In NYC, you're required to have them permanently fixed on all windows of apartments with little kids (other than windows opening onto a fire escape). NYC law requires that all "child guards" must be permanently fixed to the window frame and unopenable. (Brilliant!)
Opinions?

I moved into a house where the windows on the second floor already had these thingeys where if you want to open the window more than a few inches you have to press in this thingey that (I believe) most kids wouldn't be able to figure out how to use. Then there is the screen behind it.

Are these contraptions available to add to existing windows that don't have them? You say you have furniture in front of some windows. That would seem to do the trick if the furniture is heavy and the kids can't move it. (As long as you could fling it to access the window easily if you needed to get out). For my house, I got one of those fire ladders to plop on the sill and crawl down. Though I can't imagine Vietbabe would be able to use it and would have to go down on my back. I had it in a box in the basement but after watching Towering Inferno one late night, broke it open and put it in my bedroom. In terms of apartment living, I am still in shock over Eric Clapton's 4 year old falling 48 stories. There needs to be at least something on there. Especially if you have cleaning people who might leave the windows open.

On a less dramatic note - thanks for all the advice on slugs. PS - I took the anti-slug advice on here before the post warning about chemicals. I dumped the stuff on the dahlia area as a preventive but I think it killed my dahlias. Bummer. Serves me right. And worse, after thinking the milky liquid was safer for Babe than pellets, before the milky liquid could be absorbed in the ground, Babe got an ice cream with gumballs as eyes (Dora) from the darn ice cream truck and it fell out of her mouth and dropped on the liquid mess in the garden and she bolted for it to put back it back in her mouth. Man, it's amazing how you just can't think of everything. That Dora's eye would fall out, right into a wet mess of major pesticides and child would grab it and injest. Shudder.

Speaking of taking advice, as per Atticus I now have this as my mailbox, having been able to purchase it with my $100 Amazon gift certificate.


I have no time to dilly dally over these things. Atticus posted that it was a great mailbox and so I just bought it right away. You have such influence, Atticus. I like it but warning -- it is huge and I'm thinking too big for my teeny cape cod which has a cottage look. But darn if it doesn't hold several issues of magazines including the book size "Real Simple" magazine.

As for the Peapod, my sister swears by them. I didn't have it when Vietbabe was a teeny infant, but I would order on Netgrocer.com everything and it was nice to have on the screen different baby and kiddie-starter foods you could try. You can ponder what new baby foods they might like (and agonize over what bath time stuff, etc. you want) in the comfort of you home, rather than standing confused in the baby food. Plus your orders are "saved" so you can reorder by pulling up the prior order and revising it. Comes by fedex. Was it pricey? I don't remember. I was exhausted and clicking away on the computer after the 4 am feeding and not paying attention to cost.

[pony_trekker]

There is absolutely, positively, absofucking posilutely no sport more exciting than playoff hockey.

Even if the players are 8 to 10 years old.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by viet_mom
I have no time to dilly dally over these things. Atticus posted that it was a great mailbox and so I just bought it right away. You have such influence, Atticus. I like it but warning -- it is huge and I'm thinking too big for my teeny cape cod which has a cottage look. But darn if it doesn't hold several issues of magazines including the book size "Real Simple" magazine.

Just paint it white. Everything looks smaller painted white.

[soup sandwich]

Originally posted by pony_trekker
There is absolutely, positively, absofucking posilutely no sport more exciting than playoff hockey.

Even if the players are 8 to 10 years old.

In related news, I attended my 3 year-old's ballet recital this weekend. Having had no sisters, I had never attended one before. It wasn't so bad. Certainly the parts where Soupette#1 was on stage were great. I guess the question is whether after 10 years of these things I'll still feel the same way.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by soup sandwich
In related news, I attended my 3 year-old's ballet recital this weekend. Having had no sisters, I had never attended one before. It wasn't so bad. Certainly the parts where Soupette#1 was on stage were great. I guess the question is whether after 10 years of these things I'll still feel the same way.

The toughest decision that the father of daughters will make is whether to hand over their precious angels to French women, or Romanian men, to be berated and starved.

Personally, I'd go with the French women, if only because the aethetic payoff is greater, and because you don't want men to exchange knowing looks in ten years when one says, "She's a gymnast, you know."

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
The toughest decision that the father of daughters will make is whether to hand over their precious angels to French women, or Romanian men, to be berated and starved.

Personally, I'd go with the French women, if only because the aethetic payoff is greater, and because you don't want men to exchange knowing looks in ten years when one says, "She's a gymnast, you know."

Mphmmm. Much better for her to have a horrific eating disorder than for men to think she might be fun to have sex with.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Mphmmm. Much better for her to have a horrific eating disorder than for men to think she might be fun to have sex with.

I think that the (mainly correct) point of the Atticus post was that the eating disorder is a given with either option. Though I was a gymnast (until I kept on growing ever taller dammit) and I never lucked into the anorexia.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I think that the (mainly correct) point of the Atticus post was that the eating disorder is a given with either option. Though I was a gymnast (until I kept on growing ever taller dammit) and I never lucked into the anorexia.

Huh. I don't associate eating disorders with gymnasts. My mistake, apparently.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
The toughest decision that the father of daughters will make is whether to hand over their precious angels to French women, or Romanian men, to be berated and starved.

Personally, I'd go with the French women, if only because the aethetic payoff is greater, and because you don't want men to exchange knowing looks in ten years when one says, "She's a gymnast, you know."

Are these really the only two options? I was looking forward to having them learn to play drums and bass, and perhaps the cowbell.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
Are these really the only two options? I was looking forward to having them learn to play drums and bass, and perhaps the cowbell.

They are GIRLS. God, Flinty, girls can't be in BANDS.

Maybe they can learn to play the harp.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
Are these really the only two options? I was looking forward to having them learn to play drums and bass, and perhaps the cowbell.

I think your daughters are uniquely suited to the cymbals, esp. if you want to save them from a life of grinding organs whilst leashed to mustachioed Italians.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Mphmmm. Much better for her to have a horrific eating disorder than for men to think she might be fun to have sex with.

Right. I cannot quote the entire routine, but I think Chris Rock says something about fatherhood being pass/fail, and the only way to fail is if your daughter is on the pole. I think he meant the stripper's pole, but I take a broader view because we hold ourselves to a higher standard in my family, and so include the Uneven Parallel Bars. And wangs.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
a life of grinding organs whilst leashed to mustachioed Italians.

This describes your wife on our last date.

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
They are GIRLS. God, Flinty, girls can't be in BANDS.

Maybe they can learn to play the harp.

I think Meg White is living proof of the fact that while girls can be in bands, they cannot necessarily learn to play drums.